How to support a grieving child?

[Bottl]

I'm wondering if anyone has any advice for me please?

My dear friend died last month, unexpectedly. Her dc is 6. He has access to a counsellor at school but I wonder if there is somewhere that could offer support to dfriend's dh to help their dc?

I would also be interested in finding ways to help support them. He tells me he misses his mum and as much as I let him know that I acknowledge this and also miss her, I don't know if that's enough. It feels like he's asking me for more but I have no idea what I should/could be telling him.

His dad asked if I thought he should put all her photos away because he felt the constant reminder was making things worse and that removing things like this was a normal thing to do in his culture when someone dies. My instinct was to say not to do that but again, no idea what would be the right thing to do.

Any advice or suggestions would be much appreciated.

I lost a parent at quite a young age. I think something to remember is that you can't fix this, and nothing you do will be enough to fix is because nothing will bring her back . I only say that to encourage you not to feel pressure to do and say all the right things. What you're already doing is so wonderful and caring, and your friend would, I'm sure, be incredibly grateful that you're thinking of how to support her little one.

Another thing is to think long term, not just right now. Stay in the child's life and make it really clear that you are there for him, should he ever want to talk or just be with someone who knew his Mum, or need help that a Mum might normally offer. I had a couple of adults tell me this at the time and it was very reassuring to know I had other adults in my corner.

Put words around it like, "you can say to me, I have something to ask about Mummy, or can we have a chat, I need help". So that he's got a bit of a starting point if he's not sure. And then keep telling him over the years.

You sound like a lovely friend and I'm so sorry for your loss.

My DH lost his mum at the same age please please please don’t get rid of photos of her.

That is what was done with him he has no memories of her at all.

Contact Winston’s Wish and talk to them they
are fab.