My Auntie is dying.

[JollyPirate]

Am not a JollyPirate this evening. Have just heard that my auntie's op for a removal of the cancer growth in her vagina has been cancelled because the results of her CAT scan have come back and "something's come up and it's serious".

It appears the cancer has spread to her lungs.
She's 74 but so young in her outlook. My Nan who is 88 (and very very healthy) hates life and spends every evening praying she won't wake up in the morning. I don't wish cancer on her but just wish her health on my lovely auntie who is so special to me.

Can't stop crying - my Mum is in bits (it's her sister)

My auntie is such a lovely person. She has to go to the hospital on Tuesday to see the Consultant. As a nurse I know they don't just cancel ops unless there is no hope. I suspect they are going to tell her "nothing more we can do".

Am also very angry because over the last year it seems there has been no communication between hospital and GP over things. They are now saying "we suspected this a year ago". I am thinking "well why the f**k didn't you do anything about it then"

My auntie had a cancer of the uterus 3 years ago. A year ago it returned and they did more radiotherapy and scans. Then said it was all gone and scans etc were clear.They mentioned then that there was a cyst on her lung and that they might look more closely at that - they never have and silly me thought "well they can't suspect anything then". Now of course they are saying they did.

Can't get hold of my Mum - phone is constantly engaged.

I am so so sorry JP I can't imagine how shitty you are feeling right now and I truly am sorry for you and your family.
I have an Aunt who I am very very close to and I would be heartbroken if I got this news I am so sorry .

Thank you - got through to my Mum - she's really upset. The hospital phoned my auntie today and just said that the op was cancelled as the results of the CAT scan shows tumours in her lungs and also in her lower leg. They want to see her Tuesday to "discuss things". She's asked my Mum to go with her and I'm glad about that as my Mum will take in anything my auntie doesn't.

She's being very positive- just saying that she's "not going anywhere yet". In a way I believe that because she has gained 2kg in the last few weeks and looks well.

Just so numb at the moment though.

i'm going through a similiar experience with my aunt who's in her 80's [its my great aunt but we're very close].we weren't expecting her to be here at xmas but she's still with us.my aunts also very positive and up-beat.i'm seeing her tomorrow as we've got a family party and wild horses wouldn't stop her from being there.i'm just trying to make the most of what times left as we know she won't recover.i'll be thinking of you and your family.take care xx

So sorry for you. I lost my Nan to cancer late last year and was devestated.

All I can say to you is at least you have the time to tell her and show how much you love her.

Take care

My Mum has just been diagnosed with cancer of the bowel that has spread to her lungs and liver. She's 72, so a similar age to your aunt. The doctors also decided not to operate on her tumour - and at first we thought the worst, that they just weren't 'bothering' because of the extent of the cancer. Since then we've found out that the reason was that it would have been a major op with a 6-8 week recovery period, therefore delaying the time when she could start chemotherapy. I wonder if this could be the case with your aunt? I know it doesn't make the news any less devastating, but we felt it put a slightly more positive slant on things, iyswim.

My Mum is very healthy, apart from the cancer, and is therefore a very good candidate for chemo. Maybe your aunt will be the same? Thinking of you - xx

Many thanks all of you. My auntie is being utterly inspirational at the moment. She says there was a time during her 50s when she was really unwell and at one point felt that she didn't care if she lived or died. Her philosophy is that at present she feels well and that if and when she reaches the point that she doesn't care then it won't matter anyway to her. In the meantime she is going to enjoy life. To be honesty she's quite humbling.

And many thanks to you sphil for your positive post - hopefully my auntie be a candidate for chemo too. Sending positive wishes to your Mum.

JP - my Mum is just like your aunt in her attitude. She keeps saying that we all have to die some time, but she doesn't plan on going anywhere just yet!

i have just found out (10 mins ago) that my great aunt is dying. she had cancer 7 years ago and it has returned in her liver and bones. i have to tell my mum when she gets here in about an hour. any advice on how to do this would be greatly appreciated.

Hi CM - only just seen your post . So sorry to hear your news - life is truly crap sometimes. How did you get on with speaking to your Mum?

My auntie is seeing the Consultant tomorrow at 10.30am - my Mum was going with her but today my aunt is saying she's not sure that she wants my Mum to and feels all "up in the air". Think it's beginning to sink in - am so hoping that like sphil said - they have cancelled the op to concentrate on chemo.

Good luck to your auntie for tomorrow. My Mum's oncologist is brilliant, as are all the team - I hope she has the same experience.

Better news today. They are going to do chemo and also some radiotherapy. It's in her lungs and also in her lower leg - the consultant says it's very rare to occur in the lower leg and back is more common.

So chemo - 1 lot every three weeks plus radiotherapy on her leg to reduce the tumour (which is small apparently) and relieve the pain.

Feel a bit better now and so does my auntie.

I'm pleased you've had better news. My Mum is on a similar three weekly cycle. The Cancerbackup website is an excellent source of info by the way.