Texting loved ones

[Helenbackagain3]

Just sent a couple of texts to my son who I lost 5 months ago. He would have been 21 this week. It’s actually quite therapeutic to do this, even though, obviously, he doesn’t reply. Just wondering if anyone else does this, or am I the only mad mother. Love to all on the bereavement threads. Xxx

I've often thought about texting my cousin, but I fear not seeing the blue ticks would hurt too much. I'm glad it helped you

You are not the only one @Helenbackagain3.(((hugs)))

Thank goodness for that !

Thank you. And sorry for the loss of your cousin. X

@rolypolydoly.

So sorry to hear this OP. I've never done this but I probably will

I have lost two daughters. They were babies so not the same pain as texting them and never getting a reply again

Sounds so silly but I don't delete any WhatsApp messages from my nan anymore. She isn't dying. But I'm terrified of losing her and I suppose in my head I think I'll be able to re read it all again if she dies on me Anytime soon.

It's my biggest fear.

Sorry to jump on your thread this way. I'm so sorry about your son. I have a son too and the thought of losing him kills me. You must be an incredibly strong person

Take care and text away

Hi op I am so sorry for your loss.

Me and dad did text mum. She died in December. We text alot during the day when she was here and its something I miss.

I have stopped though. I found nor getting a reply painful. Somewhere my brain kept saying 'why hasn't she text back?' And I would go to check she had read it.

That split second of realisation was so upsetting, I couldn't keep doing it. Its still brings dad alot of comfort and it did me for a while.

You definitely aren't mad. If its therapeutic for you, keep doing it.

I used to sometimes call the phone of the child I lost. I have it here, it's dead, so I know it's not ringing somewhere randomly. I've stopped as that number is likely to be assigned to someone else now.

I don't think it's unusual. I think it's very common. I took over a social media page of theirs and saw some people sent messages. I didn't read them and closed the account down so it's there to look at but no-one, including myself, can access the account to do anything with it now. I don't know if people still send messages.

My husband passed away in 2012 and his mobile number is still in my head now.
Some things never leave your thoughts.

I did this just very recently. This was mostly how we communicated latterly (FB messenger) and so I went somewhere that we had spent time together, where I know reminded him of me too, and I sent a message telling him I was there, how much I loved him, that this would be my place to remember him.

It helped a little, on that day.

Not unreasonable at all. You might be in control of his account still but bear in mind mobile numbers eventually get reassigned after accounts are closed.

Not sure how long it takes. I had this with an old therapist once- didn't know she died and got a reply from someone else random.

Yes, i do/have done this, although it is heartbreaking seeing they never get read.

I did when my son had first died ..told him how much I loved him and missed him

Sorry for not replying until now. Thank you all for your kind messages. I texted him again tonight to say how much I loved him. I have his phone back now, so might try and get it unlocked.

@Helenbackagain3

Just sent a couple of texts to my son who I lost 5 months ago. He would have been 21 this week. It’s actually quite therapeutic to do this, even though, obviously, he doesn’t reply. Just wondering if anyone else does this, or am I the only mad mother. Love to all on the bereavement threads. Xxx

Yes I do this too. I lost my son five years ago and I send him texts from time to time. It's a comfort.

My dad died the Thursday morning. Dh me and dd had arranged to camp for that weekend. It'd been booked for a while. After checking my brother was OK with this we set off. I always without fail let my dad know when we were away. My finally text to my dad was "arrived safely. Hope you did too. Love you" I kept that message on my phone.

For you op

My DH texts his dad who died 7 years ago on his birthday & Christmas & I’ve seen him do it on “stupid” occasions like sending the football scores now & then too.

When my DM passed, a few people still sent long test messages to her phone before we had switched it off.

Thank you. And lovely to hear your story. X

My 13yr old niece texts her mum who died in October