Death of a friend and funeral

[itscomplicatedagain]

Hi,
I'd be grateful for any advice.

My friend died a few weeks ago and it was my first contemporary to die and we were close so it's been tough. We are mid forties age.
She didn't have children and wasn't married but had a partner of about 5 years who I have met about 3 or 4 times. We usually met up just by ourselves.

The funeral is this week and I'll probably have to go alone. I'm single. Unfortunately my tricky ex will be there too and I feel anxious about going along by myself.

Do I not go? Or try and persuade a friend to come with me, or go alone- I know some acquaintances will be there, but I know I'll find it upsetting. She died of cancer and I had cancer myself a few years ago and have some survivors guilt around this.
Any advice please?

You should go but I'd take a friend for support. Not everyone knows everyone at funerals so people will just assume you both knew your friend. I'm so sorry for your loss.

Take a friend. Sorry for your loss.

So sorry op...l lost a dear friend to cancer a few years ago and l still miss her so much.

Yes still go and just ignore your ex best you can x

Please do go, out of respect for your friend, and you may find it cathartic to have a good cry. You don't need to stay for the social after the ceremony, just give your condolences to her family and go for a walk somewhere nice afterwards.

Hi Op
Sorry about your loss of a good friend,

Don't worry so much about ex who you feel awkward about,
as usaully at a sombre occasion as this, most people will try to be on best behaviour, and also there will be other people, so less likely, to have to talk as your ex, as he will be surrounded by other people too,

As for surivors guilt ,
Rember you will be there at her funeral , to not only to rember her, but also to celebrate her life too,
Rember even though she is no longer here,
In time,
You will be able to rember how fortunate in life she was to have found a kindred spirit friend in you,
and likewise for yourself to have found a good friend in her

rember in regard of Surivors guilt which is only naturally to have,

Rember even though she is no longer around,
to rember to celebrate her life and what she was about friendship wise,
by making the most of what life has to offer you ,
Wouldn't your good friend have wanted you to make the most of your life, if she was still here too, Op@itscomplicatedagain

Hi Op
Light a candle 🕯 for her in her memory,
there's something about candles that's comforting and reassuring too,

Also meditation is beneficial or being amongst nature in some way too,

Try and get a friend to go with you for support. If you can't then try and still go.

Thank you for the kinds words. I think I will go. Trying to find a friend to come along with me.

Just a little update...I did go and am glad that I did. Took a friend and she drove me so that was nice. Shed many tears but it was healing in a way.

I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my best friend in January and her funeral was in February. My eldest daughter came with me and held me up x

Well done @itscomplicatedagain - you dear friend would have valued your huge effort and the hurdles you overcame.

So sorry for your untimely loss.