dvise needed - very sad

[Georgiesmum]

Hi, Please advise me, A fellow mumsnetter who I have become firm friends with has had a miscarriage. I am so sad for her, she is away at present. Should I tell her antenatal-group (thread) so they know or allow her to it? She has gone away for somr R & R and I dont wanyt her to be upset on her return.

Any Advise please

Sad news. If I were in her position, I think I'd want to be asked before someone did this for me. She might want to tell it in her own time. It is hers, after all. But it's kind of you to try to spare her further distress.

agree with prettycandles - i know you're trying to spare her unnecessary hurt but it's going to be hard anyway and part of the process is telling people.

mumsnet is a much nicer place than real life where many people don't know what to say so come out with platitudes or say nothing at all - when she feel ready and tells other mumsnetters, ime of MN, they will say some things to her that will be of great comfort so i'd let her do this herself.

I agree - it's lovely that you want to do something for her and spare her futher upset, but unless she's asked you do tell other people then I wouldn't say anything. She will tell everyone in her own time, when she's ready to do so and when she's ready to hear what people will want to say to her.

It's very kind of you to want to help her though.

Thanks for all your advise, I thought i shouldnt say anything but I just cant imagine how she is feeling. I will let her do it in her own time and just be there for her x