After the funeral

[BlueThesaurusRex]

I feel really disappointed after my dads funeral- I was looking forward to meeting his former colleagues and old friends but nobody spoke to me at the reception (many didn’t even attend, just came to the service). I tried to speak to people but most just stayed in their own groups and didn’t stay for very long.
I haven’t got my mum anymore, I was his closest relative and I just felt really ostracised. I arranged the funeral and reception and made sure everybody knew what was happening and now I just feel deflated.

I know the day was about my dad and not me and I even feel a bit silly/spoiled for mentioning this but I think I just needed to get it off my chest :( feel free to give me a kick if you think I need it!

I'm sorry for all of your pain and sadness. I expect they felt awkward

Thank you for your response- I hope you’re right, I do suffer from anxiety and keep thinking of awful reasons why they would’ve kept away but yours is far more reasonable and something I can accept

So many people don't know what to say to the bereaved/grieving - I'm absolutely sure that's why people avoided you

Thank you- I’m going to look at this as a learning experience and hopefully use it in future to help others in a similar situation

That's lovely, OP

People think “she doesn’t know me from Adam, she doesn’t want some stranger blathering away at her when she’s grieving” or they don’t know how to introduce themselves without feeling pushy. Very few people can approach a bereaved stranger, even as the daughter of a friend or colleague, and be confident they are saying the right thing. Saying nice things can make the bereaved person start crying etc etc. It’s very human for people to feel immense sympathy for you but not have the ability to bridge the gap.

Thank you Juniper, that does make me feel better