lolly07766 · 07/06/2022 08:21
I was hoping someone could help me on here. My father passed away on 13th May.
We weren't very close but I loved him nonetheless. He didn't have much to do with us growing up and I have very few memories of him.
I had visited him more in later life, however visits were always short as I have a son with a learning disability and autism and always had to get back to him, my father lived some way away from us.
His partner has asked me to speak at his funeral, my brother is reading the eulogy but I'm at a loss of what to say.
I was thinking maybe a nice piece of poetry rather than memories of what a good father he was as he wasn't.
Any help will be gratefully received
Picoloangel · 07/06/2022 12:50
I am so sorry for your loss. I have a similar relationship with my Dad and always struggle with things like Fathers Day as the gushing and complimentary messages don’t sit right with me. I think a piece of poetry sounds perfect. I hope that the funeral brings some closure and that your part in it brings you some comfort.
I have always imagined that losing a parent to whom you are not close and who has not always been there for you, is actually harder as it must give rise to some complex feelings. I dread my Dad going, because he was a fantastic father once, but hasn’t been for a very very long time. I’ve done all I reasonably could to fix things but have come to terms with the fact that our fractured relationship was not my fault and that I have done all I could in the circumstances. We have to live with the consequences of our parents’ decisions but they are not our fault. Good on you for visiting him when you could and for being open to doing a reading at his funeral. I hope it all goes well. X 💐
Wingedharpy · 07/06/2022 13:20
Apologies if I've got this wrong OP, but I assume you're looking for recommendations for a piece of poetry which would be appropriate given the circumstances which you describe.
Google "His journey's just begun" by Ellen Brenneman.
That may work for you.
Eckno · 07/06/2022 20:37
So sorry for your loss.
Could you find a poem or piece of writing that reflects his interests and hobbies rather than one about relationships and leaving behind loved ones? So more of a celebration of who he was rather than what you shared?
Good luck. I hope you find something that works x
Eckno · 07/06/2022 20:43
This website has lots of poems covering many themes.
lolly07766 · 07/06/2022 21:54
Yes it's very difficult isn't it, I'm sorry you're in a similar situation.
I thought he may have tried to make things up with his grandchildren (my children) but it was no different.
They're all grown up now, and will be attending the funeral with me.
Thank-you for your kind words, I feel sad but not the gut wrenching incredible sadness I felt when my mum passed.
lolly07766 · 07/06/2022 21:55
I just looked the poem up, Thank-you for the suggestion, it seems very fitting
lolly07766 · 07/06/2022 21:56
That's a great idea, he loved sport, especially cricket, maybe I can find something along those lines 😊
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