September 2013 Babies-the Glowing Trimester

[JammyTummy]

New thread! May it bring lots of good news, funny stories and happy bump mummies!

Restless legs yes! Feels like they'll go numb but sometimes when I flex my feet I get a cramp feeling in one toe!

I get same package as you frog SMP only after 18wks. I'm trying to save as much as possible now but it's not easy. Might buy a lottery ticket on Saturday!

I've been told to get luck legs it's a Mama mio lotion from mamas and papas supposed to work wonders for restless legs which I suffered from pre preg too gonna pick some up at the weekend so will report back for you fellow sufferers

Oh goodness, our HR department couldn't cope with that kind of innovative thinking! Last time I asked if I could carry over 3 weeks' holiday to the next year (rather than take the money up front) and they were very much 'does not compute!!'.
Fortunately due to timing this time around I'll go back to work in April and have my total year's 8 weeks' holiday accumulated so though I'll be off still, I'll be paid for the last 8 weeks - I'll need it by then!

Dreading smp, I'm not entitled to anything else. Never mind, I'm trying to save as much as possible just now. We'll stop eating out and spending money on the house for a few months. We're fairly organised, don't have much more to buy. We'll have a frugal few months and hopefully all will be ok.

Spoke to my sister about the twitchy leg issue. She's my pregnancy guru and also a nurse. She suggested tonic water, forgotten what it contains but apparently it works. Worth a try anyway!

It's quinine I think in tonic water isn't it? My ex's nan suffered horribly with restless legs and that was recommended to her too. The only other thing that helped was having someone sit on them for her (seriously!)

jennimoo it's lactulose.. Worked wonders.
Nowadays a few prunes in the morning and an apple in the day are doing the trick, but any sign of constipation and I'll be back on two teaspoons of lactulose in the morning. Was having two tsp in the morning and one tsp after dinner during the worst patch.

Ooh so so far I have restless legs, constipation and I'm self employed so get bum all in maternity pay. I was told it would be 90% of my pay, and as we only set the business up six months ago that doesn't bode well... ION had a lovely spa day today and managed an hour and a half body massage, albeit sitting up but it was luverly! Loved Jools Oliver book, but don't have kindle, only ipad and seems to be more expensive to buy books on their istore. Someone mentioned a book for 99p, it's 2.99 on ipad! Boooo.

Did someone mention you could bookmark where you were up to in a thread somehow?

Cheesestraw - there's a kindle app fit iPhone so I guess for iPad too, so you aren't stuck with iBooks if kindles cheaper :)

Just wanted to join the moan about smp. I had the added fail of being told I wouldn't have a job to go back to as I've been working on 1 year contracts for the past 3. Sigh, time for a change me thinks! Starting to worry as we haven't done any baby shopping yet. For those that have everything, how much do you think you have spent? I haven't really looked into it, but hoping eBay will save me.

Also another one here feeling absolutely exhausted again, so exhausted I have dreadful headaches and can't work. Fell asleep for two hours yesterday morning, and was asleep most of Friday last week too. Struggling to keep on top of work.

Hi all
Anyone really struggling with hip pain? Can barely walk today and have had to go sick. Last time I mentioned to midwife she said it will just get worse. Now it is worse is there anything I should push for or do I just need to put up with it? Don't know if its just painful cos of the extra weight or the start of pelvic girdle pain... Seeing midwife on Tuesday after scan (can't wait...) hope she has something more useful to say this time!

I'm not feeling any kicks yet but I do have a but of extra padding for them to get through so am hoping that's why.

We haven't got any baby stuff yet. Have just moved so been concentrating on that, also just waiting for scan to confirm everything is good then we will start getting everything at the end of this month.

Also someone asked about still bring emotional/ hormonal... I am big time - walked into a meeting last Weds and started to have a hot flush was so embarrassed I walked out and into the ladies where I was crying uncontrollably while a senior manager was saying dont worry its just your hormones- sooo embarrassing.

Then on Sunday spent the entire day sat on the bed crying whilst watching my husband put furniture together. Just couldn't pull myself together at all!

running have u been working for the same employer for 3 years? If so, you're probably still entitled to redundancy as they have to treat you the same as a permanent employee...

Derpess I'm suffering from pelvic/lower back pain, exercise tends to be uncomfortable when I do it, but helps afterwards (I do Pilates, yoga & swimming). I also see a chiropractor every few weeks who re-aligns my hips & sticks a few acupuncture needles in which helps massively but unfortunately it's not on the nhs! For me, anything that keeps me at work is worth the extra cost as I don't get much paid sick leave...

Runningbear - you should check out the AWR regulations for temp workers. I'm pretty sure you should be covered as long as you've worked there for more than 12 consecutive weeks since October. I hope that helps?

