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Connect with mums-to-be with similar due dates to share experiences and support.

Any IVF advice?

17 replies

sunshinedays · 05/03/2007 13:54

CONGRATULATIONS on graduating to the Ante-natal clubs - I'm having to join remedial classes in the hope I may one day join you! (me: 37 ttc 3yrs - unexplained infertility)

Are any of you IVF success stories - if so PLEASE can you pass on any advice or tips (from how to relax (!) through to diet/supplements) plus any insights into what to really expect.

with thanks
Sx

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
mmk · 05/03/2007 16:56

Hi!

I'll try not to lecture but here are my top 10 tips

Note- do not fret! almost anything can be done these days, if you know where to go! How old are you?

  1. contact foresight, get your hair tested and get on a custom built vitamin programme. Even if that doesn't get you pregnant, something will, and you'll want to prevent m'c etc.

2.if you have had one set of tests, check to see if they have checked your hormones on the exact length of your cycle, and not on a 28 day cycle if yours is not!
If anyone says you need a tube checking scan, smack them on the head and run! It is agony and doesn't tell you much.

  1. forget relaxing, you can't! Cortisone is released when you worry and that affects your eggs. You can't stop fretting, so do research instead, it will stop you frettng too much!
  1. Read about sponateous ovulation, ferning and lunar cycling all on the websites.
  1. Get DH sperm checked at least twice. If they say it is just fine, get test results and check them out-there are load of sites on the internet. If it is too expensive, get yourself a testing kit from the internet.
  1. If you are having IVF, ask clinics for live birth rates, not pregnancy rates. Don't ask clinics here for their advice on your situation, they won't give it without a £280 consultation fee. Email a clinic abroad. I'll tell you the good ones if you need them
  1. If you are over 40 (personal opinon) forget IVF and start looking at other options.
  1. Get on some clinic waiting lists, and get on free NHS IVF list. If you don't need it fine, but if you do, you don't want to find that a waiting list is 5 years long!
  1. If you decide on IVF, check out ISIDA clinic in Kiev. I could go on about how wonderful this place is all day! Two very lucky visits here. There is also a chat group for people going there, and what happens afterwards. Sucess rates are very high, so don't go unless you are ready for a baby!
  1. Think about how far you will go to acheive your dream.
Pruni · 05/03/2007 17:04

Message withdrawn

mmk · 05/03/2007 17:07

I'm going home now, and my computer at home is broken, so can't reply until tomorrow morning

sunshinedays · 05/03/2007 17:09

Wow - thanks!

So many questions..... here's a start:

I am 37 (38 by the time we do IVF) - we ae having one NHS funded round in May/June.

Love the advice about relaxing - I get told soo often Just relax - it'll happen. Yeah, right!

Did you drink bucket loads of milk & water - do you think it helps?

Did the drugs send you loopy... and was it painful?

OP posts:
mmk · 05/03/2007 17:09

Yes, our story is somewhat longer than most, it took us 12 years, at least 8 of which were wasted!
I'm much wiser now, for most people, it is easier than it was for us.

mmk · 05/03/2007 17:14

In my opinion first off, 38 is a good young age for IVF!

So many questions..... here's a start:

I am 37 (38 by the time we do IVF) - we ae having one NHS funded round in May/June. Ask how many embryos they will transfer, check their policy, and start thinking about how many you would like.
Relaxing, yeah well we tried that for 2 years, and WASTED valuble time. If all is well on both sides, relaxing might work,but it doesn't work fore everyone!

No, I didn't drink any extra water or milk. There is a theory that drinking water helps though.

The drugs didn't send me loopy, and some of the procedure is painful, but not really much. I know some people do suffer a lot though.

sunshinedays · 05/03/2007 17:17

I'd like to transfer 2... pref at blastocyst stage... but DH is a little concerned about possibility of twins - how many did you go for?

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mmk · 06/03/2007 09:12

Well (shocking) but the first time, we went for 5 embies transferred, because the material we were working with was not so good. However, the second time, we only had 2 embies transferred. Each time we ended up with one baby, or rather one and one on the way!

Our case isn't really relevant to yours, since we had to go much further than usual IVF.

