Due in June and entering the home stretch - keep the creme eggs rolling!

[makecakesnotwar]

And the Revels, the Greek Yogurt and the curly fries....

Welcome Wombat, where abouts in South west are you (there are a few of us on here from this region) gosh what a long maternity leave as well, enjoy.

Outskirts of Bristol. Luckily i get 9 months mat leave with seven weeks ann leave to add on, only benefits to working in the NHS!

Ernest - positives to moving sooner - being with Daddy, living closer to Legoland - ds1's Birthday treat perhaps?, living closer to me etc etc... I think you've just got to be honest with them, explain it all in a positive way, eg, Daddy's found them a fantastic new house to live , school would like them to start soon , all together again, much better to move now because you'll have more time before baby comes to help them settle into new school/kindergarten, if they moved in the sumer baby would get in the way! etc. Don't ask them about it, tell them this is what's happening, and the leaving party is a great idea.

Good news about your neighbour showing people around the house.

makecakes lol at the idea of a wife swap!! Hope your kitchen is lovely, dh is putting in our new kitchen, bit by bit, it's from Ikea and is proving to be a nightmare.

Whinegums - hope you feel better soon

Josey - you going to have ocean sounds on cd during labour then?

Rolf - no maternity clothes yet???, do a few "pretend" online orders for some new stuff, tell him the cost and see if that shifts him!

TheGreenFairy - I'm 28 weeks today too

DH is ok really. And to be fair, I think a lot of the maternity clothes in storage are little more than rags, and I've borrowed things from friends

When I'm pregnant, despite all evidence to the contrary, I think I am absolutely gorgeous. It's only when I see photos of myself or walk past a mirror that I realise the sad truth. So not having the full complement of maternity clothes is nowhere near as bad as it sounds. If anyone can carry off stretchy pants worn halfway down her arse it is beautiful me

hi everyone - ernest, I agree with deb, loads of positives to sell to the boys. The leaving party is a great idea particularly as one of them was looking forward to party in August. He can have the party now and another treat for his birthday,

makecakes - are you feeling a bit more cheery and loved today?

LOL at all the numpty-like DH's. I have to confess to being very lucky with mine, although he has his numpty like moments. Because he knows that I have zero interest in you know what (whenever I even think about it the LO starts to wriggle about ) he's being very well behaved and understanding. However I've had to point out that this doesn't mean I dont want cuddles. Bless him.

Wombat - my 2nd trimester energy has passed me by too. I'm hugely envious of your early mat leave. I had 6 weeks to take before official mat leave but have taken some of it already. I'll finish up a month before and will work 4 days a week from the end of April but it seems like ages away (except when I think of the handover notes I still have to work on).

Anyway, getting to skive off work very early today so best go and do some work for now!

rolf and greenfairy i'm 28 weeks tomorrow and getting 3d scan. i'm so excited!! after much pleading and negotiation i'm convinced dh is never going to let me find out the sex so i've given up. the surprise will be lovely anyway.

josey i'm incredibly impressed with your dh. mine will do stuff around the house but only when asked 2/3/4 times. he does iron his own shirts though - it's one job i refuse to do. i think it's the canadian in me - we're not big ironers like you brits.

i dreamt i had a good old snog with david beckham last night. he was at a family party in canada for some reason. funny because i don't have a particular thing for him or anything but did notice quite a nice photo of him in an ad yesterday so i guess it piqued my subconscious.

Hope you enjoy the 3D scan DM. Good for you not fretting about waiting to see what you get . It might be totally obvious from the scan which would be a nice, non-confrontational way of finding out.

DH is Canadian too (but not lived there since childhood - he sounds English). Maybe in men it translates as numptiness and in women as something rather more sensible . It's a bit unfair to blame his numptiness on being Canadian, actually.

rolf Upside down cake I am probably too late for your meeting with Doula but I thought I would tell you about my experience with the one I booked. My first instinct when I talked to her on the phone was the she was very abrupt. Still went on meeting her and she seemed lovely, quite hands on and skilled. She had all the right answers, told us she was accomodating and not controversial etc and we hired her. As you all know I want to try and have an hypnobirthing birth, so we invited her to the last session. She was utterly aggressive to the teacher as she had developped her own technique of hypnobirthing which of course was complete bullshit and she didn't take too week being told that what she was doing might be an aid to relaxation but not hypnobirthing. Then she was disruptive, rude and distracted for the whole session. I won't go into the details but I was shocked at her behavious.

From that we realised that:

1. she had well rehearesed her interview answers but wasn't as she had described herself
2. she was failry aggressive and confrontational
3. the birth was about her and what she thought she was going to do for us, she had to have centre stage, but she pay no respect to me or to my choices
4. I have reasons to believe that a lot of skills she said she had were bull...t as in respect of at least two of them she used the terminology but wasn't trained in any way.

