nowanearlyNicemum has VERY nice baby despite not so nice birth

[nowanearlyNicemum]

a bit belated I know but wanted to shout from the rooftops the arrival of Lucy on October 27th - 3kg650g and 51cm, so smaller than her sister despite all drs' prognostics!

In spite of recent fears of being railroaded into 2nd c-section by obstetrician I finally received amazing support from midwives who did all they could to enable me to have a VBAC. Alas, it was not to be. I was induced, survived the mega-contractions from 6am but ended up with c-section at 10pm. I was surprisingly philosophical about the whole experience considering how against the c-section I was. But it was totally different to last time - I felt I'd received great care and attention, and dp was allowed to be present at Lucy's birth. All in all a great experience - although not the one I'd hoped for.
When I came out of theatre my epidural had gone pretty wrong, my neck was rigid and I couldn't feel anything from my neck down - it was very scary. I couldn't feed Lucy straight away because of this either. After a few hours in the recovery room my limbs etc were beginning to feel normal and they were about to transfer me to the maternity ward when I started to feel really peculiar - in particular, terribly anxious and scared - and that's when one of the midwives noticed I was haemorraging (sp?). My uterus wasn't contracting properly so I had to go back to theatre under general anaesthetic this time so they could sort it out. They nearly had to take the whole lot out apparently so I'm considering myself lucky to still have the relevant equipment for a possible 3rd but dp won't hear a word about it. He was terrified and has said there's no way he's ever going through that again. Don't really want our decision to be based on this bad experience... does anyone have any similar experience to share?
Anyway, far too early to be talking about a third. Just enjoying my 2 lovely girls for now and thanking my lucky stars that we're all ok at the end of the day.
Thanks to all those of you who gave me great advice re standing my ground with the obstetrician and trying for the VBAC I so wanted. xxx

wow!! you were the first person i responded to on Mumsnet!!! and i was wondering how you got on!!! delighted to hear of the safe arrival of Lucy..lovely name.......! sounds a bit ropey afterwards...so if you need to go through it with he head of midwifery or a birth counselling place...do not hesitate!!

at the moment..enjoy your family.......don't worry about number 3 just yet......

wishing you all the very very best and looking forward to hearing about Lucy's progress..........

Lulu xx

cheers lulu!
have enquired about the birth counselling thing but this is France and they looked at me very blankly, then gave me the number of the hospital psychologist.
will see how I feel as time goes on... DO feel the need to talk about but DON'T want to dwell on it either. will mention it to my gp next time I have to take one of the girls.
better go and feed Lucy now, she's a right guzzler - just like her mum

congratulations on the birth of your second daughter!
I have 3 dds and it's fab
hope you're feeling better
enjoy your little dds

thanks hana
dp is beginningto come to terms with hzving three women in the hoose!!

Very well done. Another pink one. Aslightly jelous gingeme here. xx

Congratulations on the birth of Lucy . Sorry to hear you had such a rough time.

I've just started a thread about going against the consultant's advice. Interesting to read your story.

Incidentally there's a Birth Crisis helpline which you should be able to call regardless of being in France. You might want to talk your experience through with someone over the next few months. I'm afraid I have a new keyboard and can't find the backslash key and therefore post the link so here it is www.sheilakitzinger.com/Birth%20Crisis.htm

Hi nearly

congratulations!!

sounds like you had a really rotten time of it hope you are feeling better now

where in france are you? I am in france to we have just mooved here

Helen

I'm near Nice (hence the name )
Where are you?

oh I thought that was nice (as in pleasant etc) I am not far from Poitiers

Many congrats Nicemum xxx

Hope that you are feeling ok after this. Keep a check on your iron levels as anaemia can effect bf.

I had a haemorrage and afterwards dh was worried about it happening again. Anyhow when I was preg again my dh would get very stressed about this but making plans on how to cope if it happened helped. Strange thing was that, even though it's something very concerning, I never worried about it happening again.

Congratulations! Hope you and Lucy are doing well

aw......well done you..CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!

Lucy is a lovely name!!

What an experience !!!! Well done for being philosphical about it... hope Lucy and you are bonding well [wmile]
You can always use Birth Crisis in the UK (it's a phone line) if you want to talk about it.... I know the French system does leave a lot to be desired and I am quite surprise at how your body reacted too....
Take good care of yourself!

Oof, poor you, but on the other hand: lucky you to have your Lucy! Congratulations

CONGRATULATIONS!! NowaNiceMum and welcome to the world Lucy.

Sorry for what you went through, sounds scary. Just give your dp time, it must have been horrible for him.

We are here to talk to when you need us.

thanks for all your lovely messages
took Lucy to my gp today for her 1 month examination and all is fine and dandy
gp gave me a bit of an MOT aswell and said I was progressing nicely. we were talking about the birth and I was telling him very factually what happened and then found myself welling up. obviously going to take some time to get over it but I will try contacting Birth Crisis. Thanks for that tip, I'd never heard of it before.

i had similar thing with my 1st dd,had horrid MW though who wouldnt listen to me,epidural not working and vomiting6ft up walls,turned out placenta coming away and i was heamorraging,consultant said 5 more mins and me and baby wouldnt have made it.DH was terriefied and even now if an emergency happens on a maternity programe he has to leave the room.He did not want any more babies after that he was too scared,but as you know i had 2 more,both vbac,so dont let it put either of you off.Saying that the trauma of nasty mw did give me PND,so its a really gd idea to talk it out.
Thrilled that you got a lovely healthy baby though,well done

Congratulations! Glad you and Lucy are now doing well.

On a more serious note, I think CountessDracula has similar experience of a serious PPH.
May be worth starting a seperate thread to help work through your feelings on it - don't forget to look after yourself as well as Lucy. X

Congratulations! Lovely name and glad to hear you're all OK.

RE, the thrird thing. DS1 nearly killed us both in pregnancy (eclampsia- fits and all) and scared us to bits, I was pg again within 5 months- really didn't want Sam to be an only child and knew the longer I left it the harder it'd be (I'd also had hyperemesis). DS3 came a few years after. The only thing I would say is talk to your Ob first and ask his advice, if he says OK grit your teeth and do it- you'll only regret it otherwise.

thanks peachy, great to hear you 'worked through' the trauma of your first birth to go on and have 2 more!! am seeing my ob next Wed for my 6 week check so will be able to go through my enormous list of questions with her then!!

IssyK, thanks for the tip re CountessDracula - will have to track her down for a chat if she's up for it. In the meantime, am planning on phoning Birth Crisis when I come home to the UK at Christmas but really need to find somewhere where dp and I can go together to talk things through. (Also have to persuade dp that we need to talk to someone about it, which could be the hardest bit - men!!! )

Lucy waking up for a feed... better go and grab her before she wakes dd1 from her nap!!

sorry peachy, I DID read your post correctly!! I meant traumatic pregnancy not birth