Struggling with lonliness

[NicolePear]

I'm really struggling since losing my mum last month. Since my husband leaving me 3 years ago she had become my rock and even though she had been ill for a while her passing was still unexpected and a shock. I was struggling with the loneliness of being a single mum anyway and now I feel so desperately alone. My dad is obviously coping with his own grief so I have to try and show a brave face to him. I do have a sister but she can be quite wrapped up with her little family and she has never understood how lonely I am as a single mum. Friends have been supportive but none are local and I just spend each night crying by myslef once the kids are in bed. It's bringing back all the pain of my husband leaving me and all I do is wish him back again just to have some support. Does anyone have any advice with how to cope please?

No advice I'm afraid but I can tell you you're not alone. I'm the same and I get how hard it is for you.

You've suffered a huge amount of loss in a short space of time. It's traumatic for even the strongest of people. My heart is out for you, wherever you are.

I'd be wary about going back to a previous relationship. Instead, can you join a group nearby? There are bereavement groups run across the UK, some in churches, others in community spaces. You need to be with people who understand loss and grief. It's a very particular pain.

I promise that things won't always be like this xxx

Thank you for your support

@FTstepmum

You've suffered a huge amount of loss in a short space of time. It's traumatic for even the strongest of people. My heart is out for you, wherever you are.

I'd be wary about going back to a previous relationship. Instead, can you join a group nearby? There are bereavement groups run across the UK, some in churches, others in community spaces. You need to be with people who understand loss and grief. It's a very particular pain.

I promise that things won't always be like this xxx

I might look for a local group thank you and thanks for your kind words

I'm so sorry for your loss OP sounds like so much change, upset and upheavel all in a short amount of time. My best advice is to be gentle with yourself, you are doing your best in really difficult circumstances. And you are being strong for your DC which whilst lovely, takes a toll... You're amazing x Sending so much love to you x

OP, so sorry for your loss of your mum. Join the app Frolo, it's for single parents who support each other. There are zoom meetings and you can meet other single parents in your area if you would like to when and if you're ready. It's so nice to be able to talk to other single parents about lots of things.

It's a nice community.

Sorry for your loss. I miss my mum too but it gets easier. Stay strong. X

Definitely be gentle on yourself as blurp says.

Also, thinking about it, I would consciously try not to hide your feelings from your dad and your sister. I did that when my parents died (I was the "strong one") but it delayed my grieving for a long time.

They are your family and should acknowledge your pain too. It's a time for pulling together and supporting each other.

If your dad and sister can't do that well, give and take whatever comfort you can from each other.

I'll keep you in my prayers in the coming days and weeks. Xxx