Wedding gift for widow - inappropriate?

[Lindax]

Hi all, need a bit of advice. Work colleague/friend lost husband to cancer a couple of weeks ago, it was only 7 weeks from diagnosis to him passing away. They've been together 15 years and have a 6 year old son.

They were planning to get married in secret later in October, but had to bring it forward and got married in the hospital about a month ago.

Have seen her a couple of times since the funeral and among other things have talked about the wedding and how special it was that they managed to get married before he passed away. I was wondering if it was appropriate to buy a "wedding gift" to somehow mark the occasion as it seems to have passed buy uncelebrated.

Was thinking about a handcarved keepsake box like this to keep memories in for her and her ds, like letters, watch, photos etc. Perhaps inscribed inside with their names/dates or something (need to think about that more).

Do you think this is appropriate? I know some of you have been through this yourselves in the past, would you have appreciated the thought or would you think it was insensitive?

Linda x

I think (1) you know your friend best (2) that it's a lovely idea but (2) I wouldn't do the inscribing, because (and this might not come our very clearly) it should be a place where she defines the memories, and any inscription might seem like an intrusion on that.

But you're a wonderful friend and I hope that she'll take the gift in the spirit it's given.

thats a lovely gift- you are a v thoughtful friend.

I know someone in a similiar situation and I know she would be very touched that you are marking their special day, and giving her an opportunity to remember her DH.

The only thing is - and I don't know how to say this but a wooden box may not be such a good idea if the husband was cremated iyswim - it doesn't look dissimiliar to a cremation box - which wouldn't matter in any other circumstance! Hope you don't take offence - I mean well.

what was his birth stone?
Buy her a little piece of jewellery with it in (if it's not to expensive) she can wear it and think of him...

I have a necklace with ds 1's birthstone and I love it

poppy - taking on board your comments about an inscription

nauseous - thought did occur to me too that it looked a little bit like a cremation box - was looking for something of quality that would stand the test of time, will look about for a different styles - thanks for the input.

What a lovely and thoughtful idea. would a little silver box do the trick? square/rectangle/heart shape available?

i think it is a lovely idea, we have a memory box that a MNetter sent us, it has a place to put a photo in the lid which is lovely, the kids like to change the photo of their dad most weeks.
thankyou for doing this for your friend.