Announcing pregnancy when sil is due to give birth

[SayIAmAbird]

I am torn at what the best thing to do is, I just found out I'm pregnant with my second and will be due my 12 week scan at the end of November and that is when my wonderful SIL is expected to give birth to her first.
Ideally would like to wait till our 12 week scan before telling anyone but very conscious that I don't want to take any kind of spotlight away from them. Of course the actual birth of a baby is way more exciting than a pregnancy announcement but I just want to do what's right. I don't think my SIL or BIL would be fussed and would be in fact delighted for us but I guess you don't know for sure.
Should we tell people sooner to avoid having a pregnancy announcement so close the birth or should we go ahead and wait till our 12 week scan knowing everything is ok or even wait until their baby has arrived safely before we announce (although I think my body will give me away by then?!)

How close are you?

Is SIL the kind of person to get annoyed by this kind of thing?

You may want to tell a few close people for support if you have morning sickness or similar anyway - yours and DH parents for example

Unless there is big backstory I wouldn't think it matters - my SIL wouldn't be annoyed but she is lovely.

Also - having had 2 - in the nicest way there is a bit less fuss for baby number 2 just in general.

Just tell people a couple of weeks afterwards if it’s a big deal. It isn’t.

I always see on MN that people get extremely upset by these things. So you are wise to be cautious I think.

But you don't have to tell anyone at 12 weeks. You could wait a few weeks after that if you are concerned.

We are very close and get on very well so I can't imagine any issues but just want to do the right thing!
Yeah it's definitely a lesser deal the second time round and definitely not something we'll make a big deal of - just quietly let them know!

Why don't you wait until the baby is born and they've done the announcements and then share the news in a nice way like "we're so excited to let you know that baby will be a big cousin in x month"

Congratulations! Wait until a couple of weeks after the birth, there’s no rush to share x

I would wait until their baby is born, congratulate them, leave it a week or so and then announce.

If you announce before your 12 week scan and then you get bad news at the scan, you might wish you hadn't announced. And if you announce right when their baby is born they might feel you are stealing their thunder a bit. But you don't need to wait indefinitely, just leave a polite gap.

Mate people have had overlapping pregnancies since time immemorial… you’re not taking away their spotlight by announcing your pregnancy. Maybe don’t do it at her hospital bedside but otherwise it’s fine

I wouldn't worry OP, people don't get as excited about second baby announcements as they do about first babies. They'll just go "Oh that's nice!" then turn their attention back to your SIL.

Their baby might be late, I think it’s fine to announce if she’s still pregnant, but if she’s just given birth I’d leave it a few weeks

This literally happened with me and both my SILs both ways around and it was fine. I probably wouldn't do it on the day she gives birth I would give it a few weeks/ when you go and see baby?

Are you close enough to tell her first? See what she thinks? This is what I would do it will mean you can get an idea of what she thinks and it's a nice bonding moment for you both. It also gives her a chance to get any unreasonable pregnency feelings out of the way before you tell everyone else.

Just tell people a week after she's given birth. Or if you reach 12 weeks, she hasn't given birth and nothing happening yet with her, just tell people. If she then goes into labour the attention will go back on her anyway.

It depends, I'm pregnant with baby no. 3 there's loads of children in the family already so noone really cares anymore but can understand if it's the first few grandchildren then there's a lot of excitement over it.

Just do what you want to do! If someone cries that you burst tbeir bubble then they need to wobble their head.

Just wait until a few weeks after the birth?

Can't you just wait a week or two?