Due December 08 - time to start blooming and glowing.

[JamInMyWellies]

New thread lovely ladies

CONGRATULATIONS, artichokes! That's fantastic news. I had full pay during my first maternity leave (have now changed companies though) and it was great.

Back from a weekend away to see relatives. It was nice enough, but in total it was about 14 hours driving for a visit that lasted about three! People were glad to see us but I could have done without spending my birthday on the motorway!

I have a day off today but am feeling quite - the weather isn't helping - so almost wish I'd gone in! Hey ho. Hope everyone else is doing fine.

Hello everyone.

I have no internet at home and its really annoying. I miss Mumsnet so much!!!

I hope everyone is ok and feeling well.

I think I felt the baby move a few days ago but I'm not really too sure.

Hope to catch up soon!!

hi everyone, hope you had a good weekend?

Artichokes - congratulations on the promotion, you must be really pleased!

Thanks to those who commented on my heartbeat/16 wk check up question - luckily my OH can come now (so I bet they don't listen for it!), I like the idea of recording it on my phone though, hadn't through of that.

I'm interested in the sleep tales, especially those with babies who didn't. My OH works away 3 nights a week, so I do really want a routine or I know I won't be able to function on my own if I don't. But honestly, is this realistic? (I think I'd prefer the bad news now, rather than have to come to terms with it at 3am in Jan next year!)

Hi everyone, we had a nice weekend despite the horrid weather yesterday. My DD has been watching the Sound of Music repeatedly at our friends' house recently, and keeps breaking into strange confused medleys of all the songs, which anyone present has to sit and watch then applaud. I keep finding myself humming the tunes too, that's not so cute...

I took a sneaky peak at the Due in June thread - a good place to see what brand new mums have to say about sleep and routines. I did a relaxed version of Gina Ford with my DD, and she slept through from early on - but I think that was as much luck as anything else. Some babies just seem to hate routines in the early weeks, some love it. My DH was quite strict with not letting me pick her up at the slightest noise, and I'm grateful he did - it was difficult then but seems much harder to do if you wait until they're older. But they need to eat frequently in the early weeks and there's no getting away from that.

I hope I get to hear the HBs with the MW this week, though apparently it's tough to find both with twins. So no doubt there's something new to worry about!

Two friends touched my fat belly growing bump at the weekend - I guess that means I'm looking very pg. I'm not sure if I liked it.

artichokes congratulations on your promotion, that's fantastic news!

gettingbigger I hated people touching my bump, apart from dh. I don't know why being pregnant suddenly makes you public property!

Re routines, ds was in a routine from early on but it was one he kind of put himself into iyswim. I did find it useful to not let him sleep more than 30mins past a feed (except at night!) and I think that helped a lot. But I would say not to stress about it for at least the first 6 weeks and probably longer!

Congratulations artichokes that is fantastic foryou

hmm routines...I just let ds do his own thing really. I think even the most attachment parenting type learns to not pick their baby up at the slightest noise eventually as they make a lot of noise in their sleep. I just fed on demand and watched his cues. Looking back although he was a clingy baby who didn't like being held by anyone else he was pretty easy. Frequent feeder day and night but efficient (as in 5 mins a feed). We mostly co-slept after dp got over his "he should be in a cot" stage but once he was 8 weeks or so and had stopped cluster feeding in the evenings he went to bed at 7 in a cot in another room (we were both students and needed our room for study). He settled there very easily and gradually started spending more of the night in there, always dictated by his wants.

And thatwasprobably more than zoe wanted! Anyway Zoe I would say that obviously when the baby is ill itis very difficult being on your own but actually most of the time it is fine, and sometimes easier as you don't feel like you are disturbing your dh if you feed in bed or can't settle the baby etc. Just don't set too high expectations of yourself as those days you won't get a nap while he takes baby when he gets in from workso you really do have to sleep when thebaby does and not give a fig about housework!

I'm with Indith on routines. I felt the stress of getting my baby in a routine would interfere with the bonding, cuddling and generally adoring her for the first few weeks. Also I am not sure routines and breast feeding are very compatible in the first weeks - the baby has growth spurts and on some days wants to feed all the time if you try and feed to a regiment the baby may not get enough and can't tell your body it needs to up its supply (the more your baby sucks the more milk you produce). However by about 3 months DD had got into her own routine with naps and nights. Thankfully she was a good sleeper at the beginning otherwise I suppose I may have felt differently!

If you haven't already discovered it get hold of The Baby Whisperer book by Tracy Someone (have lent mine to someone so can't remember surname). It was great for geting DS into a routine quite quickly. I am too anal for Gina Ford and was advised by my midwife to not even read it or I'd end up with a nervous breakdown!

I read both Tracy Hogg & Gina Ford pre-ds being born and decided I'd go with GF. Then ds was born and I switched entirely to TH! Having said that, it wasn't because I wanted ds in a rigid routine, more that I wanted to get to know what he wanted.

I think it comes down to personal preference, I know people who have done GF and found it brilliant but then they were very much career people and used to having everything in their control iyswim. I'm a bit more relaxed so TH suited me better. And I have another friend who chose to follow the Continuum idea. Don't know if anyone's come across that - it was in the C4 programme with Claire Verity!

Sorry for the long post, just wanted to say basically read around, see what you think & then decide when your baby's born & you know what they're like!

artichokes well done on the promotion!

nolda glad you had good results from the amnio. Do you know what you are having?

