Opinions on Stowe and Tonbridge

[Alanauk]

Hi, our Headmaster mentioned those two boarding schools for Year 9 entry. I wanted to know any recent information about both schools. I know Tonbridge is really competitive; and Stowe, my feeling is that it is getting better academically. Any information is really appreciated.

I don’t know anything about Stowe.

Tonbridge is beautiful with amazing facilities but has a reputation locally as being ‘alpha male’ where those who excel at sport are treated like heroes and everyone else is looked down on. The boys don’t have a good reputation for behaviour, think toxic masculinity. I also don’t like it that exam results for the whole year are posted on the wall highest to lowest so that everyone can see who came bottom. I also know a boarder there at the moment who says it is not unusual to find water has been poured into your bed as a ‘joke.’

If I had to rank for DS in order of preference all the boarding schools in UK, I’m afraid Tonbridge would be in my bottom 10.

Oh wow! thank you for your message... had no idea!!

I have a DS there and it is honestly a wonderful school. Not everyone is sporty and there is no such toxic masculinity as described by the above poster that I am aware of, also never heard of scores posted on the board, certainly never been done for my son's year. It's a very inspirational school where there are so many opportunities for boys to thrive whatever may be their 'thing', be it music, drama or sports or neither if you wish. It is an academic school with stellar results, I suggest you visit the school for yourself.

Thank you for your message!!

Stowe in an allcomers school. People go there for 6th form if they don’t make the grades after gcse from other mainstream public schools so it definitely accepts very low grades. I’m sure it also supports bright children too. I’m just saying that it definitely takes those who struggle.
children I know are very happy there.
Sixth form can be quite isolating as it’s in the middle of nowhere so hard to nip away anywhere for the weekend. Think it’s moving to a weekly boarding model.

they buy in a lot of rugby talent for the first team so fee paying pupils will find it hard to make the first team in rugby.
Don’t know much about Tonbridge at all.

Thank you for your message!

I think it's quite risky to send a child to a non-academic boarding school because with a lack of parental oversight and low achieving peers there is not much incentive to do well. Seems a shame when the school fees are high! But I guess if your child isn't academic anyway there's limited downside.

That said, my brother went to Stowe and thinks it's a fabulous school. Wants to send his children there. He and his 2 closest friends from there all did terribly academically (never got degrees) with his friends leaving at 16 to work for their dads businesses. They are well spoken and present nicely and ultimately all became very high earners in sales roles with beautiful lovely wives. My brother credits Stowe with the fact he's a good salesman and generally successful in life. There were a few lost years between leaving education and him getting his act together, filled with drugs, misogyny and an inability to hold down a job, which I partly attribute to the Stowe influence also. When he was a teenager he was a vile little drug-taking cunt and would come home in the holidays making us all miserable with his sexism. But that sort of attitude is fairly common at other boys public schools too.

There was horrible bullying when he was there, as I understand it.

Totally different ends of the spectrum. Tonbridge very academic and sporty so attracts the top in those areas, Stowe accepts anyone so academically is a complete mix. Can’t really believe they’d be on the same list as contenders. Best to visit both and get a feel for them

Thank you all for your messages!

I would avoid Stowe. My nephew left 2 years ago, he used to be pelted with sweets by other boys when he tried to revise for exams. His sister chased boys, became anorexic and got tattoos. Family are still picking up the pieces.

They are well spoken and present nicely and ultimately all became very high earners in sales roles with beautiful lovely wives.

Bloody state education, you end up being rough as a dog's arse and married to a minger.
Or did you mean something else?

Oh no do you feel victimised?

Get a grip and stop looking for offence.

Imagine lurking on the boarding school thread so you can find opportunities to jump in and quote out of context in order to try and ignite some kind of argument.

Imagine that!