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Bereavement

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No village

1 reply

Mama1209 · 12/09/2024 09:23

Hi I’m an only child. From a very small family. My dad passed away when I was little from alcoholism/ suicide. I never had any contact with his family. My mum has struggled with mental health/ addiction so isn’t in a position to help me with my children. I only have 1 nana and she’s elderly, I’m close with her but again, she’s not in a position to help me, it’s more the other way round, which I don’t mind as she has done so much for me growing up. My 1st partner (my eldest dad) also died of an heart attack when she was little. Although I’m not close to my in laws - they are elderly too. My FIL just passed away this week, meaning my husband is obviously otherwise occupied with his mum etc. Or when he’s home, he’s grieving so I don’t like to ask for help from him. Basically I have 3 kids (4 inc a step child) and I just feel so alone, like a single parent. I work part time too in a very demanding job and my husband didn't help much before and I was already struggling with my mental & physical health because of this, now it’s not at all. I’ve worked myself into the ground this week, whilst also trying to be there for my MIL. Popping round, helping with housework / making tea for guests etc. Today I’m off work, but have my toddler with me - who still doesn’t sleep through the night - and I’m so poorly! Been sick, have a cold, and I just need a few hours to sleep!! What do people do who like me, have no village/ no help/ no support? I don’t even have anyone to talk to as I’m just here trying to be strong for everyone else and hold it all together!

OP posts:
whatwindow · 12/09/2024 09:29

This must be so hard for you, what a horrible time. It’s difficult having little or no support, are your children in childcare? I would recommend looking at local pre schools for your toddler on your non working days to give you a bit of a beak. They are usually short hours (9-3) in term time and very reasonable cost wise.

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