what actually happens when you m/c

[iliketosleep]

I have had some fresh red blood last night but it had stopped by 7 this morning, if it is m/c what am i supposed to expect?

We started TTC immediately after my miscarriage (well two weeks later) because they scanned me and told me we were fine to start TTC again. I was devastated when AF turned up - I felt like I was having another miscarriage.

Having said that, I didn't have a D&C.

So sorry to hear of your miscarriage.

After my first m/c I was told to wait 3 months and after my second 2 months so I asked my GP who said if your body was ready to be pregnant you would conceive and if not it wouldn't so to try as soon as I wanted. It just made dating it trickier for the doctors but as my cycle is not a 28 day one I always had to have dating scans anyway and not trying to make it easier for the doctors wasn't an option! DD2 was conceived as soon as I ovulated after second miscarriage and is now 10 months old. It did mean though that in effect I was pregnant for 50 weeks out of 52 in a year which was tough.

i think we will be trying to concieve again as soon as i stop bleeding, Im hoping i chose the best option of letting it go naturally rather than a d&c or the tablets. Im pretty sure its started now, i think my body was double checking that the foetus was dead before it let it go or my mind was keeping it in. Im not making sense I know what i mean lol

agree with belogo iirc - just had my first AF post 3rd m/c and it was horrid.

on the other hand thou post 2nd m/c 2 weeks after I stopped bleeding OV'ed nad had DS 9 monhts later so what feels right for you go wiht that.

just quick for now but will stop in and see how you are tomorrow.

my email is [email protected]. anytime you want to talk i'm here.

I know what you mean - my baby had died at 7+ when I was 8+ bleeding started at 8+ think it was my body's way iycwim. was odd as looking back I had pre AF symptoms instead of PG ones

They medical bods like you to wait for one cycle mostly because it makes it easier for dates if you fall pregnant straight away.

The other thing you need to be aware of with a "natural" MC is that everything has been passed or you could get an infection. It is very obvious when you have passed the main bit. Sorry to be graphic but forwarned is forearmed as they say. I bet it was a man who said that thinking about it!!!.

As everybody else has said look after yourself and we are all here for you when you need us.

no problem ronshar that was my main reason for the thread i want to know exactly what to expect!! In which way is it obvious?

Sorry to hear it was not good news ILTS
You will find lots of support on here - just take it one day at a time, sometimes I am fine, the next minute something sets me blubbing. (in fact looking at lots of the posters below - we were all comforting each other just a matter of days/weeks ago)
I do hope the natural way works for you but don't worry if not - I had my evac on Monday and it was fine, really.
You will be very welcome on the TTC after MC threads - I will be on those v soon I know.
Come back and chat whenever you need too and love to your dp too - it is different for them but still v hard.

ILTS they probably measured the sac/baby for you today at the scan? - often you can pass this in one go so will feel it and may see something - just be prepared.
When I was waiting for it to happen naturally the hosp told me to 'save' anything that came out if I could so they could check all had come out. Also they offer to send with other miscarried babies' remains for a joint cremation if this is what you want. Don't know if you have even thought about that so soon but it is another practical issue.
With regard to starting again my midwife said 'as soon as you stop bleeding completely and feel ready'
Hope some of this is of some help

thanks that has helped alot! Also is the pain bad before you start geting clots?

I am sorry to hear of your loss

I think each m/c is different for everyone for me the pain felt like period pain / cramping (figures!).

You will be ok and you will find much support from fellow mn if you want it .

with my second it was all pretty much a thte same time. with my third I passed the sac in relativly no pain but had bad pains beofre passing the placenta (clot) then another few days until one last clot and the pain subsided - however the pain did ease up after passing the placenta.

will add you to my msn tomorrow and will chat then.

(pips)

Hi iliketosleep

How are you doing. I had a d&c so i dont know what i natural miscarriage would be like. I dont think any of the options are great and you have to do what is right for you.

Although i totally fell apart after my mc (and i mean totally!!) - three weeks later i am already feeling alot happier - so things do get better. I am enjoying TTC again - we didnt do it much when pregnant because i was bleeding quite regularly. Poor DH is upstairs asleep . I am also enjoying drinking wine again.

