24 days

[MadLenny]

It's 24 days since we lost my beloved Grandad and am feeling especially low tonight. Feel like I've not had a chance to grieve yet as there has been so much to sort out and my Gran has needed a lot of support. Now, to top it all off, I'm back at school and feel like I'm back on the treadmill of life without ever having the chance to take a moment and just miss him IYSWIM. Just need someone to talk to but don't want to upset my OH as this has brought back a lot of sad memories about the loss of his dad.

well you're in the right place, do you want to tell us about him?

He was an old bugger, in the nicest possible way, cantankerous and always told you exactly what he thought - even if it was 'christ, lassie you're fairly puttin oan the beef!'. But he was my Grandad and I loved the bones of him. He had high standards and we were all expected to exceed them, but he was always proud of everything we did .He would pretend he didn't want the fuss of us kissing him goodbye but my Gran says that secretly he loved it. He was disappointed when my sister and I got pregnant before we were married, a relic of being born to an unmarried mother and then adopted, but absolutely adored our children. He used to complain about the noise and all the grandchildre/great grandchildren running in and out but would then go into a funk for days after we left because he missed us. He would never phone you, would ask why you were bothering to phone him with all this nonsense and then keep talking to keep you on the phone for longer.
I want to be able to tell him I love him and that I am who I am because he helped shape my life.
I miss him

MadLenny
You have given a wonderful description of your lovely grandad. How lucky to have had him for all this time - we always want more time don't we. My granda died when I was 12 and I still think about him a lot and wish he was here.
They were men of a different generation in so many wonderful ways - but we are so lucky to have happy, happy memories.

he sounds fab!
Would it help to tell your grandmother any of it - not now, but maybe to write down for some time in the future?