Bad timing to share my news? Advice welcome

[Amyjade2022]

Hey everyone
I found out a few weeks ago I’m expecting my 3rd baby and while I was initially shocked we are very excited and the news has sunk in. However I am so anxious to tell people (partly because I’m expecting the ‘you must be crazy’ ‘another one?!’ comments)
But also my mum has been really unwell the last few weeks she was having tests that could have showed something serious however she’s had the results and thankfully will be okay. I was waiting until after this to tell her but my younger sister is also getting married in 6 weeks and I really don’t want to look like I’m trying to outshine her with dropping this announcement or make her panic I won’t be up to being part of her hen do or maid of honour duties. These factors were stressing me out enough but then today a Co worker I work very closely alongside has shared the news she has just lost a baby and now I feel so anxious about sharing the news with work too 🙁please help I don’t want to upset anyone or stress them out.

i am only 7 weeks so I have time I didn’t tell people with my first 2 until after the 12 weeks scan. But part of me thinks do I get it out sooner to my sister rather than later so it’s not too close to the wedding

sorry for the long post can you tell it’s all that’s been on my mind lol

Congratulations on the pregnancy and your Mum being OK.
I don't understand this modern fashion for worrying about stealing other people's thunder. People may get pregnant at the same time as other family members get married. It's all just good news for your family - share it whenever you are ready, and be happy.

Can you wait until a couple of weeks after your sister's wedding? I don't really believe in stealing thunder either, but some people do, and if you wait until after her big day then no one will be able to accuse you of it.

Nothing you can do about your colleague, I'm afraid. It will be difficult for her whenever you announce your pregnancy. Just try not to talk too much about it in front of her.

I would tell your sister and your mum, but tell them you’re not going to make an announcement til after the wedding, when you will be only just over 12 weeks anyway. I’m sure they will be excited, but you can focus all your attention on them

for your work colleague, I would wait til after 12 weeks for sure. Then tell her via text before you tell anyone else, and don’t expect a response. I have no idea what your team is like but if I was her manager I would appreciate you telling me that she might need some sensitivity and/ or time off around the time you tell people.

Thank you!
I don’t understand either it doesn’t bother me but I feel like my sister willl 😐

T

O

Yes when I first found out my plan was to just wait until after the wedding to tell anyone but I will be 13/14 weeks by then and I just don’t know if I’ll be able to hide it in the dress / not drinking at her hen party etc. I know they’re petty reasons but it’s all I’ve been thinking about

Thank you for your advice it’s very helpful getting a perspective from someone else

I agree tell your sister and your mum privately so they don't question the whole "not drinking" thing as far as anyone else is concerned your on antibiotics for a stomach complaint which happily takes care of any "bloating" questions

Being honest, I don't think the announcement of a third pregnancy is going to steal your sister's thunder. A first baby - especially if it is a first grandchild - is obviously really big news, but a third, not so much. Not in an awful way - my third DC is just as loved by the wider family as our first - but somehow it just wasn't newsworthy. Letting people know was more like telling them I'd bought a new handbag or repainted the kitchen 😀

I had this and waited until after my sisters wedding to tell everyone.

I don't understand why you "won't be up" to doing any of the bridesmaids duties?

Just tell them that you're pregnant. You aren't stealing anyone's thunder but it will explain why you aren't drinking etc. Tell her you'll tell the wider group after the wedding

Haha 😆 I get this and it’s kind of what I’m hoping for to be honest.
I just think everyone will be expecting my sister to announce her first pregnancy this year then here I am going again lol 🙈

I guess I meant won’t be up to fitting in my dress haha 😬

Yes as long as you don't announce it at the hen do or at the wedding I think it's perfectly acceptable to tell people whenever you want!

Oh yes, good point, announcing it at the hen do or wedding would not be a good idea!

At 13 weeks? How tight is this dress?