Sister in law just gave birth to stillborn son

[mousemole]

My sister in law and I were pregnant, both with boys and were due within weeks of each other. She had major stress and problems with the baby all the way through the pregnancy = they thought he had a genetic problem/heart deffects etc etc. In the end he sadly died at 34 weeks and my poor sister in law delivered him this weekend. I desperately want to help and see her/my brother/ attend the funeral if there is one and generally let them know I am thinking of them. However I am aware I must be the last person she/they will want to see as I am still pregnant ( even worse with a boy as well). What should I do ? How long should I stay away ?( my baby due in 8weeks). Will they want to see my baby when he is born ? Should I not go to the funeral if there is one ? ( I have a very large bump that I can imagine will not be a nice sight for them. Any advice help/appreciated.

Hi Mouse

How are you and SIL and Brother doing now?

It must be hard for all of you right now, I hope you found someway to be there for them.

I think it is important they know you are there for them, even if they may not want it right now. I would call and ask how they are?

I felt terribly abandoned by people when i had my 3 m/c, most people said nothing at all and ignored the whole thing.
So it was just nice even when pregnant friends, due same time would ring and ask how I was.

I think it may be easier for you to see them now, than after when your baby is born, as you will be full of joy and they will be still grieving. I'm not sure they will want to see your baby straight away, but they may.
It will be very hard for them i imagine.