I think you are very right to be concerned about twins. You have to evaluate which would be worse for you, twins or nothing. 3 embies used to be common, but because people are generally younger now when undergoing IVF, chances of sucess are higher. You are lucky being so young, your outlook is much brighter, and even if it doesn't work, you have plenty of time to consider what to do next.

fionaann · 06/03/2007 10:57

Hi

I agree that 37/38 is a good age. I am 39 and currently 16 weeks pregnant following first time IVF in November. We were told we would be good candidates as I conceived naturally in October 05 but had a missed miscarriage in December and apparently I had quite a few follicles. I responded well to the drugs which stimulate ovulation but they only get 4 eggs of which only 1 fertilised - yet it still worked. As they told me at the time (but which I didn't believe) you only need one good egg to fertilise for it to work. This has also happened to a number of my friends.

I would recommend joining a support group. I joined the Mind Body Group at the Bridge Centre in London Bridge www.thebridgecentre.co.uk/. I would really recommend this group for support and advice from ten others going through similar things. The leader goes through relaxation techniques - some of which work, some don't. The best thing is being able to ask advice of others who have been through or are going through the same procedures. This of course also means that you will be with a variety of women - some who are thinking of IVF, some who have been through it several times and some who are going through egg donation. I learnt that even though we were having to pay for IVF you can sometimes get the drugs you need on the NHS through your GP - saving us about £1,000. The Mind Body course lasts for 10 weeks and costs £400. Of 11 in the group, 4 are now pregnant.

The last thing I would say is, if you can, try and cut back on any other stress if at all possible. It can be like a second job finding out all you can about where to have IVF and all the tips and advice. Easier said than done I know but if you can take things a bit easier at work, cut back to part-time if at all possible, I think it probably helps. You are a good age now but from now til 40 or so is still a small window of opportunity so best to do all you can to maximise your chances during this time.
All the best.

Fiona

sunshinedays · 06/03/2007 15:22

Thanks both of you - I've started to look into local relaxation courses - great idea!

I'm heartened to read of your disbelief! Although I do, of course, HOPE for a positive outcome, I feel the likelihood is pretty slim. Secretly I've been beating myself up on this - as "positive visualistion" is supposed to be more useful that harsh realism..... I so want to be a mum but am trying to accept it may not come to me.

OP posts:
mmk · 06/03/2007 15:49

Sunshine

You are very wise to hope for a positive outcome an go with the positive thinking, and prepare for it not working, you've got every angle covered! I must say though, you are in the younger end of the scale, where sucess is more likely.

Its good to do all the visualisation etc, and relaxing, but good to plan ahead too. I wasted years and years on positive thinking and alternative therapies! The general opinion was I was just getting too worked up about it.
However, years later, when it was far too late, I found the most likely reason for not falling pregnant, and was so glad I followed my instinct and went with the treatment. So, as I suspected, no amount of positive thinking or relaxing would have helped our case! I don't mean that to sound negative, but hope you see what I mean. Because you fell pregnant before, your case is different to mine.

mmk · 06/03/2007 16:24

by the way sunshine, which clinic are you going to?

You can really help the outcome if you and dh have the foresight vitamin programme in advance. You can checkout the website. www.foresight-preconception.org.uk/

The chief chick is Nim Barnes, who is very direct. If ever you get her on the phone, don't let her go! She is much in demand!

sunshinedays · 06/03/2007 16:41

I'm at Hammersmith Hosp.

I'm looking into foresight now.

By the way you mentioned zinc elsewhere .... did you take pretty high doses? Was this as a result of foresight advice?

OP posts:
mmk · 07/03/2007 09:01

Glad to hear you are looking at Foresight. Yes, all my vitamin and mineral advice came from them. There is a mountain of advice. Some is provable, such as the fact that we have copper pipes means we have high levels of copper in our hair samples (which we sent to them to be tested.
I took only the dose of zinc they recommended, I don't remember it being particulary high.

