Grieving

[SmartyPants0]

My lovely Mum recently passed away, she had cancer and it was expected but happened a lot sooner than we all thought. We had the chance to talk and made some special memories. I am still feeling numb.
I am planning to have bereavement counselling and planning to run a half marathon to raise money for the hospice where she passed. Would you mind sharing anything that comforted you after losing a parent.

I am very sorry for your loss. I came to read this board because I miss my DM so much. She died very suddenly four years ago. I think that you will be in shock for sometime, even though you knew that she was very ill. It's such an unimaginable gap in one's life, whether the relationship was good or bad. It honestly took two years for me to accept that she was actually gone. I find talking about her comforts me. Tell me something she loved or that you loved about her! My mum could not pass a well trimmed hedge without commenting on it. She was a terrible cook and once plastered the whole of the oven with baked carbohydrate because she didn't prick the baked potatoes and they exploded.

Sorry that all sounds a bit trivial. I had bereavement counselling from Cruise. It was amazing. Free. And the counsellor came to my home each week for eight weeks. It really helped.

The loss of a loved one is always hard but loosing DM / DD can be harder if you were close .
I lost my DM many years ago , she had lots of heath problems , including lots of mini strokes she went from been a mum and wife that held down 2 part time jobs looking after me and my DB , dad , and doing all the house work and cooking to someone that struggled to talk , could not walk and was heavily dependent on my Ddad and home care to look after her , she was always in pain due to very bad arthritis rheumatoid and osto'. we knew it was a matter of time and to be honest it was a blessing when she past .
My Ddad took it hard , but managed to get by . 18 months later he had a brain aneurysm and never regained consensus .

Dealing with My dad death was harder as it was so unexpected . I still talk to both of them , particually in certain situations were I know they would like or hate things I can hear what they would say .
It is hard , I still miss them 20 years later but i have learned to cope with it .

My DH died very suddenly , I found him , I dont think I will ever come to terms with that

I lost my Mum in November. She was in hospital and due to be discharged the next day. I never got to say goodbye, it happened so quickly and I found out while at work. I understand what you're going through. What has been helping me is letting those friends over that want to be there for you and cry on their shoulder, talk about it. It's still so fresh and I'm struggling to accept it still. She never leaves my thoughts :(

I am sorry for your loss, for all of you that have lost loved ones. It’s a hard place to be.

My dm died in an accident nearly 5 years ago and it took me over 3 years before I could laugh naturally. In the depths of my grief I only laughed when I saw others laughing so knew I had to join in.

I had counselling through Cruse which was beneficial at the time if only because it gave me an hour a week to cry without hurting those around me. Then 2 years after that I had more in-depth therapy which really helped me to adjust.

I think that the main thing that helped was to talk about mum and my feelings to others. I would talk about how I was feeling at that particular time rather than how I was the night before etc. That helped me to focus on my feelings and also allowed those around me to help me more.

Time certainly helps but it also hurts too. I found going into each new year hard as it felt as though I leaving her behind and getting further away.