Should I send MIL flowers?

[thejadefish]

My FIL died unexpectedly almost a year ago (married 50 years).So far as I know, no-one in the family is planning on marking the anniversary (they might still do so to be fair, they tend to leave things until the last minute). I was thinking of sending MIL flowers on the day to say that we were thinking of her (am at work on the day). Is this ok or would it make the day more painful / emphasise her loss do you think? I want to provide some support but don't want to inadvertently make anything worse. Thanks.

I think that would be lovely.

Yes, I would. She’ll be thinking about it anyway so it won’t be an unexpected memory, and it will be a comfort to know people care.

It sounds nice, can you not encourage your DH to do something or take the flowers round?

I think it's a lovely gesture - she will be thinking about him .

I think this a lovely thought just send them .

I think it's a lovely idea. She'll be thinking of him and it'll be good for her to know others remember the date.

Are you/your husband able to visit with the flowers? It would make it even better! If its too long a journey, at least ring or schedule a Zoom call.

Thank you, I'll send flowers then. DH phones or messages her daily since FIL died to see how she is, maybe a little visit after work would be nice too, thank you all

Definitely

Anniversaries are awful. She'll appreciate it I think. I lost dh 5 years ago and this year was a really bad one. It helps to know other people are aware of it.

Sure she will appreciate that

Anniversaries are hard

When my dh died , the first was hard. As years go on (12 this year) gets a little easier tho still sad on the day

Sometimes the build up is harder then the actual day as the heats go past

That would be very kind and thoughtful.

I'm sure she'd be delighted, I always sent my MIL flowers for mothers day although DH always sent something himself too

Yes I would for sure. If your husband can go round too, I think he should. And if you have a chance to go after work, I'd do that too.

I think it's lovely to do this.

Could your DH take the day off and spend it with her? I've done that the first couple of years after my dad died and my mum has appreciated it, it's a long day for them by themselves (even if they're usually ok).

Would your DH not go round and see her?