upset about strangers deaths-is this normal?

[tallulah]

In the last year there have been a few reports in our local paper of teenagers who have died (mainly suicides & accidents). Most of them I didn't know, but all seemed to be from my DDs school. This week the latest one is a 16 year old who was in a car crash with her parents & I realised as I was reading it that I do know her as we were both in the same community panto. I'd never spoken to her but noticed her because she was a brilliant dancer.

I haven't been able to stop thinking about her all weekend. It suddenly occurred to me that her poor parents will get her GCSE results through the post next week, & I couldn't stop the tears.

Is this just a parent thing, as my children are a similar age, or is it a sign of depression to be getting so worked up about someone I hardly know?

(My son's primary school headmistress died in a car crash a few months ago as well & it keeps popping up to haunt me. She was my age & a really good teacher, but again she wasn't actually my friend)

Oh, Tallulah, I know just where you're coming from. When my ds's were teenagers it seemd like one or another of their peers died every month or two, as though they all had some sort of a death-wish. Although so far it hasn't happened with anyone 17yo dd1 knows well, there's been an awful spate of road accidents locally. Five young lads around 19/20yo have died in three accidents, due to their own stupidity, and the older bro of one of dd's friends recently hung himself on his 21st birthday.

It makes my blood run cold to hear of these things, and I think it's because we as parents are unable to do as much to protect our children as we could when they were tiny and with us all the time. They are not under our control and life sometimes seems very threatening to our precious babies. So, I think it's understandable that you feel as you do, though if you think you have depression maybe you should get chekced out with the dr anyway. Take care.

Thanks suedonim. I think you've hit the nail on the head when you say that its because they are not under our control any more. Does it ever end? (DD about to go off to Uni & I'm dreading it!)

Oh this is so sad you are totally justified in feeling this way Tallulah. I feel the same about such things, it's feeling empathy which isn't a bad thing. I think as you get older you become more aware of how precious life is.