My boyfriend lost his mother about a month ago. He seems to have shut down completely and I am not sure what to do.
Initially I sent him a supportive ‘thinking of you’ or ‘here if you need anything today’ text every few days to which he replied to all of them. He was open in telling me how he felt about losing his mother. I went to see him and we just sat and talked about his mother. We have been together for a year and this is the first time anything big like this has happened. It is also the first time he really has been openly vulnerable in front of me. He mentioned how people kept messaging and he doesn't feel like talking so as I left him I said that I will text him but there is no pressure for him to reply to me.
Since then he has shut down even more. I know I told him its Ok not to reply (and I really did mean it) but I am finding it hard on my end. Sometimes I do ask myself is it annoying him that I contact him or does he appreciate it and need that from me? He hasn’t asked for space or to be left alone but I have just assumed that this is what he needs and time to be with his family so I have taken a back seat. I dont even know how often I should be trying to visit him right now or if I should back off completely. I know he is grieving and this isn’t so much about me and us right now but I cant help but worry if we will make it through this