October 2017 #5!

[GimbleInTheWabe]

Hope no one minds me setting up a new thread- we were getting full up on the other one!

Here is the link to the deets sheet, feel free to add or edit your details as you please:
docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1pa8LZMKMLvREYH4kFiNqn1dD7aTb053cT_KHvghwvSM/edit?usp=sharing

Bring on the third trimester aches, midwife appointments and birth plan chat!

@GimbleInTheWabe @boxesoffrogs I posted a hospital bag list that I got from my ante natal classes but it said take 10 baby bodysuits I think that too much & after speaking to over mums have decided to go with this list. www.pampers.co.uk/pregnancy/giving-birth/article/what-to-pack-in-your-hospital-bag-go-bag-checklist sounds like u have a lot going on boxes with house move etc, thought we were bad enough just finished renovating & sorting mortgage out. I'm 33 + 4 today & finishing work tomorrow using holidays before maternity though & I'm so pleased I am as I'm really struggling this week, just lack of sleep & a bit of a blocked nose, I've noticed tiredness had kicked in again. I'm getting paranoid about baby movements too so just need to relax. My husbands friends girlfriend is in hospital now waiting for them to either break her waters or give her a c section, she's been there since Monday! She's due 29 august. xx

Other mums not over

Yep bobbie, teacher here, glutton for punishment eh? Assume you are one as well... what do you teach?

kitkat thanks for the list. just went for a long walk with the dog. It was nice and peaceful, but now back home and feeling rubbish. Something is wrong and I can't quite put my finger on it, if you know what I mean? Not normally this short tempered and angry.

Just bumped into an old school friend (she was getting delicious smelling Indian take away), usual 'congratulations', 'when are you due?', 'your tiny, I would never have guessed'... oh blah blah, bollocks bollocks. I know she was just being nice but it made me feel rubbish again. Plus dp has just told me he won't be getting home til past ten AGAIN. Can't help feeling that this is going to be what life is like when the baby gets here, and I am sick and tired of it. Hey ho, pasta for one it is again (or two, if you count the dog).

Just panic bought some new born stuff from Tesco, first time I have ordered online, and managed to click three times on a changing mat that I do not want! And after calling a customer services less than ten mins after, they can't cancel it as it is through a different company. Ffs. I now have four changing mats. Anyone need a spare??!

@boxesoffrogs How come your husband works so late? I thought with internet companies it was the law that you can cancel within 24 hours or something? Or is it that you have to ring the other company? GAH! With days like yours sometimes I just say sod it and go to bed early. Close down the day and hope tomorrow will be better.

kitkat he is a plumber so although he has his own 'company' he gets commissioned out through another one, if that makes sense? So he can get emergency calls up to 11pm.
Going to have a bath and try and chill. Get so restless these days though and don't want to be arsey with him when he finally gets in as I know he has had a long day. But part of me is so so cross that he is working so many long hours. And I am the one still paying for all the baby stuff on my crappy teacher salary.
If I am honest I would rather be back at work, would give me something to do (been doing it for over ten years now so don't really need to do any lesson planning or anything - five years at the same school, and just for the news that my exam classes did rather well, so that makes me happy!) esp as I will be leaving in under a month when I get back.
had to give up my horse due to pregnancy which was my main hobby. Feel twitchy now in the evenings, feels like I have nothing to do. Would love nothing better than to go for a ride right now.
Need to be doing something productive, otherwise I sit and stew. Dog walks aren't the same.

Thanks for the hospital bag list @KitKatSplat , very helpful! I presume you are including nappies under the clothes for baby heading. Also what is the carrycot for?

@boxesoffrogs having more than one changing mat isn't a bad thing, you can have one upstairs and one downstairs, give one to anyone you will be visiting often like parents, use one as a sledge when it snows, etc

I had my second of three growth scans today and all is looking well, he is still on the small side but has climbed from about the 12th to just under the 20th centile, so that is reassuring. I think that growth is mostly biscuits based on my recent diet. The sonographer was really lovely and got a great pic of his face which she printed for me for free.

Yes @frogs, can't get enough lf looking after other people's kids all day so I thought I'd have one of my own to play with at home! Mostly teach A level psychology, but I'm often teaching other things too. What about you?

Is your DH able to take some time off work once the baby is born? My DH is sort of similar, he has a regular job but a crap commute so he's not home until about 8pm so I'm worried once the baby is born and his 2 weeks pat leave are uo, I'll pretty much be doing everything on my own.

