ANTENATAL PROCESS HELL

[FedUPFTMum]

Hi everyone I'm 36 weeks and the worst part of my pregnancy has been the healthcare. As I'm a first time mom who seems to be late on everything the last thing i needed was for my healthcare to add to my frustration.

I just need a consensus, is it typical to have to ring up and make all appointments yourself (guessing which are gp or midwife), chase after midwives for antenatal classes, not get offered some have to pay for NCT ones, get swapped midwife teams and get told you can't book where you want to give birth (other than indicate a hospital preference)

Why wouldn't you have to make the appointments yourself?

All sounds pretty typical and reasonable to me. Re the birth you can usually choose midwife led / home / consultant led but it's health dependent and resources dependent.

I had the same 3 midwives or maybe 4 not sure for any appointments at the GP they did turn about but otherwise it was just whoever was available for scans / checks and of course the birth.

Antenatal classes - bit pointless imo. Went to 2, learnt nothing.

All of what you've mentioned sounds typical. My experience...

Antenatal classes aren't mandatory so that's purely choice which you go for-midwife can help with info on them but that's about it. I didn't go to any.

I mainly had two midwives I saw and would have found it hard being swapped as I really liked the relationship with them.

Appointments: it said in a generic booklet I had (or perhaps on surgery website) which appointments were with midwife or doctor and at how many weeks. I tended to ask midwife when to book next one in at each appointment.

Where you give birth is up to you unless there's a medical reason or resource shortage (usually). My preference was home birth for example but due to premature labour, had to go to nearest hospital. You can't book because no one knows where or when it'll actually happen! Mostly people get where they choose though.

Good luck! I had a 2 week old by 36 weeks-my advice is pack a bag of you haven't already

I saw a different midwife each time, and wasted hours of my life in a waiting room to be told things like "you're not diabetic" and "keep taking your medications as normal" that did feel like a collosal waste of my time.

Tbf, I was always told at the end of each appointment who to book the next one with and when.

Bit if a fuck up on discharge, but can't win them all.

thank you @clockmakersue!! and @Haudyerwheesht I just didn't know what to expect.That makes sense about the when and where re the Birth booking!!

Re-appointments the stuff I saw online didn't specify it kept saying GP or midwife so I had to ask every time I went to book an appointment they only let me book up to 2 at a time which was which.

re: Midwife, I've had a different midwife each appointment. I've gone through 6 (which is the whole team) I was told yesterday that a new team was taking over my post code, cue new rota of midwives I want to cry!!! I just noticed tonight my appointment list says my next appointment is with a health visitor?? I called my new team every 15 mins between 9 and 1 today no one picked up.

I haven't packed my bag!! I guess i now know what i'll be doing with my weekend. Thank you, i feel less panties in a bunch!!

Glad it was helpful. The health visitor pre birth visit I actually quite liked (thought I wouldn't!) as she had a bit more time for me to ask questions etc and she gave some good breast feeding tips. It's entirely optional to use the health visitor service though.

I'd be feeling the same about a midwife change but dont worry too much-you've already seen loads so a few more will add to the party Can you leave a message on an answering machine for a call back? I like everything organised too so it'll be frustrating but remember, you're allowed to feel frustrated and anxious just dot let it spoil your enjoyment of the last few weeks of pregnancy. It's too hot to get flustered!

I think sometimes everything could be clearer and it can be forgotten that we can get overwhelmed and feel like we don't know how to navigate the whole antenatal process!

Meeting your HV before the birth is a new initiative to make the transition from MW to HV care easier for you (familiar faces and all that). It isn't really antenatal care, more setting the scene for your postnatal care.

No there wasn't a vmail for the midwives unit, that was part of my annoyance, i ended up calling triage they were quite helpful. About the HV do they just pop round unannounced? Do I have to schedule something? gosh I must say thank you really to everyone, i'm really finding this process helpful and reassuring :)

Here the health visiting team sent a letter about the first meeting time and if it didn't suit, a number to call to change it. After the baby was born, our hv called to ask if she could come over and we arranged a time together then subsequent visits we booked in before she left. I saw ours a fair bit because our son had jaundice and I wanted an expert eye to check it was improving!

ah i haven't had any word, perhaps i'll call the community midwives help line or the surgery and find out what's going on with that. @ClockMakerSue

I would-I called and asked so many questions during my pregnancy and after and they were always polite and friendly. A quick question and getting things organised made me relax and that was better than getting stressed about it! I hope if I have another, I'll remember what happens when but I bet I'm the same again!

I live in South London and I don't make my own appointments. They are made for me at the end of each appointment.

None are with the GP, just midwives and consultants. My GP has written me about vaccinations to let me know they offer whopping cough etc.

I have also been allowed to choose my hospital (via self referral).

I was offered antenatal classes by my midwife and after I told my MW that I had hip pain, I immediately go referred for physio.

My point is, while your treatment might be typical, its not in my opinion very good and the NHS does offer better in certain areas.

Sounds ducking awful. You don't have a choice where you give birth. Wow that's shit. Midwifery is about being an advocate for women not bossing them about telling them where they can and can't give birth. Would put that midwife in her place, stupid cow