Helping DS1 with loss of Grandmother

[Thelonewolf]

My mum died suddenly last weekend and I don’t think my son (he is 8 in 2 weeks) is doing so well, he alternates between being very angry to very withdrawn!
This is his first experience of death, how can I help him through it?

I was perhaps a little older than your DS when a much loved grandparent died, one of my grandfather’s friends wrote me a really lovely letter saying how proud he had been of me and that I should have many happy memories of our time together. It meant a lot to me, is there anyone who could write a letter to your DS, or could you do it?

I am so sorry for your loss.

My dc wrote letters to my step father when he died and DS made a glittery star for him which he put on the coffin at the funeral. They used to write the letters which we then put up the chimney as DS said that is how they wrote to Father Christmas so it will surelay get to grandpa. It alllowed them to release their feelings and channel them.

When my mum died dd was nearly 10. She wrote a short piece, with her headteacher, about what Nana meant to her and she then read it out at her funeral.

I found it helped dc to allow them time to talk whenever they needed to, and also let them see me crying so they learnt that being upset was okay. I kept my bone wrenching howling for when they were not there but did cry gently at other times.