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Connect with mums-to-be with similar due dates to share experiences and support.

May 2017 Special: the 'been there done that' thread!

93 replies

Rustler74 · 25/04/2017 12:09

Who has got the T-shirt? Please get sharing xxx

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
MrsJW15 · 10/05/2017 11:17

Thanks all for sharing these stories, the detail is very helpful for thinking about what might happen.

EsmesBees · 10/05/2017 12:38

Thanks for sharing ticky. Sounds like you are doing amazingly well recovering and dropping the top ups.

Tickyboovicki · 10/05/2017 16:04

@teainbed strangely it's quite satisfying to write it down, it kind of lets me take ownership seeing as I couldn't at the time!

@EsmesBees thanks! Having the whole night last night with no top ups felt amazing! Never mind how much better my boobs felt this morning 🙈

savagehk · 10/05/2017 16:12

And it's better to write it down asap before it fades - and fade it does!

ShiniBerry · 13/05/2017 19:34

Hi ladies, here's my birth story.

Disclaimer the birth was really intense and things did not go at all according to plan, and is not really what i'd call a positive birth story (lots of medical intervention) so for anyone wanting to stay away from non-positive birth stories, you'd probably want to stop reading now...

I was diagnosed with GD at about week 36 despite my 3 previous GTTs coming out normal and as bubs was measuring on the large side, I was to be induced at 39 weeks. About 3 days before the induction I had a membrane sweep which showed that I had already started dilating and my cervix was soft and also had the bloody show. The day before induction I had an acupuncture session to help bring on labour naturally.

On the day of the induction, I started having contractions and by the time the hospital called me and said there was a bed ready for me my contractions were about 5-6 minutes apart. In hospital the contractions really ramped up and I was fully into the active phase by the time I was wheeled into the labour unit. Also at this time the contractions started coming really intensely and close together that I barely had any time between them, about 6 to 7 contractions in 10 minutes. The midwives were asking me if I had been induced as it was similar to an induced labour response. Anyhow the contractions got so frequent with no time to rest between and so painful that entonox wasn't helping at all that I had to get an epidural. However the baby started going into distress as he wasn't getting any time to recover between contractions and went into bradycardia which was really scary because suddenly the room was full of people rushing around. I was given something to slow the contractions to allow the baby some time to recover, and even with this my contractions were coming pretty fast. Then it turned out I was going into tachycardia and spiking a temperature, and the baby went into bradycardia for a second time and was slow to recover at which the doctors who had stepped in and taken over said the baby has to be delivered right away. They were measuring the baby's oxygen levels by making small incisions on his head and collecting blood, and during one of these tests they found that the baby was in the wrong position, as in turned sideways instead of posterior. They had me push to try and move him into position but couldn't, and finally I was told the only option was to try an instrumental forceps delivery to turn the baby in to position and failing that a C section.

I was wheeled into the operating theatre and given a waist down epidural, an episiotomy was performed, and I was told to push on contractions which at this point were really far apart, then I was instructed to pant very gently and finally the baby was out, bawling at the top of his lungs and put on my chest at which both DH and I cried. I was more zombie-like and just so glad the baby was out, but DH was very emotional, he told me he had never been as scared and worried in his life and the moment when the baby came out it all just became too much to handle. I didn't get to have much skin to skin time as they had to check him and run tests immediately for signs of infection because of my fever spike during labour, and DH went with him. I was dozing in and out as the placenta was delivered and I was being stitched up and I lost about 800mL of blood.

The catheter put in during labour was removed the next morning, however as I wasn't passing urine they realised my bladder was retaining and drained it using an in and out catheter, and got at least 1.5L out. I was told i'd have to be catheterised if I didn't go on my own so managed to pass a bit, which improved over the next two days.

Baby and I had to stay in hospital for the duration of our 5 day antibiotic courses. Baby's test results also showed a high CRP level at 23 (usual range is 0.5-3) and they had to perform a lumbar puncture on the poor little guy at 2 days old to rule out meningitis or pneumonia. Thankfully all his test results came back normal, and over the course of the 5 days his CRP level dropped as well.

