February 2014. Bodystockings at the ready. We make pregnancy sexy.

[DawnOfTheDee]

Ok we don't. We're sick a lot, cry at adverts, moan about back/hip pain and if we got a quid for each new stretchmark generated we could all give up work and employ a nanny.

In fact if you know any teenagers feel free to show them our threads...we are the most effective contraceptive since sliced bread don't ask.

Ladies...as you were....

Baby kicks now waking me up in the night. Better that than the deadly ninja assassin calf cramps of late I suppose.

Also - Had bath with DH earlier and he was accurately able to detect the kicks without looking or touching on account of the shockwaves being sent through the water! Apparently he was picking them up with his leg hairs... Someone else please try this!

Time for 4.30am tea and leftover frangipani tart in bed feast. Starving.

Shrops I now can't stop giggling at your post which has woken DH up. (Is anyone else getting the flip side of the excessive hormonal crying? Hysterical uncontrollable fits of laughter over things I'd normally be able to keep a lid on. There's an ad on telly for an Iceland documentary where the bloke says 'did we test for horse?' Which I misheard as 'dignitas for whores' and then couldn't stop laughing so hard for about half an hour, I even laugh weed a bit. Not that funny but I've set myself off again now I just had to get up as it was like trying to control the giggles in church.

vix so sorry to hear about your sister. Thinking of you.

petty great news!

shrops don't have an epidural. Just have gas and air. That way you can be sure you will not give a damn about anything apart from getting the baby out. With an epidural you retain a sense of normality and more awareness of what's going on. (embarrassment) I've had one with and one without and the one without was definitely better. Hoping to just have g&a again this time.
Just have

Hello whoput

Morning poppy!

shrops, you honestly won't care. By the time it happened to me I'd already had two midwives rummaging around trying to break my waters after discussing who had the longest fingers and was therefore the most suited to the tricky task. Dignity had long since been discarded.
I remember feeling like I had done a poo so I told the trainee doctor. She looked like a teenager, especially when she excitedly told me that I was wrong, that I had mistaken labour for pooing myself. I told her to check and her face went grey. She looked traumatised and told the midwife who just shrugged and told her to clean it up. Poor girl. My situation should have been really embarrassing but I had far more stressful things to think about than a bit of poo.
Oh, if they ask if a trainee doctor can assist, the answer is always 'NO.' She ended up trying to pull my placenta out by the cord which caused weeks of problems.

I wonder if she's still in the medical profession after that trauma...

I think winter means that she's not married etc and is going to be a single mummy like me!
Can we not mention my job pls shrops... It was MEANT to be a secret! And you plaster it all over the bloody internet
I am also petrified of tearing...not so arsed about pooing (I'm constipated anyway so if I actually poo it will be a miracle) I don't want to ruin my fanjo

Shropshire. I did both (poo and 2nd deg tear) and was totally unaware of both. The midwives are very quick to sort the former out (and fully expect it to happen) and the latter just didn't register with me at all. You'd think it would be awful but I just didn't feel it. I was so shocked when they said I needed stitches.

The stitches were hell though because I had a bitch dr come in who didn't give me enough local anaesthetic (injections in the perineum are F.U.N too I can tell you) and so I felt every stitch. I screamed to her that it was hurting and she said 'after what you've been through this is nothing just be quiet and use the gas and air'. I felt so powerless and weak I just had to deal with it. This time I will be so much feistier.

Morning all, had ninja leg cramps thurs night and last night insomnia from 2-4am. DH was breathing far too loudly for me to return to sleep so decamped to spare room.

whoput you amaze me - my hairy lump of a DH plus preggo me will deffo not fit into a bath together - not with water anyway! Wonderful you felt kicks though. I may try solo bath this weekend.

Yes to the emotional rollercoaster! A friend of mine gave birth this week and I've found out another has had a BFP. Both of those announcements have set me off blubbing. Plus whilst in Rome I managed to walk around the cistene chapel very respectfully holding in the worlds biggest fart which then erupted as soon as I exited the holy chapel (but was in a museum bit). DH and I were in hysterics. Vatican museum people were a little

Shrops I am going to have to go against the grain here and be honest. I did really care about the poo thing even when I was in labour and in agony. I also loose the ability to wee when in labour, I just can't push the wee out. Then what ends up happening is when I move around I wet myself and not just a little bit.

I remember crying saying to my husband "oh no I have weed on the floor, how disgusting oh no" then locking myself in the hospital toilet in shame crying. My husband tried to be nice and kept telling me it was just my waters. but I assured him it was wee and I was disgusting 'sob sob'. That memory makes me laugh now, but at the time I was mortified. Midwife had to come and talk me out of the toilet and put a temporary Cathator in to get all the wee out.

As for the poo, there was no way on this earth I was going to be pooing myself. Therefore, I didn't eat all through labour and only had ice cubes. As my labours lasted for days this was a bit stupid but I felt sick anyway. But I was determined that I was not going to poo and it was on my mind a lot during labour. I must just be really vain or odd as I know most just say its the last thing you care about. But it had been a huge thing on my mind i did not want to give birth to my baby in the aroma of my own poo.

On the other hand, when I was 13 I watched my little sister being born. Supposedly my mum pooed whilst pushing but I didn't even notice at all the midwives must have whipped it away double quick.

