Has the death of the queen set anyone else back in their progress of grieving a parent?

[TheMidnightLibrary]

I've struggled for the last couple of years with the death of my last surviving parent. Some days have been worse than others. I have had support and counselling.

I was beginning to have far, far fewer sad days, but since the death of the queen all I can do is cry about my parents.
I feel so sad for the queen's children at the loss of their beloved mother and cannot shake the memories of sitting with both my parents as they died and the horrendous process of making all the arrangements.
Is anyone else in the same position?

Yes, it doesn’t help HMQ died on the anniversary of a parents death.

I think it has set DH back, but he doesn’t face any emotions. He was raised to brush everything under the carpet and now wonders why memories are rearing their ugly faces.

I’m sorry for your loss and hope that you get bank on track very soon.

I've been having some similar emotions.

My father died a few years before my mother, and my mother's death several years ago had the added, and I have to say, somewhat unexpected shock of feeling almost like an orphan, even at my own somewhat advanced age. It is really a major shift in life to not have parents; mine were both in their 90s, so long lives well lived, but it was a deep bereavement. Watching the events of the past few days unfold has really reawakened some of that grief.

My sympathies to everyone else struggling. 💐

Not the same situation but my Nan died on the same day as the Queen and I’ve found it difficult as grief/death is everywhere when it is so fresh. Also knowing I’ll get annual reminders yet conversations won’t be around my Nan.
💐to everyone struggling

Not my parent, but my husband who died suddenly earlier this year. All the talk of coffins and funeral have taken its toll and I am as wet with tears as I was 7 months ago.
My DD pointed out I was so busy sorting everything out at the time that is the after shock of grief.

My MIL died about 6 weeks ago. Poor DP has cried a lot in the last few days. I don't see it as a setback at all, and neither does he - the Queen's death has unlocked some emotions for him that needed to be expressed. That's a really healthy thing, even though it may feel awful at the time. It is ironic, because usually he would have no time for tears about the death of a public figure, and would be harrumphing at the news and wishing people would pull themselves together!

Hugs to everyone who is having difficult feelings at the moment

Yes. The Queen’s funeral is two days before the first anniversary of my mum’s death. On the anniversary itself I’m going to the funeral of my elderly neighbour. Obviously the queen’s children have been incredibly lucky to have their parents into their 60s and 70s, but it must be hard to lose both within 18 months. It doesn’t feel like it’s happening, though. I probably need to crack on with starting therapy.

Not a parent, but ex husband / children’s father. who took his life earlier this year. I’ve spent months trying to forget about funeral planning and avoiding sad music etc but now it’s everywhere. Given me a real, what’s the point of living feeling, we just die anyway 😔

It's definitely set mum back.she has alzheimers and was already struggling to adapt. She can't cope with streaming services so has limited choice of TV channels and this has knocked her totally sideways. DB is trying to organise a GP appointment she is so depressed but her GP is on leave due back on 19th so it will be Tuesday before he can sort anything.

Yes, I agree with this, my wonderful late MIL died a year ago, the Queens death has also made me think about my Nan who passed many years ago, she so admired the Queen, so lots of thoughts of her too.

I have been tearful for the last few days and keep having to gather myself and try not to breakdown crying while working or in front of my kids. I lost my Dad 3 years ago nearly to the day of the Queen passing and my mum over 20 years ago, but both still hurt. Grief is hard. I am not even a royalist but the Queen passing, watching the news, reading the updates online, is just setting me off.

Not for me. One of my parents died recently. The fuss and scale of the enforced national mourning makes me glad that we did direct to crem with no funeral at all. I don't connect her death to my Dads as it's completely different.

My mum died about three months' ago and although I'd felt sad it was nothing like the avalanche of panic feelings and intense sadness I'm experiencing now.
I'm in my sixties but inside feel about four years' old. I'm finding it hard to deal with - maybe it was a mistake watching the rolling tv coverage of the Queen's family and 'feeling' their grief. Sending lots of compassion to everyone who's suffering no matter what stage their grief is at.

My dm passed away last week. I’ve not been watching much tv coverage as I’m so emotional at the moment. My df passed away 5 years ago, so I don’t have any parents left. I’m not coping too well. We’re booked with the funeral home tomorrow. Dm knew what she wanted, so that takes some stress away.

So glad to read this thread. Mum loved the queen and died not long ago. She was old I guess so ..but I’m struggling to untangle my emotions. The as someone called it, ‘enforced mourning’ isn’t helping. That and no one is reporting on the new pm. It just feels like I/ we have been cut loose and are floating away holding onto the string of a balloon. I so want to come back.

Yes it’s bringing back some difficult feelings for me. It is normal & healthy though apparently, so I m taking some comfort from that. I really empathise with the RF as well. I remember exactly how it felt for me.

Is it a setback though, or a helpful way to express some suppressed grief?

Yes.

My mum only died a few months ago.

Didn't help that when the news flash came through about Queens death I was sat in same places I was when mum died. Same day if the week so at training with ds.

Weirdly no. My Mum even looked a bit like the Queen, with the white hairdo. I thought I'd be more upset as it only been 2 years since I lost Mum. I do feel bad for the royals, I remember how awful it was. But the Queen was 96, she had what sounds like a quick death, surrounded by her loved ones. If this had happened only a few months after Mum died it would have felt much worse, its such a horrible first year, at least for me. Its okay to feel whatever you feel.

Yes. My parent died a few months ago and I've been in floods since Thursday. Very strange for me as we're not fans of the royals in my culture but I'm so touched by the visibility of the nation's grief, as well as her family's.

Absolutely, I've done some proper ugly crying for my gran who passed away years ago. I can't quite get my ahead around it, the emotions just took hold and I so desperately wanted to see her again.

Like @Wotagain, not a parent but my DH, he died six months ago and I am finding it really hard at the moment.

Sending a huge hug.

One of the people I line manage has been struggling, as it is the first anniversary of losing their mother.