Questions about death

[mamaafrica]

Hi there,
My nearly 7 year old ds is often asking about death and what happens after. So far I've managed quite well. Now, sometimes, he starts crying and says he's afraid of dying.
I've tried to assure him by saying that we need to grow really old like my grandmother, who's 97, before we die.
That works a while and them he'll say he hopes he gets to drive a car before he dies.
Anyone out there with some advise?

No real advice, I had the same with DS2 at arround the same age as yours. We told him that most people do live reasonably long unless poorly or having a bad accident and that we are certainly hoping for him to grow old and wrinkly. I think the question sparked after the death of a 6yo in his school and he realised that sometimes children do die as well, not just old people. We have tried to reassure him that it was rare for children to die so young and that all we can do is enjoy a day at the time and hope for the best.

He also was scared of us dying (parents). He kept on asking who would take care of him if we died (both DH parents died when he was still a child and he was raised by older brothers ans sisters, I think it played in his mind because he realised that his older sister would not be old enough to look after him if we passed away).We tried to remind him about all his extended family that loves him and would be looking after him and his siblings in such event but that we hoped to be with him for a long time.

I suppose you have to start gently with any explanation and see how much they are able to take in as all children have different sensitivity to things.

No real advice, but I clearly remember feeling like this as a child. He needs reassurance, tons of cuddles and lots of telling that it will be ok.

My great aunt died when i was tiny, I remember feeling entirely powerless. thinking it was going to happen to ne. I tried to jump off the climbing frame to see if I could fly, whilst saying a silent prayer for my aunt.

never told anybody this....

a proper explanation would have helped me.

(sorry, photographic memory)

aww..i was like that as a child..very worried about death..he's a very smart sensitive boy..lots or reassurance and hugs in order..I used to be so upset i would hope we could all die together as a family so no one would be left behind alone morbid or what..he will get over it..children are very black and white at his age..just support him and try not to worry too much