When does it get easier?

[redbracelet]

Its coming up to a year since my miscarriage and i am still finding things as hard as they were a year ago.

i'm really sorry for you red. i had a mc years ago and it does gradually improve. have you been able to talk about it?

no. i don't talk about it in RL. At the time i had friends pg with thier own babies, then it fet wrong to talk about it, then they were having theirs when i should have been due and feels wrong to still feel this way

it goes up and down. How was it at the time? I had counselling a long time afterwards and the dark times are a lot less now.

It hurts.

i just tried to carry on for my other DCs at the time. Also had a friend in the middle of the breakup of her marriage and had to be there for her children.

It hurt but i think i hurt more now in a strange way

red, you should talk to someone. i saw a councelor through my gp - bit of a wait but worth it. helps you move on.

btw, it's not wrong to feel how you feel!

Sorry i cant offer any advice because i only mc 13 weeks ago and am still finding it so hard.
I just wanted to pass my best wishes on to you

nickytwotimes, i'm not sure that i can do that. counselling wasn't offered at the time and i can't even say miscarriage out loud now. Griffin, i am so sorry that you are struggling. As you can see i have no advice, altho if you have support round you then please lean on them

I had counselling two years down the line. It helped and I wish I'd taken up the offer earlier.

I'm sure your GP could refer you.
xx

It will be hard on the first anniversary. I had two ectopics about 4 years ago and I still remember the date of both exactly. What I found was to make sure you do something on that day. Not for your loss, but something fun, firstly to help take your mind of it and secondly to put something positive in your memory for next year. That way, next year, you'll give a thought to the miscarriage, but you'll also have some fun memoies of what you did on the same day. Am I making any sense? I hope so. I know it might not suit some people, but it certainly helped me. Something to think about anyway. Wishing you well.xx

please try to get some help be it from friends/family or external help.

My DH had to be dragged for the joint therapy we had. Yes it was painful but it did help him quite a lot.

So sorry you are hurting.