The day we were due to be discharged I was feeling a lot of pressure in my lower stomach and when trying to pee. I told the midwife I thought I had a UTI (i've never had one before so thought this was what it was supposed to feel like). She told me to drink lots and have someone bring me cranberry juice which I did. I later mentioned the abdominal pressure to another midwife who said she'd test my urine, and when it came back normal she asked me if i'd been passing urine to which I said very little. Another catheter was put in and this time over 2L collected in less than 20 minutes. It was decided that I was not fit to be discharged that night and would have to kept in overnight until a doctor could assess me. That night I had the worst back pain, it was so bad that I was literally writhing around in pain moaning and crying. I was given ibuprofen and paracetamol and then codeine, none of which did anything to dull the pain. Finally I was given morphine which finally took the edge off, but not for long. That night was the second longest night of my life (first obviously being the night in labour). The doctors who came to see me were saying things like kidney damage, and I was trying feed bubs through my pain and poor DH was at his wits end going from bubs to me looking after us both through the night. It turns out they drained my over extended bladder too quickly, causing the muscles holding my bladder to spasm causing the pain. I was discharged the next day, with the catheter and had to have it in for a week after which I went back to the hospital to have it removed and my bladder assessed. Turns out my bladder is still not functioning, so the catheter remains for another 10 days until re-assessment.

My recovery has been really difficult, thanks to the episiotomy, the use of forceps and the tough labour, i've been in constant pain and managing by regimented use of pain killers. Also with my bladder giving up and having to live with a catheter i've been so immobile and not able to do much to look after the baby. DH has been amazing despite never having had any experience with children much less newborns. He's become the most hands on father doing all the nappies and changes and waking up with me at night to hand me the baby for feeding and staying up to make sure I don't fall asleep and to put him back in his crib.

In the end going through this experience has made me more appreciative of what our bodies are capable of doing, of how bizarre and strong the female body is. Also just having this little person to love makes it completely worth it, and i'd probably do it all over again just for him!

Tickyboovicki · 13/05/2017 19:57

@ShiniBerry wow well done you! Certainly sounds like your little one made quite the entrance into the world. Glad to hear you are both home, and your husband sounds like he's being amazing so well done him too. Fingers crossed your back up and feeling yourself soon xx

teainbed · 13/05/2017 19:59

Goodness @ShiniBerry you've been through the wringer haven't you? I felt a bit weepy reading that. Well done to DH for getting stuck in though. You will heal, and things will continue to improve. Flowers

EsmesBees · 13/05/2017 20:01

Thank you for sharing Shini. You sound like you've been incredibly strong.

Rustler74 · 13/05/2017 20:14

Thank you for sharing @ShiniBerry you sound like a very strong lady! Also hats off to the OH for being so hands on despite being totally overwhelmed x
You tell the story so very well x hoping it keeps going in the right direction and you can start enjoying your family to the full FlowersFlowersFlowers

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crazyzooo · 13/05/2017 20:21

@shinyberry I am so sorry you've had such a crap time!! Glad to hear your DH Is being so good. I had a pretty horrific birth too (I am holding off posting but may do so with a disclaimer!) and the recovery (both mentally and physically) is taking time, though I am in much less pain than you! The shiny new human does make it all worth it though (hormones are wonderful things!!). You've been incredibly strong. Hopefully as you've had your fair share, the rest of your recovery will be uneventful! 💐💐

Ghostonthedancefloor · 13/05/2017 22:24

Shiniberry Flowers

CoxsOrangePippin · 13/05/2017 23:07

Thinking of you shini and sending you good vibes for healing

jennymac31 · 14/05/2017 10:08

Wow tickyboovicki & shiniberry - the female body really is an amazing piece of work.

Although little name's birth had a bit of a dramatic end, I'm glad we both home safe & sound. So here goes my birth story;

Thursday 11th may 3.30am - started to feel bh but just had a niggling feeling it might be something more so stayed in bed to assess situation.

4.00am - bh getting stronger so took some paracetamol. 'bloody' show started to appear.

6.00am - definitely started to suspect contractions as they were 5 mins apart but were not consistent in regards to length of time (some lasting 30secs whilst others lasting 50 etc). Mucus discharge from show was still present.

8.00am - rang delivery suite and explained contractions and bloody show (which now had brown/dark green tinge). They advised I stay home and wait for contractions to be more consistent.

9.00am - rang delivery suite as contractions were now every 3 mins each lasting 45 secs. Again they told me to stay at home but after my last birth experience I asked if I could come in to be assessed.

So glad I went in, as assessment showed that although cervix was closed there was green mucus so I either had an infection or baby had already pooed in the womb. They kept me in to check things over with a view of sending me home but it was becoming clear that I wasn't going to be going anywhere for a while.

