Surrey area with a diverse mix of mums?

[Serengetiicome]

I am a black mum of one who is originally from London, but moved to Surrey a few years ago.

Since I had my child I have attempted to get to know other mums in the area. Despite attending NCT antenatal classes and many playgroups I have not made any close friendships. It’s left me feeling lonely and worried about my DC’s childhood experiences in the future if we were to remain living where we do.

I have one mum friend who lives very close to me (who is white) who has not struggled at all and has made many close friendships with the other local mums. It’s difficult not to believe that my experience is partly due to my race.

Because of this I have decided to move, at least before my DC starts school. The problem is, I like the quietness of Surrey and the access to vast green spaces that it has. But I can no longer live in an area where I struggle to find my tribe simply because I don’t look like the other mums. I think I need to move closer to London, but I don’t want to move back to London itself. Any ideas? Is there an area close to London, preferably in Surrey, with an active mums’ community that reflects the ethnic diversity of London? I can’t think of anywhere but I’m desperately hoping for a few ideas to get started in my search.

Which part of Surrey were you thinking, the county is diverse in terms of house prices, commuting and demographic.

It might be worth checking out Caterham and Redhill.

I know one of these areas and it wouldn’t be for me. I’d like to be closer to London by car.

I second Redhill x

Am I'm Redhill. We have every colour here and almost every imaginable combination. Come and join us

also here to say Redhill. Especially if considering your child’s school. St Matthew’s has a diverse mix of children / staff.

One of those is inside the M25 and the other just outside. You are going to struggle to find somewhere in Surrey that is closer to London.

There's not much of Surrey closer by car. Maybe Warlingham , Kenley or Epsom unless you want Croydon ( which is not Surrey)

As a PP said, Kenley is worth a look too. It’s just inside Greater London but also on the edge of greenbelt and is culturally/socially diverse. Or maybe Old Coulsdon. Both these areas have a Surrey feel. If you look any further in is very much part of the great Metropolis.
Further to the west you could look at Wellington, Carshalton & Sutton.

Thanks for the suggestions. I know Redhill reasonably well (I’m not that far away) but I’ve not attended any parent-toddler events in the area. Can you recommend any that are good and encourage chatting amongst the parents?

Regarding the move, I was hoping for areas in North Surrey as I can drive into London fairly quickly. I know several areas in North Surrey (Elmbridge) but they don’t appear to be diverse in the slightest. Could I have missed an area?

have you considered Woking ? It’s very diverse

Move over west of Elmbridge into Runnymede, and then Spelthorne. There is plenty of diversity to be seen.

I've only just found out about black Mumsnet and come across this post. What did you decide to do in the end? hear and feel your pain. I'm in Runnymede and it's a lot more diverse now compared to when I moved here but still struggling to find my tribe

I’m in Elmbridge and whilst it is a lot more diverse than when I was growing up, I wouldn’t say it was diverse. But I am happy here.

New Malden?

Just reading this thread. Where are you now? I can struggle to make friends but think it is my personality rather than my skin colour! I have lots of established friendships (white) but struggled to make school mum friends. I’m always envious of people that make friends easily and can chat to
anyone.