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Announcing to family.. advice please?!?

13 replies

Notacluewhatimdoing · 21/10/2021 09:30

OK so this morning, I found out I'm pregnant!!!!GrinBlush. I haven't even told my OH yet as he's at work and I don't want to text him the news but me and OH mom work for the same company and we have a work night out Friday!! They will fully suspect something if I don't drink or smoke (as normally I do) and his mom will notice straight away and in a way I don't want to lose the excitement of telling them by them figuring it out from Fridays night out as this is the first baby on their side in 16 years! And our first child (I can't cancel, due to it being a work do) but partners of employees can go too. I think I'm about 5 weeks so I know it's early to even tell anyone but has anyone ever told parents earlier on like this? I'm worried ill jinx it and something bad will happen but I'm not ready to tell my family yet as it will spread like wildfire so have no one to ask for advice..

I hope you all have an amazing day

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Reduceddutiesboredom · 21/10/2021 09:44

Unless you’re being paid for it you can definitely cancel a works night out.
I’d lie and say you were unwell - sickness and diarrhea, new cough, temperature, etc. There’s plenty of colds/ flu/ norovirus going around.

I told my own mum at 6ish weeks, but waited till 12 weeks to tell MIL because she can’t keep her mouth shut to save herself!

Notacluewhatimdoing · 21/10/2021 09:48

Yeah I mean I can cancel it but his mom is very nosey and she only means well but she is a "motherer" as I say, she'd be round like a shot at the first murmur of one of us being sick lol!!! I'm very torn as it's so soon after finding out, but when OH brother gf fell pregnant his mom knew like before they even knew! She said she could just sense it Hmm idk if it's real people can sense it but OH brother and gf reallt didn't know and his mom was like someone here is pregnant in this house I can sense it Confused I was freaked out hahaha! Idk I guess I'll just have a think and once I even tell my OH lol! I'm just freaking out and no one to freak out with am moment lmao Blush

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CrazylazyJane · 21/10/2021 09:53

You could definitely develop a 'suspicious cough' and not go to the works event. No employer in their right mind would tell you off in this climate for staying away.

Or, you say partners can go. Is your partner going? If so, you can ask for a sparkling water, in a tall glass, with ice and a slice and tell people it's a gin and tonic. Any alcoholic drinks bought for you, you can palm off on your partner. As for the smoking? "I'm trying to cut down. My ciggie count went too far during lockdown". Only you know what your MIL will buy into though.

Congratulations though. You can not jinx it, so if you're happy for people to know early then tell them.

Reduceddutiesboredom · 21/10/2021 09:58

@Notacluewhatimdoing sounds like hard work! Could you fake covid symptoms, then she couldn’t visit until you “get” you’re results back?

Not sure about the whole ‘sensing’ that someone is pregnant, but some women do definitely get a glow early on - but it might just be a side effect of the pregnancy vitamins and no wine! Smile I stopped drinking & smoking for a few months before TTC and without fail every time I seen MIL she’d ask if I was pregnant because I’d say no to a glass of wine, she definitely didn’t believe me to start with!

Once DH is home you can freak out together, then enjoy such a wonderful moment! Grin

Itistimeforquiche · 21/10/2021 10:00

Have close contact ping at the last minute

Fake fake fake. You will have to do a lot of that y til you tell everyone so might as well get practicing


MrsRubyMonday · 21/10/2021 10:07

We told our close family as soon as we found out. My thinking was that if the worst did happen we would want their support anyway and I'd rather have them get to be excited than just hear bad news. I'm now 11 weeks today and all going fine :) talk to your OH tonight and get his thoughts too, he will know if she is able to keep the secret.

Notacluewhatimdoing · 21/10/2021 10:11

Yeah maybe I'm over thinking it Grin I have a habit of doing that. Yeah I'll speak to partner when he's home and see what he thinks, it his is mom after all lol thank you for your advice... we was trying to its not a complete shock but I am shocked at the same time lmao @CrazylazyJane

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Notacluewhatimdoing · 21/10/2021 10:12

@Reduceddutiesboredom yeah she's amazing don't get me wrong but she almost don't have like boundaries.. and will be soo blunt about thinks if she thinks it she'll say it. And I cannot lie to save my life lmfao we will see how it goes when OH is home.. thank you for your advice xx

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Notacluewhatimdoing · 21/10/2021 10:15

@MrsRubyMonday yeah I mean I feel the same I'd love to tell people but both sides of the family can't keep quiet I have 3 sisters and I'm the last one to get pregnant and all the other times it's spread like wildfire around the whole family (we r a very big family) and my partners side its like his mom would tell her mom who would tell her other daughter and so on and then before you know it everyone knows 🤣 but we will see! I'm dying for OH to get home he won't be home until 7 Hmm thanks so much though everyone. I was proper freaking out this morning lmao

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girlmom21 · 21/10/2021 10:22


We told DP's parents almost straight away each time (2 full term pregnancies, one miscarriage). First pregnancy he was in shock and needed to talk to his mom, second and third times they were our childcare for appointments etc.

We told my DF and SM straight away with 1 and 2 and at about 8 weeks with 3.

MrsFin · 21/10/2021 11:41

FWIW DH knew I was pregnant before i I did. He said I smelled different and got me a pregnancy test. Not sure a MIL would notice a smell though!

Notacluewhatimdoing · 21/10/2021 12:16

@girlmom21 yeah I mean I'm not sure I'll be able to hide to for too long anyway as my partner is self employed with his dad lmao and we are round theirs several times a week lol! But we will see what OH wants to do.. as it is his parents at the end of the day lol

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toadstool32 · 26/10/2021 16:29

Ha I'm 21+4 and still haven't told many people. Defo fake the works do. Without sounding negative you're still very very early and things could go one way or another

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