My Grandad just died suddenly of heart attack :(

[MegSophandEmma]

My mum called me to tell me that my grandad had died suddenley of a heart attack. I did love him very much but due to the war between him and my beloved dad, I have always stayed loyal to my dad (my doing). It was things like how my dad strived for years to make him proud but his dad would just go on about my uncle all the time, who quite frankly is a bum never worked or anything. Anyway things have now been left unsaid and its too late for it to be rectified. I am absolutley devistated for my dad as I know he will be hurting so bad now but regarding my grandad being dead I dont know how to feel, I have a horrid knott in side and can't belive I will never see him again but then I start feeling horrid about my dad and start crying. I am writing this down I guess in hope that it will become clear. I am so sad for thm both it should of been sorted and I know my dad is going to draw himself in now and I also worry for my mum as she is a worrier at best of times. God I have had no person in my family die since I was a child this is just horrid. My dad also never had a great relationship with my nana either I hope he will try and build some bridges over time with her now.

thinking of you x

Sounds like a really difficult situation. Hope some good manages to come out of it all in the end, and your dad manages to build a few bridges with his mum.

You are allowed to grieve for your grandad. It's not disloyal to your father. Don't worry about how you should feel (talking to myself as much as you). What you feel is what you feel. Allow your grief to come out. I promise it doesn't lessen the love that you have for your dad!

Thanks all xx

Mars I am so sorry about your recent loss also darling

Its so strange I was talking to my brother last night and he is feeling very simular. He feels more protective of how my dad is feeling and he also feels guilty for not being able to get upset for the loss of grandad himself. I also am having a hard time feeling much empathy for my nana due to the same thing really ffor the fact she abbandand her 8 children when they were little leaving my dad to be rasised by her mother. But morrally (sp?) if thats the right word. I feel I am a bitch for feeling this way.

Going round to see my dad in a wee bit see how hes holding up.

hi hun,
how are you now,ring me if you need me x