Will it always be this way?

[Bookaholic73]

3 years ago my therapist died.

I had been seeing her for 5 years, and she helped me to move on from a very abusive childhood and eating disorder.

She was a wonderful woman, and I expect there was a bit of transference there, but we were close and grew very friendly (in a professional way, obviously).

Today, on the way home from work, a song came on the radio that i always associated with her/our relationship, and I cried like a baby.

It’s been 3 years but it felt so raw and like it had only just happened.
Does this still happen to other people after 3 years?

Not many people will have lost a therapist but I can imagine that as well are your high regard for her, the fact that she supported you through trauma will make her loss particularly hard for you. There is no singular correct way to grieve. It's important to remember that.

Not many people will have lost a therapist but I can imagine that as well are your high regard for her, the fact that she supported you through trauma will make her loss particularly hard for you. There is no singular correct way to grieve. It's important to remember that.

@Hotwaterbottlelove thanks for your reply.
She felt like less of a therapist and more like a good friend. But I guess lots of clients feel that way!
Thanks again for the kind words.

I am a therapist (despite the incongruous username!). I just want to add my perspective. I sometimes grieve the clients I lose, yes there's a lot of transeference in therapy but isn't there always? Although it's a unusual relationship, it is still a relationship. OP it sounds like you were close to your therapist, and I imagine what you had with her was meaningful for her too. I'm sorry you've lost her .

@FatArse123 (oh I don’t like calling you that!) thanks for the reply. It’s odd because I know she was fond of me. Not in a creepy or unethical way, just a friendly.
When she found out how ill she was (she was diagnosed just 6 weeks before her death) we sat and had a cup of tea in her garden, where she urged me to find another therapist after she was gone.
It’s funny because I could never cry in front of anyone, including her, but I bawled like a baby with the new therapist.