Dad - I ache.

[Flyhigher]

Dad died 10 Feb.
I ache.
Anyone else feel like this. How long does it last?

[DoAWheelie]

January 10th for me. The first 6 weeks were the hardest then day by day it got slightly easier. I found I only thought about him once or twice a day instead of several times an hour.

I don't think the ache ever really goes away you just slowly start getting bigger and bigger gaps between.

[MoonWoman69]

So sorry for your loss. Grief hits us all differently, it's the nature of the game unfortunately. I lost my dad last June and it hits me in waves. He suffered for the last weeks of his life, he was never going to recover, so his passing was a blessing, but it doesn't lessen the sense of immense loss.
It does get better with time and you will swing between all the stages - guilt, anger, sadness etc.
You will never forget him, but as time passes, you find it gets easier to cope with. Make sure you think and talk about him normally. It will help with the healing process. 🤗🌹

[Boxingwhelp]

I didn’t care when my Dad died as he was a nasty piece of work.
Grief is the price you pay for love OP. Sending you best wishes xx

[MrsSucculent]

24.3.24 I don’t know. I’m still early days. It hurts so much. I have no energy and I am
struggling to parent. I have nothing to give.

[stayathomegardener]

10/12/1987 it only catches me now when I think of him missing big achievements, weddings or my daughters birth.
Although seeing his writing is a trigger too.
So sorry for your loss.

[stayathomegardener]

@Boxingwhelp

I didn’t care when my Dad died as he was a nasty piece of work.
Grief is the price you pay for love OP. Sending you best wishes xx

So well put.

[FisksSpareSuit]

Do you have somewhere to focus your grief? It might sound daft but for me, a beautiful shrub, planted in a massive pot (so you can take it with you if you move) is a very helpful memorial. You can care for it in honour of him, watch it flourish, talk to it or sit with a cup of tea beside it and spend fifteen minutes just remembering him.

Maybe you need a memorial - doesn't have to be a religious service. Just organise a get together of everyone who loved him, and ask everyone to contribute something they associate with him - could be a song to listen to or sing, a dish of food he loved, an anecdote about him, a wonderful picture of him blown up into a large size and framed. Take turns to share what you brought and then just reminisce about him.

[Sewaccidentprone]

My df died when I was in my early 20’s. It was approx 3 years before I didn’t cry every day.

i still think about him most days even though it was a number of decades ago.

I also made some really poor decisions within the 1st few months, so be kind to yourself and don’t make any rash decisions.

[Blingismything]

My mum died very suddenly and it took four years for the pain to soften.

[FisksSpareSuit]

I still chat to my dad sometimes. He died two years ago. I forget what it was, but something reminded me of him the other day as I was walking upstairs and I just looked at the clouds through the window and told him about it. May sound daft but it feels like a connection to him.

[Flyhigher]

I talk to him too. Oh no. That's setting me off crying again! X

[Flyhigher]

@Sewaccidentprone

My df died when I was in my early 20’s. It was approx 3 years before I didn’t cry every day.

i still think about him most days even though it was a number of decades ago.

I also made some really poor decisions within the 1st few months, so be kind to yourself and don’t make any rash decisions.

😢🙏🌹

[Flyhigher]

He always sent roses. 🌹

[PenguinTime]

02/12/22, my dad passed unexpectedly. I’m not going to sugar coat it OP, last year was dark and incredibly sad, but it does get better.
I still get caught by events and things that remind me of him; ranging from big things like birthdays to small things like our new bathroom being finished and never being about to show him. I miss him everyday.

Talking to him can help, talking about him might help too. I’m sorry for your loss x

[NearlyBritishSummertimeYay]

@Flyhigher

im sorry to hear about your Dad.

my Dad died in 2010 of a sudden, massive, heart attack.

i still can't talk about him without crying & im easily triggered (im crying now) , but it does become something that learn to live with, it's not so 'front & centre' as it is at first.

Everyone is different so no one else's timeline is going to help you. Just know it won't always be this intense 🌷🌷

[shellyleppard]

So sorry for your loss. Lost my mum 16 months ago. The grief is getting easier but sometimes i hear a certain song and my heart physically aches. The grief never goes away but it does get easier to live with. Sending the biggest virtual hugs x

[Isometimeswonder]

4 years since losing mum.
Does the ache go away? No, not completely.
But it gets less raw as time passes. I can talk with dad or brother about her, and not cry automatically now.
I'm sorry for everyone who has this loss... but it's the flip side of love. X

[Pinkpromise]

Just wanted to say I’m so sorry for everyone’s losses.
My dad died this morning so I’m in the early stages but I have never known pain like it.
Thinking of you all 💐

[Minimink]

I'm 13 months on from losing my dad and the grief is far less than it was. I no longer feel bereft but I miss him so much still. The grief hits me in waves but in a different way.

[Minimink]

I'm sorry for you loss OP.

[Thmssngvwlsrnd]

@Pinkpromise

Just wanted to say I’m so sorry for everyone’s losses.
My dad died this morning so I’m in the early stages but I have never known pain like it.
Thinking of you all 💐

I'm so sorry for your loss. My Dad died on Sunday so I know how you feel 💐x

[mrssunshinexxx]

Sorry for your loss op.
I lost my mum 4 years ago this month when I was 27 and pregnant with my first baby. Took me til about 6 months ago to not cry every day. 6 months before that it was several times a day. It broke my heart

[Roselilly36]

So sorry for your loss OP, it’s incredibly painful, and still early days. Cry when you need to. The grief doesn’t ever get easier, but in time, becomes less raw. I still have moments but now I focus on happy memories rather than the trauma of the loss.

[YearsofYears]

I'm sorry about your loss OP and to the others who lost here. I lost my Dad in mid January after a quick cancer battle and I'm still navigating the loss.
I have good days and bad days. The good days I think about happy memories and he makes me smile. On the tough days my memories of his illness and decline are extremely upsetting. Sometimes I just want to call him up and chat...
I'm taking it as it comes. I have a beautiful candle that I light regularly and think about him. We had an amazing relationship and I know the best tribute going forward is going to be remembering that and living well.

[Hillfarmer]

My lovely dad died in mid-January and I am feeling very sad and generally incompetent this week - do the two go together? I loved him very much.

I just don't know how to calibrate this experience. Is this still 'early days'? It's nearly 3 months now...where am I in the process? What's the timetable of grief? I want there to be some sort of framework to put around this, so I can somehow decide where I am in it.

I feel so alone. I feel as if I should be functioning better and I'm not. So then I'm impatient with myself that I'm not functioning and maybe I am just lazy and incompetent. There's things I should be doing. The kids are home for Easter holidays. Single parent. I have a brother but he is not on the same page, so don't feel able to talk to him. My children are sympathetic but I don't want to burden them with me weeping all over the place. They get fed but I feel like I just want to hide most of the time.