Re routines, I found, like Rosmerta, that mine sort of fell into their own routines. Once they are past the baby stage I am pretty anal about them though (i.e. dinner,play, bath, stories, milk for toddler, teeth, bed). Much as I love them, I am always very happy to tuck them up in bed for the night.

And regarding sleeping through the night, people have different ideas what that is anayway. I would call it 7pm til about 6.30am but other people would have different ideas.

artichokes well done on the promotion!

nolda glad you had good results from the amnio. Do you know what you are having?

Re routines, I found, like Rosmerta, that mine sort of fell into their own routines. Once they are past the baby stage I am pretty anal about them though (i.e. dinner,play, bath, stories, milk for toddler, teeth, bed). Much as I love them, I am always very happy to tuck them up in bed for the night.

And regarding sleeping through the night, people have different ideas what that is anyway. I would call it 7pm til about 6.30am but other people would have different ideas.

whoops sorry about the double post

Yep, bedtime routine very important

I would forget all about routines to start with TBH, then see what your baby is like and what you feel comfortable with and set your own pattern, based on whatever. DS was a very needy, colicky, non-sleeping baby and if I'd been trying to follow a rigid routine I would have drive myself into depression. Some babies like a fixed routine and settle well to one, some don't. You don;t know which type you'll get in advance! Concentrate on enjoying your tiny baby and getting used to each other.

If you want to focus on one thing, agree that bedtime routine a good one for differentiating night and day.

I found the No Cry Sleep Solution a very good and helpful book - no set routine, more ideas to try and improve things. Not that many of them worked on DS until he was ready... but I won't bore you with all that

I think 'sleeping through' for a small baby is actually 5 hours at a stretch.

DD slept 6 and 7 hour stretches through the night for the first few months. Sometimes she even did 9. It was much later when she started to test us .

I totally agree with the importance of a good bedtime routine once they are old enough to be aware. DD is 23 months and has a very regimented last hour to her day (when she stayed the night at her grandma's it took us two A4 sides to write down all the instructions for that one hour!). It works wonders.

Evening ladies

Routines - after fretting for the first couple of months about how long DS 'should' be going between feeds and how many naps he should have, I relaxed and embraced my inner hippy and just went with the flow, which surprised me somewhat as I was a fairly precise person at work. When DS started to eat food at about 6 months I found his routine really settled down round mealtimes, with a sleep after breakfast and another after lunch. Then at about a year he dropped the morning one and slept longer after lunch.

hello - just wanted to say, i love the NHS.

we had to wait nearly 2 hours for a regular doctor's appointment at the hospital today, and when we got there the registrar was FANTASTIC - calm, kind, sense of humour, clear, concise, reassuring. hurrah! so worth the wait.

i hope some of you have had good experiences, too.

oh, and he found the heartbeat at 16 weeks, which has reassured us a bit (jittery firsttimers post 2 m/c incl i mmc last year). only 4 weeks until the 20 week scan now...

hope all is well with you ladies.

On commute from hell and need to vent!
DD got upset this am re her Peppa Pig trainers (don't ask) so missed early train. Got to stn just as next one left. Big gap til next one after that - which is horribly busy so I always try to go earlier. No seats. Then chap almost faints so everyone making way for him but my bump still evidently has cloaking device activated. Eventually was v shaky and wobbly and burst into tears on way off train. Thanked one guy for listening to his iPod and staring at my (invisible) bump w/o offering a seat . Was comforted at clapham by random stranger who gave me a big hug. Feel like idiot now for not asking for seat but is sooo ingrained that you don't speak on train. Now also have splendid realisation that don't look pg, just lardy. Harrumph!

I didn't follow a strict routine with DD but will try with this one after the early weeks because I can't see how I will manage both of them otherwise! I was very lucky with DD in that once we had finally got her to sleep in the evening she stayed that way till about 6 from quite early on.

Majormoo I don't know yet what sex the baby is but will hopefully find out when we go for the 20 week scan. We will ask the sonographer and then check her answer at the fetal medicine office round the corner. At least that was how it worked when I was expecting DD.

oh verso poor you. I had to do the tube last time round and bearing in mind it was the middle of winter. So I would get on the tube northern line [shudder] and if no one stood up for me I would push my tummy right out and literally shove it someones face if that didnt work I just used to say I am pregnant who is going to offer me a seat! Worked a treat you have to be brave and just go for it at the end of the day you are unlikely to upset anyone as they are normally mortified.

As far as routines go we kind of went with the flow for the first few weeks with DS but we always tried to go to bed at around 10/11ish and pretty much from the first night we would top and tail give a feed etc then into moses basket in our room. I always kept the lights off or on vv low dim when the bubba woke up to feed and as soon as he had fed I would burp him and straight back down. It then progressed to going to bed earlier introducing bath time etc. Now he is 13mth and we still follow the bath, story, quiet time etc and we can literally chuck him in and he goes straight off to sleep. Now daytimes were an unmitigated disaster he hardly slept until he hit 6mth but we will gloss over that bit.

doh missed half a sentance out there.

bearing in mind it was winter I would take my coat off and shove

Verso big hugs - you poor thing. I'm so glad someone was nice to you afterwards. I only got the tube occasionally in my last pregnancy and was too embarrassed to ask for a seat until I was huge.

But I used to draw attention to myself by asking the people by the wall if they would mind swopping with me so I could lean against the wall - people sitting down would sometimes turn around at the amazing spectacle of people actually talking to eachother on the tube and offer me a seat, or whoever I was standing next to and had heard me ask to swop would often take pity and rustle up a seat for me.