I am sleeping mostly on my left side. In the night I wake up in agony my hip is so sore and all the way down my leg too. Is anyone else having this? Is it just because I am getting heavier? But I never experienced this with either of my pregnancies before.

Fortunately still being WEEKS away from 3rd trimester I can remain in denial about poo and stitches for a little longer.

Even if you have a section, you may not be able to escape the uncontrollable wee!

I had a cathetor which you'll have to have with a section and the midwives didn't empty the wee bag often enough, and it started overflowing and all my wee went all over the floor in the ward. So that wasn't great! I also went for a shower maybe 24 hours after the section and it was the first time I'd walked and got out of bed so a midwife came with me. Then she left me to it and I almost passed out as I hadn't stood in so long and had to pull the emergency cord for the midwife to find me naked and slumped. Don't let anyone leave you so soon after a section!

I get embarassed easily but whichever way your baby comes out, they have to see you with your legs open so you just have to get on with it. At least we get a baby at the end of it, the midwives just get the lovely views (and poos!).

Just catching up...so sorry to hear your news Vix, lots of virtual hugs xx

Massive YES to uncontrollable laughing/sobbing, often together....my god my DH thinks I'm a right weirdo for hysterically laughing at random unfunny stuff!

Had my flu jab and my arm is now really red all the way round to my tricep...bit weird but doesn't hurt. Just looks like I've been in a car accident

24+0

Shropshire I can safely say I didn't care about pooing, tearing etc by the end. To this day I have no idea if I pooed as had epidural but did have episiotomy but have no idea how severe as refused to ever look to find out but apparently the stitches were very neat (mw told me that)! As my Mum was told when she had me you leave your dignity at the hospital door and pick it up when you leave to go home!!!

Having read all this morning's thread the thing that freaks me out the most is an injection in the perineum. really?! ouch.

I learnt an important lesson last night, if feeling poorly go to the gp in the day, don't leave it until 11pm to call 111! I'd been having back ache (like kidney pain) and a cramping stomach all day, and I stupidly ignored it. It got worse and I started to get lower back pain too so I called 111 expecting to be told to go to the OOH place, wee in a pot and have my stomach prodded a bit. Oh no. They send out a paramedic in a car, followed by two paramedics in an ambulance. I made it quite clear on the phone I didn't think that was necessary, but they insisted! It was so embarrassing, having three burly men examining my wee.

Anyway, it seems all is fine, no premature labour or UTI, although they couldn't work out why my blood pressure was high and I am getting the cramping. so I'm too keep and eye on thing and if it gets worse to go in to hospital. I bet everything is fine until 11pm tonight!

Dear me Eeyore... hope you're feeling better soon

I've had a good giggle at some of the posts this morning

WRT to pooing... I did with DC2 and didnt care in the slightest at the time, however I have to admit it is on my mind a lot at the moment

I also meant to say I have started with leaky boobs this morning!!

27 weeks today

So I have had the dreaded flu jab. No idea why I felt so against getting it, as I could not pin point a valid reason I just had it. No chance of backing out as it was like a conveyor belt system there was a huge queue but it went down in about 2 mins as they had a fast system going on.

Now I am wondering if I should have my children vaccinated? It doesn't seem right that I am vaccinated and they are not surely they are at greater risk than I am?

Really hoping I don't get any side effects. I hope you all have a good Saturday. I am still wondering what I should do for the day. Thinking to take my hyper children for a walk in the forest.

Oh no Eeyore, I hope you're okay! lots of rest today!

Jazzcat, your fart story had me chuckling! Someone farted in my class the other day and it absolutely stunk and we were all around the front watching a demo. I'm pretty certain it wasn't me...but can't be 100% sure lol.

In terms of tearing - I have bought an epi-no to try and minimise the chance and also to help avoid freaking out during labour as you get a bit of an idea of the sensation. Also some people swear by . Sexy!

In terms of uncontrollable laughing, DH was upstairs the other day and wondered what the hell I was doing as he could just hear me laughing hysterically downstairs. I was watching . It still makes me chuckle now!

God, I am supposed to be tidying up but so far have wasted lots of time on FB and now mumsnet. Must step away from the electical devices and get the shit tip house sorted. Then go do shopping and school work and then hopefully veg on the sofa and do some crochet. Why have I decided to make chimbo presents for more than just DH this year! He still hasnt even had his bday tshirt (it will now be chrimbo t-shirt - hopefully for this chrimbo!)

Hope you all have lovely days planned!

x

Haha, love the cat video. I can confidently say that none of our 3 cats would sit still for any of that. We have to psyche ourselves up to put flea drops on them because of the chasing and trapping involved. DP has ended up with arms covered in scratches. That must be a very old, docile cat.
I got an email saying that ds2 has a place at the local school! All that worry about having to attempt dangerous and long journeys whilst heavily pregnant and with a newborn have all gone. I feel like I can relax now in our new house, fully emerse ourselves into the new village and get ready for baby number 3.
I've just put Midwives on and DP is shocked by everything. (This is his first baby.) He's horrified by the guttural noises and seemed surprised to see a babies head emerging. Not sure what he expected to see but I'm glad he's slightly more prepared now.

Awww Thingy that is excellent news. I bet you are so relieved!