Guilt

[Hotpinkangel19]

How do you deal with the guilt after someone dies? It's been 3 years since they both died and I'm still feeling guilty, and angry. I should have known, I should have forced them to get to the doctors, was telling the doctors to stop treatment the right thing to do? Why didn't I notice? I'd give anything to sit with my parents and ask these questions. And tell them how sorry I am.

@Hotpinkangel19 I’ve just seen your post and wanted to reply because it struck such a chord with me. I’m being eaten up with guilt too over things I didn’t do, things I just didn’t realise might be important at the time.

I don’t have any answers yet. People keep telling me I have nothing to reproach myself for but it doesn’t stop me feeling that I failed my darling mum at the end, after I’d done everything I could to protect her for years. I don’t know whether those feelings will ever completely go away.

I’m sorry, this isn’t much use to you but I just wanted you to know you’re not alone. We all look back and think we could have swooped in and changed things but honestly, I doubt we could, really. But our minds force us to replay it over and over, to try and produce that better outcome.

I’ve wondered whether I might end up having counselling - is that a possibility for you?

I really feel for you.