(Waves to Jackstini)

I've just read your other thread - just to let you know i felt the same - sounds awful but i didnt want to be walking around with my dead baby in me. It sounds like your mc is starting and hopefully it will be over quickly xx

lol am i the only person on here that doesnt drink????

im still weighing up my options as i just want it over and done with quick IYSWIM

Quicker we can get on with ttc again

oh god i sound as if i dont care

iliketosleep ... I can tell you what to expect if you really really want to know.
I had an m/c at 12 weeks but the baby was 10 weeks size.
Put it this way, if it ever happened again I would choose to have an ERPC ...
I know people who have had m/c at less than 8 weeks and say that it was no more than a heavy period but mine was way more than that

Sorry for you loss sweetie

not at all ILTS - I felt the same. That's why I ended up having a D&C when it didn't go naturally - wanted to get on with things!

That is exactly why i had the ERPC - i just wanted it over and also didnt want to experience losing the baby. Also wanted it all sorted so could TTC again. There is no right or wrong way to think or feel when having a mc - you just have to do what is right for you.

oh and - yes you probaby are the only person on here that doesnt drink

Ghosty - I have to agree lost mine "naturally" at 9+6 and there was no mistaking what had happened

ILTS - my friend had the option and chose to wait and after 2 weeks then went to hospital for d&c

ghosty - no mistake for me either. and I was 'only' 7+ i'd sooner not have any more babies than have a natural M/c again - as I say at 5 weeks it was clotting and a lot of bleeding 7+ I saw everything and it brok me in two

iliketosleep - really sorry to hear your news. You've had such a rollercoaster ride over the last month - so sad it ended this way.

I decided on the medical management way of speeding things up, because my body had shown absolutely no sign of noticing that the baby had stopped developing many weeks before, and I couldn't face waiting. It wasn't a great experience, and with hindsight I wish I'd opted for the D&C.

I agree with the other posters, that you will know when it happens properly. My bean was very much smaller than yours, and I felt it coming out. Grim McGrim.

You seem to be coping remarkably well, maybe because you have had so long of uncertainty, you've had chance to get used to the idea that the outcome wouldn't not be good. Still, do make sure you take time to grieve, and don't expect too much of yourself. As someone else said, your hormones are all over the place. Emotionally, I crashed a few days after the procedure. I'm feeling more positive now, but this may well just be temporary.

Having said that, feeling like an emotional train wreck isn't compulsory, so if you can avoid it, that would be great.

Hope it all happens soon and painlessly.

iliketosleep - so so sorry to hear of your news, as you will remember I was on the Due in March thread with you and had a mc 4 weeks ago.

I had a natural one and I'm not going to lie to you it was pretty traumatic. I had 3 days of very heavy bleeding no pain as such but I felt really weak at times. After that I had about 2 weeks of bleeding.

I have recovered physically but emotionally it has been harder than I ever thought it would be. I think the shock of having the mc has worn off (I have two DC already) and I'm now at the grieving total loss stage. I feel so empty and raw inside. It's hard seeing babies as well.

I think I have actually started my AF this morning so less than 4 weeks since the mc which I'm shocked about. We have decided to try again but we waited until after the bleeding had stopped but I must have ov-ed whilst still bleeding. I'm amazed your body gets over things so fast.

Theres a brilliant thread on ttc after mc July/August it's called it truly has kept me going the support has been fantastic.

Sorry forgot to say my baby died at 6+2 weeks and I found out for sure at 9 I never saw anything so didn't know when I had passed the sac or when the actual mc happened.

I didn't really have a choice to have a natural/ERPC but if it happened again I think I would choose the ERPC to be honest.

shagalot - I also had a miscarriage at just over 7 weeks. I saw 'everything', having had braxton hicks type contractions. I had been told to expect a 'heavy period', but it was a lot more then that; The embryo/fetus in a sac about the size of a walnut shell. And a second piece that was the placenta. I buried it all in the garden. I was shocked.

I some countries they have offical cemeteries for miscarried babies - Ireland I think.