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3 replies

DanielSan · 10/11/2014 12:32

Hi, am not sure if I'm posting in the right thread, let me know if I need to move elsewhere.

Am 38 weeks pregnant with DS2 today, have had some mental health issues and some physical problems during the pregnancy. Basically I have a really bad back (slipped disc) and SPD.I'm seeing a counsellor at the moment, and have been for the last 8 weeks or so because of trauma in my last labour and memories of sexual abuse that have come out into the open since my last labour. I've been scheduled for a c-section next week.

My DH has been so amazing and supportive, reminds me why I married him, actually! He's just been wonderful. He's such a grounded and together person, that I forget he's had his own difficulties from when he was a child (his dad was a severe alcoholic, which peaked at the time his mum was diagnosed with cancer). His Dad has been dry for 5 years now, however, last Friday his mum (who I love dearly, and is an amazing woman) was diagnosed with stage 3 esophageal (sp) cancer. He's been quite stoical about it, and I've been trying to listen when he wants to talk, and be there for him.

I'm worried that my problems and the c section will put a huge strain on him and his family (my family too), as I'll need help after the section, but his Mum needs him more at the moment. My Mum is also ill, and my sister is also pregnant. I don't know what to do to make this easier or better for the people I love, and I think I'm putting myself over everybody else, including DH, who has been so supportive for me, and now needs someone to help him. I just don't know what to do for the best and how to help. Any advice would be gratefully appreciated.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
DanielSan · 12/11/2014 20:44

Hello? x

OP posts:
SeptemberBabies · 12/11/2014 20:49

How old is DC1?

Are there school yard Mums who could help with the school run?

If pre-school age, could DC1 go into childcare for a few weeks?

allchatnicknamesgone · 24/11/2014 17:40

Could you speak to your doctor and see if you can receive more help after c-section from social services maybe? I assume you are unable to pay for paid help. Maternity nanny type person?
Or Xmas holidays approaching. Maybe you could pay a student a little to come and help you daily? Some people do recover quite quickly from c-section also.

Good luck to you and husband

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