OK this is morbid and anticipatory - but I am in a quandrey

[KatyMac]

My Nana is very poorly
She is 91, has Altziemers and fell down a flight of stairs (at her EMI home)last Saturday

She is still in 'shock' and it looks like she might die

I am a bit ambivalent about that as I'm not sure she has any quality of life & she doesn't even recognise me when I go in so it might be a 'good' thing iyswim

But as favoured (& only) granddaughter I have always been told I was inheriting her piano & I don't know if I want it

It will take a lot of space, DD has a very nice keyboard (with proper keys - whatever they are - but I remember it was important when we bought it)

& feel ungrateful because I should want it - but I really don't

It has always been some vague point in the future before but now it seems imminent & I'm panicking

Oh Hell I'm not even sure why I'm posting - it's a particularly evil shade of bright gold wood

My dad died of Alzheimers disease about 18 mths ago. You do grieve twice (at least) - when you "lose" the person and when they actually die, because of the loss of the person you loved.

And although it was a "release" for him to die it was still terribly distressing and upsetting for all of us, far too much for thoughts of inheritance or even tbh practicalities - although mum and dad had been v organised with wills completed and DNR arranged.

A keyboard is obviously a practical and less bulky way of learning music than a piano but tbh we wouldn't be without ours (not an heirloom!) even though it's not the most elegant thing in the world. Your daughter may love the idea of having it (not sure how old she is) and perhaps you could as someone has suggested give it to someone/an organisation on a long-term loan.

Wishing your Nana a peaceful end to her life, xx

im not being harsh at all. i dont agree with what is being said and ive said so just like u don't agree with me Mrspanic. Saying the family and eveyone is praying for a swift death isnt a nice thing to say especially about ur own flesh and blood,and to strangers aswell. I didnt want to come on this but the headline made me curious,after reading on i thought i'd have a say instead of offerin advice bout the piano like evey1 else.Maybe i have been bought up different i dont know

Have you considered incorporating it into the nursery you have opened/are opening (sorry i lose track with stuff ), and hope that you have a musical member of staff?

It's so lovely to have 'proper' music in a childcare seting

I don't think you are odd.

Buzzzybee!

You are clearly in shock and thinking ahead is circumstancially influenced.

I think lending it to somewhere until you are in a position to take it in the future is a great idea.

Off on a tangent here - have just seen your profile katymac and am stunned. I was so so sure you were blonde with a bob!

Sorry to hear about your gran.

Katymac, so sorry to hear this

make the decision practical for you but make sure you wont regret whichever decision you make

perhaps you could have it in the house for a trial run

I wouldnt be thinking about the piano it would be the last thing id be thinking of! I cant believe i'm the only one who thinks that?

O.k im thinking how i would be in that situation just like u are and thats probably why the piano is coming befor the Nan who could die any day and who also has had a bad fall. If the Nan was thinking right im sure she'd be happy at what her only Grandaughter is saying (yeah right!)

I understand too. Your Nana is 91 - it isn't like you are wishing her dead but it is more or less inevitable that she is going to die soon and for some people it helps to be practical, particularly when there is a tight deadline with her care home.

If there is some appeal to you in taking up the piano again, as your nana wanted, how about selling it and using the money to upgrade your key board and maybe use some of the money to have some lessons. I would think your nana would approve of that unless it is the piano itself that she was sentimental about.

Sorry you are having to face this though.

my thoughts are with katymac also and i wish u good luck. Glad u keeping it for a while,ur children will think its great. I wouldn't worry to much. I have to go now,think im in labour

Katymac, you're not being harsh or horrid at all. Ignore those who say you are.

My gran died last year, aged 99, and she'd been fading for some time. She was ready to go and I'm glad that when it came it came quickly and peacefully. I can't imagine what it must be like to have lost them years ago but still have them there.

so sorry to hear about your grandmas fall, how frightening and sad for her.falls impact on the faller and their family

i imagine you are very distressed and scared too and the thoughts of the piano are in fact displacement of your feelings

When my friends gran died she inherited some quie ugly jewellery that she wouldn't have wor, so she sold it and bought some she would wear...can you the same? Sell it and buy something you would use, maybe another keyboard or a different instrument or something else you would like a lot more?