Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Birth announcements

Share your unique birth stories and read heartwarming stories from fellow mums. For more on your baby’s development, check out the Mumsnet Ages & Stages emails.

Feel traumatised by the birth of my baby

13 replies

BlueBunny23 · 28/09/2022 15:41

I went into labour and while in the hospital my baby’s heart rate dipped and kept trying to recover but would just dip again and again. A dr came in and checked and he said the cord was under babys head so cord was coming out first and this was an emergency and I needed a c section. I was so scared of needing a c section but of course I agreed because it was the only way my baby would be born safely. I was rushed into theatre and everyone was lovely except this one man dressed in red he was in his 50s and it looked like he was perving on me and he had to spray me with cold spray he kept lifting up my gown and spraying the sides of my breast I felt very uncomfortable I was naked under the gown because I wanted skin to skin and then once my baby was born my midwife put the baby on my chest and covered me and baby with a blanket and my partner looked over as he seen the man standing right behind me and he was staring at my breast that was on show that I hadn’t noticed as I was looking at my baby on my right side and my left breast was on show and my partner pulled the gown back over my breast and the man walked away. I was then asked about having a tablet placed in my bum and asked if I minded who did it, the man in red immediately said he will do it and I said no I want the midwife too as she said she would do my catheter so I wanted her to put the tablet in too, the man in red said I don’t mind you know. I said but I just want the midwife too! The other man who was the one who done my epidural agreed that the midwife would do it if I requested that as 99% of the women request the midwife and who want would a male putting things in her bum! I was then put in recovery some time later and the midwife was helping me to breastfeed and the man in red kept coming in and the midwife in the end told him to step outside of the bay and keep the curtain closed and he can talk to her through the curtain and that there is no need to him to be in the bay with us. He sat right outside where the curtains met and kept peeking through to watch me breastfeed he was staring at my breasts every chance he got! I feel really traumatised by needing an emergency c section and how bad things could have went but to have an old man perving on me at such a traumatic time in my life I feel violated and I know I wasn’t imagining it as my partner seen him and the midwife had to tell him to back off !
am I just being silly because I was having a bad day and now my hormones are coming crashing down or should I be feeling this way? I keep crying over it all and having flash backs of it all. Didn’t mind the midwife doing my catheter or putting a tablet in my bum or squeezing my nipple and helping my breastfeed as it’s her job but this man was just perving!

OP posts:
MolliciousIntent · 28/09/2022 15:43

Did you at any point ask who he was? You need to register a complaint with the hospital.

BlueBunny23 · 28/09/2022 22:02

@MolliciousIntent he just works in the theatre and does epidurals as he said at some point he was off to do some epidurals. I didn’t think to ask as he was just one of the members working there and there was quite a few

OP posts:
Katnissx · 14/11/2022 21:57

That sounds horrendous, you poor thing! I would definitely put a complaint in to stop him doing this to other women in the future. Maybe consider counselling to help to heal from the trauma of the situation xx

TeaAndJaffacakes · 14/11/2022 22:05

If he does epidurals he was be an anesthesiologist or anesthetist.

TeaAndJaffacakes · 14/11/2022 22:06

He will be

FictionalCharacter · 14/11/2022 22:22

Complain. I thought he might be a theatre nurse but if he really is doing epidurals he must be an anaesthetist, in which case why the hell would he be watching you breastfeed or offer to give your suppository. From the way the midwife told him to back off it sounds like he’s a known perv who isn’t being dealt with by the hospital.
So sorry you went through this 💐

Katapolts · 14/11/2022 22:24

What a horrible experience for you! I would ask for your notes and see if you can find out who he is.

nocoolnamesleft · 14/11/2022 22:26

Sounds like he was the anaesthetist. The cold spray is used to check that the spinal/epidural is numbing pain enough to do the surgery, but not so far up that it's affecting the breathing. Asking about a suppository for afterwards also sounds like the anaesthetist as they have an interest in postop pain relief. They are meant to check on patients after the operation. It does sound like his communication skills could be better.

Toddlerteaplease · 14/11/2022 22:40

I think @nocoolnamesleft is right. It would be his job to give a suppository. And epidural levels have to be checked, to check they are not going to high. We use a cold glove in children, but adults probably use cold spray. You really really don't want that epidural going to high up. Don't know what the protocol is for maternity, but we have to check levels every half an hour for at least four hours after it's commenced.

Rainbowcat99 · 14/11/2022 22:47

Given what @Toddlerteaplease and @nocoolnamesleft have said, it sounds possible that he was looking at your chest to monitor breathing rather than looking at your breasts. However, the fact is that you felt vulnerable and nothing was explained properly and so it's playing on your mind. Could you contact your hospital and ask them to explain who he was and his role? It might put your mind at ease.
In my experience people working in operating theatres are sometimes a little lacking in people skills because their patients are usually unconscious.

Toddlerteaplease · 14/11/2022 22:50

This is the chart that is used to check epidural levels. It is not supposed to go above a specified level.

Feel traumatised by the birth of my baby
Lj8893 · 15/11/2022 06:53

Sounds like the anaesthetist. However in my trust the suppository would be given by the obstetrician.
I would definitely ask to go through your notes with somebody so you can clarify a few things.

Toddlerteaplease · 15/11/2022 12:33

Definitely see if you can have a debrief with a midwife. No health care staff should leave you feeling like that.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page