I sorta get what you mean about the doing stuff too. I've been trying not to do much over the summer as I figure its the last time i'll be able to have a lie in or watch crappy movies or just sit doing nothing for a while. Try to embrace it, we'll be back at work before you know it!

pingu that's great news! Well done minipingu, and obviously the biscuits are helping... with that train of thought, is it wrong to have a Krispy Kreme for breakfast, there appear to be some in the fridge... and love the idea of a sledge!

bobbie, why do we do it??? I teach a-level sociology among other things, although according to a lot of people, apparently it's not a proper subject makes me cross. How long have you been teaching? I know I will be moaning about it as soon as I get back, but at the mo, just need some routine and stuff to take my mind off things. Plus at school, the days generally fly by (unless of course, it is bottom set year 9 on a Friday afternoon ) when are you starting Mat leave?

Sorry for being such a moaning Minnie last night, feeling slightly more chipper this morning, off to the midwife for 32 week appointment (at least I think that is what it is, I've lost count...)

Sorry bobbie forgot to answer re dp. He is going to take 2 weeks paternity leave, but then I will be in the same situation as you, he works crazy hours, often isn't home til past ten etc... he has said his mum will fly over and help out when he has to go back to work, but I am pretty sure that would be a hindrance rather than a help - she is lovely but a proper Irish mammy, and I would be terrified that my house keeping wouldn't be up to her standards, or that she would be subjected to the sight of me with no make up on, hair sticking up everywhere etc etc etc which would probably bring on an attack of the vapours or something

Just to add to hospital bag list I've now had three different people all say to me take loads of Lucozade drinks (the non-carbonated ones) and ensure you have straws so your birthing partner can help you to drink if you're in a position that doesn't let you easily tilt your head back. I've got my bag/suitcase out but feel too scared to put anything in it yet, think that makes it all feel a bit too real!! 🙈

I'd forgotten that but I definitely second the straws recommendation. I bought a large reusable water bottle with a built in straw last time, it was great. I bought another one after the birth as well since breastfeeding makes you insanely thirsty!

@PingusMistress - It's a little different for me as I'm living in Stockholm and here the hospital gives you enough nappies for your stay, so I don't need to factor those in. The carrycot is because we 1) Don't own a car and 2) Taxi companies here have to provide you with a car seat if requested, so we figured we'd take the carry cot to carry them from the hospital to the taxi.

@boxesoffrogs - Glad you are feeling a little bit better! Sounds like you were in a pretty big funk. If you're like me, I need to be doing something that makes me feel a little productive, like I've achieved something. Giving up the horse must have been tough. I appreciate it's a delicate subject, but have you talked to your OH about your expectations with him working so many hours once the baby is born? Does he HAVE to work so many hours? (meaning, can he financially afford to work less?) Also doesn't seem right to me that you are buying the baby clothes. He needs to pull his finger out there, if you don't mind me saying. Fair is fair.

God, I want a Krispy Kreme now!

Thanks for the explanation @KitKatSplat ! You are very lucky having a baby in the Swedish healthcare system, it is much better than the UK one, although I know you pay more tax for it. I used to work for a half Swedish company and my Swedish colleagues got fantastic maternity and paternity leave packages. I had to go to A&E in Stockholm for a minor issue whilst away with work, and was seen straight away and given free top quality treatment - so different from here!

Thanks @PingusMistress, the support system here does seem pretty amazing. However, much like the NHS, the healthcare system has been underfunded for many years, and there's very recently been quite a lot of protests because hospitals are getting filled up (especially in the summer) and women have to travel a long way to get to a hospital with enough space to give birth - much like how I found out a couple of days ago that my initial hospital of choice is estimated to be full during the week I give birth, so I had to pick another one, which was further away. And even then, my choice is not "guaranteed" - I still have to ring up the hospital when I am in labor to check they still have space for me. What's the deal in the UK?

I second what pingu said, it does sound like a good set up in Sweden! Not sure what the deal is in the UK, guess you just have to wait and see, and keep your fingers (and legs!) crossed that you don't end up giving birth in the corridor or the car park! Not a dig at the Nhs, I just know how overcrowded and underfunded/staffed they are...

so had midwife appointment this morning, baby has grown, which is great news but still measuring small, midwife has referred me for a new growth scan so just need to wait for that to come through and see what's what. Does feel like a lot of waiting though...

In other news, is third trimester morning sickness a thing? I was horribly sick this morning about three times (helpfully after the midwife appointment so couldn't ask her!), this happened last week as well. As a result, I went for a nap about midday and have only just woken up. What a waste of a beautiful day 😫

boxesoffrogs I get what you mean about sociology, SO often we have kids pick psych because they've been told its easy and that screws us and them over! So guess who has spent all day interviewing for 6th form?! I'm exhausted!

Third trimester sickess is a thing, baby pushes up on your stomach so everything is a lot more vulnerable to not staying down, especially if you were sick with 1st tri. My midwife was very matter of fact about it and said it just happens. Some women are still throwing up in labour. Praying that's not me!!