I don't agree that everyone can get pregnant from vitamins alone though, as they suggest. Unexplained infertility can often mean that there is something wrong which clincs can't guess at (as in our case) and if we just hoped to get pregnant by vitamins etc, I would be childless now! It is good to have a back up plan. However, there is no doubt that vitamins can help you get pregnant and stay pregnant, since it means that they egg and sperm, and therefore the embryos are the best they can be.

kiteflying · 07/03/2007 13:19

Sunshinedays, I was at the Hammersmith in November/December and am now fifteen weeks pregnant with my first. They are an excellent clinic. Such a contrast to the private clinic that gave me no baby and endless neuroses about leaving it too late in July (no need to name them here) You will probably find that the clinic doctors are against you waiting till blastocyst stage for transfer. I suggested this and was told that medical thinking had moved on since the books I had been reading were published and that it is now thought that the best place for the embryo to develop is in the womb as the most natural place. We only had three eggs and only one then fertilised, but were assured that one good embryo is all you need. Well, we took home a photo of our four cell embryo and focussed lots of love in that direction. I realise it sounds a bit out there but I do think it is important to be very loving with each other and love those four cells to bits if you can be hopeful enough to do this.

My advice in the lead up would be, guess, try to eliminate every other source of stress from your life as IVF related stress is enough and you can't NOT be stressed about IVF. It's impossible. I was so depressed by our failed private cycle and the attitude of the consultants that I guess I accidentally sucked all the energy out of every other aspect of my life - I do not recommend depression as a preparatory measure of course. However, I definitely "wound down" efforts at work which I think IS a good move. Because we had been told IVF was a no go by the hated clinic (and to "get over it"), we upped our efforts to try and magically open my faulty tube by diet and meditation, and this I think did help in preparing for IVF. Zita West is very good if you want to follow this.

By the time we came to the Hammersmith in November, we both had not smoked a cigarette for over two years, had not consumed any alcohol or caffeine for almost twelve months, had not eaten any junk food for almost six months, had not eaten any processed food, or anything with preservative or E numbers for the same period, had very little red meat in our diets and no dairy, drank a litre and a half of water each a day, and were exercising outdoors every weekend and making sure we did really nice things for ourselves so we were "welcoming" any potential baby into as good a home as we could imagine for it. We also switched all our cleaning products for non-phospate (Ecover has a range of everything so it is quite easy to do this) and my boyfriend who is a builder tried to keep out of the way when all the painting and other strong solvents were being used. It sounds very regimented but in fact it just becomes a lifestyle thing - and it is great preparation for pregnancy, although I had to reverse tracks on the dairy thing of course. I could not get my partner to do the yoga and meditation but I did and got a lot of calm out of it, which saw me through the depression and the next IVF cycle, and through the nail biting two weeks until the BFP.

I hope this is helpful. I will probably think of something else as soon as I post, but that's par for the course.
The other important thing is to really, really trust in the advice you are getting from your clinic - you are lucky in the Hammersmith, but it does help to try and know as much about the process as you can ahead of time so nothing is frightening. For example, I had a problem with poor response to the stimulating drugs in my first and miserable cycle. The consultants were quick to point to ovarian reserve and ipso facto you are too old, but I was convinced by what I had read that I would do better on a shorter protocol and was lucky that I knew enough to suggest this to the doctors at the Hammersmith in our induction interviews. I think once I felt listened to and they actioned the information I gave them, my confidence levels in my care skyrocketed and this may have contributed to the level of calm I maintained through that cycle.

You might find it useful to have a recent FSH level reading as well. If you can get it in your work-up, it is handy to have a reading from more than one month, but I have never known anyone who has managed this and mine was really old when I finally started my Hammersmith cycle. We had two different analyses done on my partner's side as well, to see if his motility levels changed once it had been six months since giving up alcohol (they did!).

kiteflying · 07/03/2007 13:22

I knew I would leave something out - as well as all the things I left out of our diet, we ate green, green, green and fish and as much organic as we could afford. And both took multivitamins (mine was pregnacare) after reading the Foresight website (we did not actually do the course)

Sunshinedays · 07/03/2007 15:19

Thank you so much for taking the time to write - it means a lot.
Please continue to add any thoughts and insights if any pop up - they are being thoroughly absorbed!

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