Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Birth announcements

Share your unique birth stories and read heartwarming stories from fellow mums. For more on your baby’s development, check out the Mumsnet Ages & Stages emails.

The shock of having no one

4 replies

FoodFann · 26/09/2023 15:55

My next baby is due, and it’s got me thinking about the newborn days, and how disappointing people were. We had some family visit us, but they just wanted to take photos of the baby and do absolutely nothing to help. They all expected us to host them, cook for them, etc. Looking back, I am disgusted with their behaviour.

It really caught me off-guard to find that I had no one. I didn’t realise I was one of those Mums who had ‘no village’. I think I’m only admitting it now, months later, that I needed help. I struggled, very close to the edge of things going wrong.

Luckily, my mum has turned things round since the newborn days, and sees us once a week now. Thank god.

I’m sure there must be lots of ladies who have discovered, to their surprise, that they are a lot more alone than they anticipated.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
rowantree1997 · 26/09/2023 15:59

I didn't experience this but I did become part of a 'village' in terms of help and friendship when my children started primary school.
I made a real effort to make friends and organise coffees and nights out.
Some are my best friends are from the primary school days and my youngest is nearly 21.

FoodFann · 26/09/2023 16:11

@rowantree1997 that is so lovely. Thank you. I will also be the village for any of my friends/family who have babies.

OP posts:
Toddler101 · 13/10/2023 09:16

My village is my NCT group and our WhatsApp group chat. We're going through the round of second babies now and still so, so supportive. Oh and my lovely neighbour, too. But family? Not so much. My family and pre-babies friends sound like yours - here for the photos.

BaybeeTammy · 18/10/2023 20:21

Same here baby only 2wks old.
Some family have visited
Some have said they are at the shops so can pop in, no offers of do you need, would you like anything getting.
Some have been imposing.
Some have felt entitled and almost annoyed that they hadn't been straight away.
They only come to see baby. No help with older children, no attention on them etc.
No offers of help in the home or to make a drink etc.
Fuck em 🤣

New posts on this thread. Refresh page