I get the same as the NHS package, which is 6 weeks at 90% of full pay, then 18 weeks of half pay plus SMP, then 12 weeks of SMP, then three months unpaid if I want to take the full year (which I think I do). I was worried about the unpaid time this time round as I'll still be paying nursery fees for DS, but in fact they have to carry on giving you childcare vouchers on top of your SMP as they are a benefit. I emailed payroll to check this and had a slightly oddly worded response saying 'it has to be your decision to stay in the scheme, but note the money will come from your departmental budget' . Ah well, I'm entitled to it and I'd be a fool to turn down an extra £250 a month for six months! Plus DS will get his free 15 hours a week by then which will cut down the bill. I'm planning to settle DS1 into reception and DS2 (first time I've used those terms!) into nursery in the first week or so of September 2014 and then back to work.

Thanks Ready- I will look into seeing a chiropractor privately if my midwife can't help. I'm also hoping to find a local pregnancy yoga class so that might help too.

Wincher I've been looking into what happens to childcare vouchers when I cut over to smp too - my work (private sector, global company) still give your childcare vouchers and take the money out of your smp (which doesn't actually leave much smp left over each month) and any other benefit they pay for it on my behalf, and when I go back they take everything I owe them for said benefits out of my first months pay!

The advice I have had (admitedly from work) is that they 'might' have work for me after my maternity leave and therefore take me back, but that they aren't obliged to. Things possibly are not helped by the fact that my current contract ends at the end of September, so I guess that means I'm not really being made redundant, just finishing off my contract. I am tempted to just run through things with the local Citizens Advice, although the gov.uk website seems to agree with work.

I get the equivalent 'benefits' as a permanent staff member which is the smp - 90% of pay for 6 weeks and the £136 for 33 weeks. God I wish I still worked for government

Interestingly, apparently I'm technically still on the payroll during mat leave, and after 4 years of rolling contracts we are supposed to be made permanent. So, 3 years of working on rolling contracts + 1 year of mat leave = 4 years right? Might raise that one ... or trot off into the sunset and become a part time yoga teacher instead

I don't earn a lot, but the thought of £136 a week is a little scary. Feel very grateful for a cheap/affordable mortgage and husband in work.

Will definately follow up the suggestions though! Thank you

RE hip pain, can you get a referral to a physio, that seems to be the standard practice. definately ask the mw.

ION ... I think Pip had hiccups last night! If felt like he was jumping inside at regular intervals, not like the odd one sided nudge I've felt before.

Derpress - ask about physio. I'm going to a general talk by the maternity physios tonight at 5:30 at the hosptial. It's offered to all pregnant women in my area and we're advised to go along before we have any issues. Then if you need proper physio it's also 'self-referral'.
Try contacting your nhs board direct and ask what the process is for referral to antenatal physio.

A friend of mine is a month ahead of me and has hip pain caused by an overly loose sacro-iliac joint (spine to pelvis at the back) and she's been measured for and fitted with a sort of girdle thing that she finds really helpful.

Mat Allowance for the self employed is only the £136 a week right from the start!!
Luckily as I am self-employed I always have a decent wodge of savings to tide me over a good few months... I also try to over-estimate the tax I am due to pay so when I get my next tax bill shoudl find i've saved more than I need.

So long as I stay fully busy over the whole summer then I'll still have that money to tide me through 3-6months post birth (going to do a tiny bit from 3months, first as my 10days KIT, then i'll give up MA because even working one a day a week earns me more than MA).

Creamtea1 they aren't allowed to do that! See this link: www.hmrc.gov.uk/employers/sml-salary-sacrifice.pdf. I've read various MN posts where people have had this battle with their employers, but the legal position seems pretty clear. The above document says "Therefore any SMP payable must be paid in full and in cash, for up to 39
weeks, regardless of any contrary contractual arrangements. In particular, the
SMP payable cannot be further reduced by the terms of a salary sacrifice
arrangement"

I'd have to pay the money back if I didn't return to work, but that's fair enough. I can't find anything from a quick google about the legalities of having to pay it back even after going back, but it's worth checking out. This link is also helpful: www.payingforchildcare.org.uk/data/files/Childcare_during_maternity_leave_April_2012.pdf

You do have to weigh up (and it's a decision to be made now, before the payslip nearest to 25 weeks), whether it's worth leaving the scheme now in order to make your pay when on mat leave higher, but then not receiving the vouchers through mat leave. If you don't have the appetite for a legal battle with your HR department right now you might well be better off leaving the scheme now so that your pay is higher, and rejoining when you go back to work.

I've just done the sums for myself and it's actually a closer decision than I thought. Based on my actual entitlement which I've just checked (8 weeks full pay, 16 weeks half pay plus SMP, 15 weeks SMP, 13 weeks unpaid) I will miss out on £1,376 less tax etc by staying in the scheme, but gain £1,568 by staying in it. So it is worth staying but not by a huge amount.

Bad guider- thanks I was wondering about physio. Will ask the midwife and if she can't help I will get on to the NHS board for my area.

Anyone having their scan today?

Thanks wincher that's invaluable info - I didn't know that at all and shall be taking that up with HR - that in itself will take weeks as our HR is off shore in India I think so everything is via email and takes days..