Had to lie sideways when hooked up to ctg machine as baby didn't like it when I was on my back. By 3.30pm they decided they would induce me as baby's heartbeat kept dipping so they broke my waters (barely anything came out - as I suspect they had actually hours beforehand). Was given hormone drip at 5.30pm to kick-start things.

By 6.30pm pain was getting unbearable and had gas & air. Definitely felt like I could push and asked if I could go on my back but midwife said that baby's heartbeat was more comfortable when on my side.

By 8.30pm I had enough and went on my back as I knew baby was pretty much here. Nate shot out at 8.36pm but he was unresponsive. Barely had any skin-to-skin before he was whisked away. I could hear him whimpering but he was struggling to breathe as he had swallowed a lot of meconium & they couldn't seem to clear his airways. He was taken to nicu whilst my stitching was seen to. Had catheter put inside afterwards.

Could see that the midwife was being told off for not allowing me to go on my back sooner to get baby out quicker. However dh and I were getting frustrated as we asked for an update on baby and no one seemed that bothered. I would have kicked up more of a fuss if I wasn't so tired.

We weren't given any news until 2.30am when we're told that his condition has improved so he can stay with me in the ward. They brought him down at 3.30am and then tried to breast feed/hand express but nothing was coming out. He hadn't been fed when in nicu so ended up bottle feeding. Still not having any luck with the breast but am just happy he's here.

When he first arrived I tried not to think of the worst but when dh hugged me and I could feel him shaking for dear life trying not to break down I knew we might be in for a rough ride. Thankfully we are home and little nate is resting on dh's belly.

May 2017 Special: the 'been there done that' thread!
Rustler74 · 14/05/2017 10:43

Wow @jennymac31 glad you insisted on going in. So pleased your little stunning boy is doing well and you've been discharged home now. He's looking adorable on dad's belly!

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teainbed · 14/05/2017 11:02

Wow what an entrance @jennymac31 ! Also a bit surprised they wanted you to stay at home with green mucus and contracting every 3 minutes. Beautiful pictures, hope you're feeling ok.

Tickyboovicki · 14/05/2017 11:28

@jennymac31 wow well done you! Definitely so unnerving when you don't feel like you know what's going on, glad your all ok now though!
We had bottles & formula in hospital after a similar issue with meconium too. I really struggled with breastfeeding but cracked it in the end, and we're getting there now! Fingers crossed you make it work howevers best for you and your gorgeous baby boy, he'll be perfect as long as he's fed!
Really pleased your all home and happy 🙂

WishIWasSleeping · 14/05/2017 16:30

Wow Shini - that's quite a event!
Glad to hear you're on the road to your new normality. Flowers
Jenny - For you too - Flowers Good job you insisted. It's clearly good to trust your instincts. Pleased you're both home safe and recovering well now.

Although I think you might both need CakeBrew instead!! Grin

Autumnsweater · 14/05/2017 17:09

Thanks for sharing everyone, good and bad bits, find real life stories really help picture all scenarios for me. Well done you all sound like you've done amazing and dealt with whatever has been thrown your way.

Sipperskipper · 14/05/2017 17:13

I second autumn - thank you for sharing everyone.

1004Rise · 15/05/2017 12:01

This is less of a birth story and more the decision making process/thoughts I had after going from Green pathway to Red in what felt like 10 seconds flat. It's long!!

Thursday morning (39 +1) we visited the hospital because we moved area for what we thought was a tick box exercise, had growth scan (asked sonographer to tell us when to look away so we didn't spoil the surprise), took bloods etc etc.

Spoke to doctor and midwife after scan, as they were concerned that baby was measuring by scan at close to 4.5 kg which for me was well over the 95th centile.

To cut a long story short this meant no giving birth in the MLU, while it may have been possible to labour in the MLU if I had gone into labour on my own, the giving birth part would need to have happened on the labour ward with medical team as the concern was shoulder dystocia. Doctor also said they would prefer to have an epidural in because in case I needed help to deliver in addition to very probably needing an episiotomy.

The doctor examined me to check baby's engagement and see if she could have done a sweep. Baby wasn't engaged at all, so no sweep and doctor explained that for her this was an additional concern as for a first baby she would expect the head to be at least partly engaged and may be a sign that baby wasn't going to engage on their own. This added an additional question for her around whether induction would be successful.

Given the fact that I had been green all the way to this point we hadn't looked into c-sections at all and only into inductions to the point I knew I didn't want to go down that route just because I was x days past my EDD.