So I would say: be careful, prompt, ask etc..If you have any nagging doubt, see some other ones. Try to check that what she says is true and that if she says she has trained in this and that she can prove it. And upsidedowncake if you think she sounded pushy, I would really beware as pushy is really not what you will need. You need someone ascertive and firm but not pushy as it is your birth and you don't want to have to manage the hopital birth and your DH and your doula.

Any way hope you both find a good one. Let me know how it goes. And sorry I went on and on

What a horrible experience for you.

I have booked the one doula I met, and (naively, I guess) haven't interviewed anyone else. She seems very gentle and calm in her manner and is already "known" to the hospital as she teaches yoga there.

Like you, I'm hoping to use hypnosis during my delivery and hope that the doula will be able to support that. I'm going to get more information from the hypno teacher and pass it on to the doula so she knows if the hypnosis technique she is familiar with (natal hypnotherapy) is the same as the one I'll be learning.

Have you found someone else to be your doula?

rolf I think gentle and calm is what you need! Did you ask her how she feld about hypnobirthing.

Luckily my MW seems very supportive so I hope I'll manage to get that HB. I was so put off by the experience that I have given up on the doula and set my sights on HB instead.

Blimmey I can't believe how much you ladies have written since last Friday took me at least an hour to catch up

Latest on me: saw MW this week and all is well. Saw a specialist obstetric physio who has put my pelvis back in place (ouch ouch ouch). DD has been sick and excluded from nursery but completely thrilled that we bought her a new big girl's bed.

Need to go and do some work now as I spend to long to catch up!

Ernest good luck with the move. You are so brave!

all the others and newbies big hugs

needahand the doula you met has some serious issues!!!! Good job you fond out before the birth!

Ernest, massive luck with the move. Hopefully you'll be settled in by the time baby arrives. Good luck with telling your boys.

DLM - I'm sure I've said this many times, I'm very envious of your sacn. Hopefully baby will open its legs for all to see!

I had my midwives appointment and my blood pressure is back to its normal low sate so I'm vert relieved. Was told to book another in 3 weeks but had to make it four as it's over the easter holidays and I don't want to have to rush back from my mums. Fundal height was measured and it was 1 cm bigger than average which I exected and I also heard the heartbeat.

needahand - lucky you found out about your doula before the birth!

My DP fits into the numpty category most of the time, but still manages to be sweet about it! I washed the baby clothes the other day, but didn't have time to hang them up - which I asked him to do. He moved the basket (full of wet clothes) from one chair to another without remembering to hang them up and then later proceeded to tell me how he felt all warm and fuzzy when he saw the tiny socks! Swwet? Yes! But still wet clothes!

hi all
LOL at your DP nettie, sounds just like mine. He can be lovely - insists I not carry heavy stuff upstairs etc, but when I leave a huge basket of clean clothes right at the bottom of the stairs for him to carry up - and ask him to do so in case his blind spot strikes again - he just steps over it and it's still there the next day!!
I have 5 weeks left at work, only 4 days per week and 2 of those 'working from home'. the other 2 I commute to London and am completely shattered when I get home. we live on take-away pizza those days as DH incapable of cooking...

G43 I know the thing that irks me the most is the other day I answered a local thread and when I went back to it I saw she advertised her services on it (she lives quite far from where I leave) including her "hypnotherapy skill" that really made my blood boil.But I guess it is each to its own and some prople might love her style. But yes I was glad I realised before the birth.

Good news about you BP! I have no idea what Fundal height is though!

btw Rolf, much sympathy on the itchy legs. I have the itchiest boobs in the world, to the point I wake up having drawn blood from scratching in the night. the only relief during the day is to not wear a bra and just a light baggy shirt, but not really appropriate for the office...

sounds like you had a lucky escape needahand, must be tempting to re-post on the local thread with a warning, but possibly not a great idea! I was lucky with my DD, have a good friend who used to be a nurse and has 3 kids who offered to be a birth partner which worked out really well. she helped DH as much as me, and was thrilled to hold the baby while DH helped me with a bath afterwards. I am keeping fingers crossed she will be with me again this time.

Jood - my DP does that too! won't let me carry groceries from the car, but if he needs help emptying the car of rugby balls (he's a rugby coach) then it's all hands on deck! honestly - a bag of groceries is heaps lighter than a bag of balls!

