Lost my Mum this morning

[Crazyladee]

Well here I am again five years later posting on the bereavement board. The first time was the suicide of my son. This time, my Mum. Passed suddenly during the early hours in her sleep. She hadn't been ill...no signs of anything wrong. In fact last night, my Dad and her had my sister and family over for a get together (DH and I weren't there as we had already been invited to his parents for Easter Sunday) and she was full of life and even having a little boogie in the kitchen. It had been a late one. She went to bed at approx 1am and my Dad found her this morning sat up in bed with her reading glasses on, passed away.

We're all in shock. She's been my rock since losing our son. I honestly thought she had at least another good few years left in her. Totally devastated. 😢

I am so so sorry. This truly is awful for you.

My own lovely mum died suddenly 6 weeks ago, after a short hospital stay - we had no idea she was dying. She was 66, and we expected several more years for her. I am still so lost, and sometimes really quite sad. I’m signed off work until the end of the month but think I’ll take a little longer, for various reasons.

I wish I had some words that might help you, but I don’t. The hole in your life left by your mum is huge. I spoke to mine every day, and find myself quietly crying when I realise I can’t tell her something. Or sometimes bursting into tears when someone asks me something, or I have to tell someone who missed out finding out at the time.

A couple of things I found: the ‘dead mum’s club’ is a real thing, and I have been supported by so many lovely women who have given their time for coffee or a walk. I’ve had time with so many wonderful friends, who have all been generous with their time. I had an insane number of flowers, most from people who had never met mum, the outpouring of love was unreal. I’m still pretty cross that she’s gone, and I really wasn’t ready.

just be kind to yourself, this one takes a while.

So sorry for your loss but what a lovely last day, in time you will cherish that. Give your self time and space to grieve, it is going to be hard but different to loosing your child.

I’m so sorry, I hope in time that the fact she had enjoyed her day will give you some peace.

So sorry to hear this OP. I still miss my mum after many years . I am a bit older and in discussions with friends we have all said this is the way we would like to go rather than ill in a home or hospital. I hope it brings you comfort that your mum died at home after a lovely day with family . X

I am so so sorry for your loss. I think sudden death is just awful. Its brutal and it completely knocks you for six. I lost my own Mum suddenly a few years ago. Like your Mum she hadn't been ill and showed no signs of not being well. She just died. She wasn't even that old and I definitely thought I had at least another 10 years with her. Then in March this year my Dad also died suddenly. Went to bed and didn't wake up again so I have had to go through it all again.

I totally understand how you must be feeling right now and I know there is absolutely nothing anyone can say that will make you feel better about this right now. You have to ride through the grief.

Sending you massive hugs 🌹💔

Thank you everyone. I was confident after losing our son in the worst possible circumstances that my Mum or Dad's death would be.. softer. Is it the right word? Probably not. I thought I would be more emotionally prepared for it. How wrong was I? 😢 She had just had her 77th birthday and had an amazing life. But I wasn't ready for her to go. 😢

I am not sure we are ever ready to lose our parents. Especially when we have good close and loving relationships with them. I certainly wasn't ready to lose mine. It changes you. Because you lose one of the people in the World who love you unconditionally and it leaves you feeling a little vulnerable. Well it did me. Like I had somehow lost some stability in my life.

Its brutal, that's for sure. Its a cliche but one step at a time, one day at a time and hopefully you will begin to process what has happened.

Oh I’m so sorry for your loss

Oh I am so very sorry.Lost my mum equally unexpectedly last year and understand your absolute shock. I take comfort that she had a quick passing and didn't suffer,and it sounds like your mum was the same. Sending love.

So sorry for your loss. So shocking for you and hard to take in. My own dear Mum died a month ago after a very short illness. I take comfort in the fact that she was well up until the last few days of her life.

Be kind to yourself take each day as it comes. It is such a lot to process.

I am so sorry for your loss 🌷
I lost my mum unexpectedly 5 months ago. She went up for a bath and never came back downstairs. My poor Dad found her in the bathroom half an hour later. She wasn't ill. She'd been out with my daughter that day for lunch and was perfectly fine.
The shock is something that you just can't get your head around.
Like others have said, in time, you will hopefully take some comfort in the fact that she didn't suffer and wasn't in pain. Although at the moment this is not easy to do. Thinking of you.xx

So sorry for your loss of your mum sending you sincere condolences she sounds like a lovely person and you gave her a wonderful evening take care

So sorry for your loss.

I lost my mum suddenly just over 4 weeks ago, it's just the most horrendous pain.

I hope you're surrounded with love and support.

I'm so sorry OP. There are no words that will make you feel better right now but it sounds like your Mum went out in the best possible way, without illness or pain or suffering. It means you didn't get to say goodbye but perhaps you'll come to believe that was a good trade-off. My condolences to you and all her loved ones.

So sorry for your loss of your mum she sounds like a lovely lady take care 💅

I am so sorry for your loss.
Losing our beloved mums is one of the worst life events a person can go through.
Like others have said, your mum went peacefully, after having spent lovely time with her family. She was obviously happy and well loved by you all.

I'm sure if we could choose a way to die, most would choose such a way....but I know that doesn't lessen your grief right now.
I hope in the future it will. x