Arghhhh, I knew it was too good to be true! I haven't been sick at all so far until now. Bloody typical! Dp was making jokes about how it was my come uppance about being so smug re the non sickness previously, I could have quite cheerfully vomited on him, whilst simultaneously wetting myself a bit, oh the glamour! And I have been trying so hard with my pelvic floor exercises as well... it's only going to get worse after the birth, isn't it???
Don't get me started on the 'oh psych and socio are easy'. No they bloody well aren't!!! I get a lot of the btech kids picking it, and they just can't cope with all the content, plus the essay writing skills etc, bless them, so I feel your pain as then I get asked why they have got bad grades... not fair on me or then really...

Oh yeah we're exactly the same. I run health BTEC too and that's even worse now there's an exam componenet. You still get all the BTEC kids but doing similar work to A level and they can't cope. I can't wait until mat leave starts and we're not even back yet. Also ruined myself today, sciatica wasn't hurting at all but since I've sat down I can't move! Literally cannot walk. Gonna have to wait another hour for DH to get home so he can help me upstairs to change!

At least you weren't sick earlier on too, some women get it so bad and the whole way through. You're the same weeks as me right? Not too long to go. Ginger and lemon tea is helpful but my saviour was the anti sickness accupressure bands if it gets really bad.

You poor thing, that sounds horrible! I hope you have some form of biscuits or cake within easy reach...
bloody madness, isn't it, teaching? I am so over it already, it doesn't seem worth it at the mo to get attached to classes etc, seeing as I will be going soon... 13th October, bring it on! Only bad point is that I will have to give my year 13s over to the new person, they did really quite well considering at AS and the new girl is only an NQT and will take over from me being the only sociology teacher. I struggled with setting up the new department and acting as head of department (minus the pay I might add), after 8 years of teaching so I worry that she is going to struggle!
I am 31+5 today, so feel a bit behind lots of people here!!!

32+3 here and just feeling like I'm gestating quads.

I don't feel right, I feel queasy and my diet is back to its pre 12 week beige fest of - basically - toast.

We have to move house AGAIN in four days' time and I just want to howl I'm so tired. We are exceptionally lucky that DD is a good sleeper otherwise I'd have walked into the North Sea by now.

I just don't remember feeling this HUGE the first time round.

I'm just praying I don't need to pee before then!! I had a couple of really good days pain wise and obviously lulled myself into a false sense of security.
I know what you mean about the students, honestly I've never had year 12s I've loved so much and I'm gutted I won't be there for them next year. It looks like the 11s coming through are great kids too so after 4 years of teaching the same awful awful kids from GCSE through to A level I miss out of the good ones 😢

legend that made me laugh! 2nd babies are meant to be bigger right? (really useful comment, I know, I'll shut up now) How old is DD? I can't believe you have to move house, you have my sympathies there. I'm 31+1 and can't stand the thought of stripping the bed to change the sheets!

I think they tell you to go to a different hospital here too if they are full, but I'm not sure how they would know so far in advance unless they had a lot of ELCSs and inductions booked in. I guess that is why they recommend to call the labour ward before you go in (at least, that is how my hospital does it).

I felt really sick for a couple of days this week too, triggered by evil heartburn I think. It's died down now but I'm struggling to eat full meals as there just isn't room for them any more! So I end up snacking throughout the day and eating crap.

Hope you all have some nice things planned for the bank holiday weekend! Unfortunately I have to work on Monday but it is our wedding anniversary so hopefully will manage a fancy meal out somewhere.

Hey @Bobbiepin DD is 18months. She is a true delight and I love her to bits but she is embracing toddlerdom and all of its new fun things to do/pull down/dismantle/break/smash with gusto. It's so tiring.
So tiring
[weeps]

@boxesoffrogs and @Bobbiepin that has made me chuckle that people are picking psychology as an "easy" option!? I did it at A level, then uni and now work as a psychologist in the NHS... I wish it felt like an easy option!! Even at AS level I still remember having to memorise 20 odd studies and then the essays and theory stuff, not exactly light! 🙈

I'm also feeling quite irritable @boxes. I don't know if this is normal for everyone due to hormones or if it's because I have a tendency towards anxiety, but I feel like I want to pick a fight with DP half the time and he hasn't even done anything wrong. If anything he is being far too perfect and lovely.

I think my anxieties are creeping back again tho. Now my bump is getting much bigger I'm starting to feel repulsed by it, it doesn't feel like it's my baby, it feels like a deformity and I cry when I look at myself naked (never been this body conscious in my life).

I'm also really worried that we've got too many newborn clothes and not enough 0-3 and bigger ones. People bought us loads of extras when I'd already bought enough myself. Then there's the other worries about how I'll cope with being a stay at home mum after being a working professional for years, whether I'll get cabin fever or lose my sense of who I am. Whether I'll cope with the lack of sleep and whether mine and DP's relationship will change when the baby gets here.

Then there's the fact that I have no idea how to look after a baby. I've read everything I can and been to my antenatal classes, but still have no clue what I'm doing.

Sorry for being so negative, but I've been like this all week this week, keep crying whenever think about it.