After discussions with the doctor we agreed to be booked in for an induction on Friday morning which would give us time to go away and process our options and then be able to talk to the doctor at the hospital again. (We is me and DH who was awesome at talking all this through and being another pair of ears)

We spent most of Thursday afternoon going round in circles over what to do and I'm lucky to have a cousin who is a midwife and who has been really good through my pregnancy with the number of daft questions that I've asked. So I also talked it through with her. Which was really good because she kept reminding me that everything was my choice and whatever o chose was right for me and baby. Her advice was to look at the birth "wish list" I had and work out what option stayed as true to that as possible, but to also consider how I'd feel if I had a section and the baby was much smaller.

Essentially I chose to have a C-Section because I felt like it still gave me control (I am a control enthusiast!) over over the situation. My birth plan started with "give birth in the MLU and I don't want to be induced" everything about the induction process (having waters broken, constant monitoring -even wireless- etc) was everything I didn't want and all induction meant to me was an increasing cycle anxiety. My biggest fear was that I'd start the induction process, it would take ages to work then I'd get so far but get stuck for whatever reason and end up with a section anyway in an emergency situation. As soon as I'd made the decision I felt 100 times better.

I arrived at the hospital on Friday morning and told the midwife that I didn't want the induction (in tears) she was lovely and again once I'd said it I relaxed. I'd also found hypnobirthing c-section tracks on iTunes which we used while we were waiting.

Because I wasn't booked, I was essentially waiting for a gap in the schedule and one that wasn't filled by an emergency. Essentially on Friday no-one else's babies did what they were supposed to do and we got bumped and bumped and bumped down the queue... I spoke to 2 anaesthetists as we were next on the list twice, then at 8pm the Doctor we'd seen in the morning to explain everything came to tell us that we were calling it a day and there was no point starving me any more. I've never met so many people who apologised for everything so many times they were all so nice (crazy but in a good way) I was put in a private room, we were both fed and DH went home so we both got a decent sleep and for us to try again on Saturday.

Saturday morning we went down to recovery at about 10 am and you could tell straight away it was a much calmer morning. Again everyone was lovely, 3rd anaesthetist was as mad as a box of frogs and explained everything that would happen again and we walked into theatre at about 11 am.

Theatre is a scary place, I've never been somewhere so bright and so busy (and that was without the bright lights on) the nurse that took me through warned me but it still took me by surprise. The worst bit was getting the spinal, DH kept talking to me and we used the hypnobirthing breathing that we'd been practicing, there is no way I would have been able to stay still enough otherwise. How anyone gets an epidural mid-labour amazes me!

The operation itself was really quick, she was out within about 10 mins, they dropped the screen to let us see her then she was off to get weighed and rubbed down and have her vitamin K (which she didn't like) then DH held her til I was ready. I was getting a running commentary of what was happening with the baby from the anaesthetist until DH came back over with her. I couldn't really do anything other than stroke her cheek, but the anaesthetist kept checking over the screen and told me when they were at skin level (definitely mad as a box of frogs!) Once I was stitched up, baby went in her cot DH went to get changed and I was slid over onto the bed (most bizarre situation when they put a bed beside you and your head thinks slide over and your body doesn't move) then they took off my gown and gave me baby so I could do skin to skin. Midwife helped me position her and she was feeding within a minute of being in recovery.

Baby was 3.79kg so smaller than the 4.44kg predicted by the scan but still on the 93rd Centile according to my growth chart. I don't know if I would have been able to deliver her on my own if we'd waited for me to go into labour by myself but I don't feel that matters. I do know I wouldn't have coped well with the induction process so that decision was the right one for me. I have a beautiful baby girl, and we're both healthy and that's all that matters.

May 2017 Special: the 'been there done that' thread!
1004Rise · 15/05/2017 12:09

Wow @jennymac31 mummy's instincts are important!! Well done you FlowersBrewCake

MrsJW15 · 15/05/2017 14:32

Gorgeous baby @1004Rise! That sounds tough but I'm glad that you feel like you made the right decision for you.

Rustler74 · 15/05/2017 22:41

Well done @1004Rise and well written story! Striking difference between estimates weight and eventual weight!

I'm glad you had the birth that seemed right x

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Autumnsweater · 16/05/2017 06:14

Thanks for sharing @1004Rise! Love the "control enthusiast" description Grin, I totally get it. Gorgeous photo!!!

Tickyboovicki · 16/05/2017 08:21

@1004Rise sounds like the perfect decision if you are all here and healthy! Glad you felt in control and had a good experience.
I'm sure it's always meant to deviate from our 'plans', prepares us for the rest of being a mum!

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