Rolf I've had itchy leg - not legs - leg. just the left one. I've scratched it to bleeding now too (in my defence, I do it while I'm sleeping).

nettie and jood my dh sounds exactly the same. he's so sweet but sometimes i swear he has no common sense whatsoever. he's always saying, don't do too much, don't overdo it, leave it until i get home, etc. but then i'll ask him to say, unload the dishwasher and he'll unload the top, or the bottom. then he'll get distracted. many times i've asked him to hang up laundry when i go to bed and it's wet in the basket when i wake up.

my favourite though is when i ask him to do something and there is something else that he could easily do right beside it... can't think of a specific example, but he will only do EXACTLY what i've asked of him and not one iota more. it's quite a talent really.

g43 that's great about your blood pressure being down! i'm sure fundal height is give or take a bit anyway, how accurate are they with the exact top of the uterus!!

will def be posting some 3d pics tomorrow .

jood I thought about it, but then I would put MN in the lurch as the other lady would complain, would probably have to reveal my identity to prove I am not committing defamation etc..so not worth it. As I said anyway she might not be for me, but might be what some other people need. Re itchy boobs..I know what you mean!

exactly the same dylansmum, my personal favourite is leaving teaspoons on the worktop above the dishwasher, just after watching me empty it...

gotta go eat something, stomach the size of a walnut now so need to eat every hour or so otherwise I start feeling sick again

joy joy joy

ah that reminds me he used to leave used teabags on the counter all the time. i got to the point that i was threatening to remove all tea from the house (and break his fingers ) if he didn't make it the half a step to put them in the bin!!

Laughing at your DH's Dylansmum & Jood, mine is of the same ilk. When I ask him to wash up, he will do exactly that. He won't think about collecting the mugs in the front room or wiping down the sides or even the sink, but he does wash up....

However I've discovered that the best way to get him to do something is to start to do it myself. Eg: if I start cleaning the bathroom (which has no windows) he will panic about me breathing in the chemicals and take over. Bless.

He used to put used teabags in the sink, even though the bin was much, much closer. When I asked why, he said his Mum always did! He's 40 next year and left home at the age of 16....!

Hope everyone is well, I need to catch up properly with all your posts, but today is ny last day at work until after Easter so I'm running out that door in 4 minutes. Ok, waddling out that door then...

Have a great itch free weekend everyone.

Lots of news from everyone and from me.

Right, the doula. I think she might have been needahand's one - (well not really as she doesn't live in MK, but anyway) ...

She didn't turn up and when I phoned to see what was happening, she said she didn't have a chance to phone me to let me know. (So why she didn't SHE phone me at the beginning of the appointment as she was plainly capable of taking a call half way through it?)

So I said, well I didn't want to reschedule as the whole thing was about trust, and she'd lost mine. And she said fine, she understood.

The really weird part was that she phoned back 5 minutes later and said ... and I quote ... 'Mothers need to understand that doulas are very busy ladies, and can't always make their appointments.' WTF!!!! By this time, I was hopping. Really Isn't the whole firkin point that the doula is the one person at the birth who you can rely on????? Anyway, I didn't swear at her (just you ladies ), but just repeated my trust mantra and she went away.

My first instinct about pushiness was right, but I didn't pick up unreliability - it was just that she came with such good personal references. Of course DH has now gone right off the idea of having a doula and the term 'charlatans' is being bandied about.

I think I am going to sit on it for a bit and then phone a few more. We'll see.

'Mothers need to understand that doulas are very busy ladies, and can't always make their appointments.' I commend you for being so calm to her!!!!

I thought I'd do a second message for the news about my friend and her DH.

Not ten minutes after I've put the phone down to the mad doula, the phone goes again. Of course, I think it's the mad doula again and make DH answer.

It's the South African husband who is phoning for advice about being a good daddy ... In the previous three hours, he'd had a complete volte face and was unbelievably contrite. Anyway, we had a big long chat about being a daddy and being understanding to my friend now she is pregnant, about his fears and trepidations, about his controlling behaviour, about whether he could have caused a miscarriage by being such a S**T over the last 48 hours, and about how he was going to look after my friend and be the best husband ever.

I then had a long chat with my friend - and another one today, and she is deliriously happy and we are having the conversations we should have - which books to buy ... how much her boobs have grown already ... all the lovely stuff. I'm so happy for her that she can enjoy it now.

Re her DH, I guess none of us can understand other people's marriages. I don't think she'll hold his behaviour over him, but I also think her mostly strong approach was vindicated.

Today has been rather boring in contrast.

Re itchy legs, there is a kind of dermatitis that is v common in pregnancy. I also have it. I saw the doctor today about my suspected pre-eclampsia - less puffy, higher blood pressure but only have to go back every two weeks now - She noticed my rash and prescribed me a cream.

Ernest, sorry it's so difficult. How did telling them go? Re money, I wondered whether your DH gets a relocation allowance, and this could be boosted because of all the mucking around. I'm sure you've thought of that.

Hope everyone else well.

Ironically the doula has a website and essentially a whole brand identity about being a comforter!