Bereavment support - anyone had it?

[jillybean1984]

I lost my dad aged 64 in December last year to terminal pancreatic cancer very suddenly (he was diagnosed 13th November and died 8th December) I am struggling and miss him terribly.
I have the chance to have some bereavement support from Macmillan where they come to the house and chat with you etc, sort of like a therapy session I suppose. I just wondered has anyone else had somethin like this? I just don't know what to expect.
thanks

I had someone from Cruse come when my husband died. It was great that they came to the house because I had 2 young children and no one to look after them if Id had to go out. A very pleasant man came to the house once per week for an hour, for 6 weeks. I would offer him a cup of tea but he never accepted- we just got straight to business. He was a volunteer and obviously had training and some experience- but he was not a professional counsellor.
However, having the counselling at home did mean I felt I really held back. My kids were just upstairs- I couldn't let go like I really wanted to.
Also, in retrospect, it was too soon! I hadn't had time to get through the shock/ denial stage of grief!!! I wasn't able to reflect properly, it was still too raw and complicated ( DH had had a breakdown and drunk himself to death).
I would definitely take any offer of support though and accept you may need more for years to come.
I'm so sorry to hear about your father. I can tell you loved him very much - and that really matters. I hope you can find strength and comfort.

When my mum died both my brother and I had counselling through Cruse. My brother found it helped him a lot whereas I didn’t although it did give me an hour to sob without worrying about upsetting whoever was with me if that makes sense. Mum died in an accident so everyone around me was very traumatised too.

However, both db and I had more professional therapy a few years later which we have both found to be more beneficial, may be because they are more trained but also because it is further down the line so our emotions are calmer.

I would think it is worth trying the session you have been offered. If nothing else it will give you an hour to talk about your dad with people who understand.