Can someone please help me find a quote about grief being the price we pay for love or some such phrase

[Sweepingchange]

I hope I am posting this under the correct topic. Many apologies if not.

There was a thread on Mnset a few weeks back in which someone posted a quote along the lines of "the more we loved someone, the more grief we feel."

I am trying to write a letter at the moment, for parents who have lost their child, and despite searching, I can't find the right thread.

The quote wasn't remotely trite or sentimental btw, it was simple and (I thought) appropriate.

Any other advice gratefully received.

As you asked for any other advice, I would say this. Please don't quote anything. Just use your own words to say how sorry you are.

Also please don't say "let me know if there is anything I can do"

This is just my personal view from my own experience.

Thank you very much Sosidges

I certainly would never say "let me know if there is anything I can do". (Best to just do something.)

I wouldn't usually include a quotation either - and may not still - but the particular quote I am after seemed to be particularly appropriate and not at all mawkish.

Why don't you just say that? It's better to speak (or write) from the heart in situations like these

Thank you Reluctantlyredundant

I may not even use the quote on this occasion, but I would still be very grateful to be pointed towards it, for now or for future use. I really just wanted to read it again as I thought it was very compelling.

"The agony is great and yet I will stand it. Had I not loved so much I would not hurt so much. But goodness knows I would not want to diminish that precious love by one fraction of an ounce. I will hurt. And I will be grateful for that hurt for it bears witness to the depth of our meaning. And for that I will be eternally grateful.” Dr. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross

Hope that's the one you wanted

I saw one which I can't find again now sorry, but it started with the words 'Grief is just love with nowhere to go..' Not sure it would be appropriate in your circumstances but it struck a chord with me.

3boys3dogs That's Helen MacDonald H is for Hawk, I think.

Thank you!

Thank you - apologies - only just returned to this thread!

Thank you so much everyone for all of your quotations - they are much appreciated.

I don't think they include the particularone I was thinking of - but very useful nonethless - and raeray's is pretty close so thanks again!

Letter of condolence has been written and posted (after much thought and re-writing) and I didn't include a quote as it happens this time, but still interested in finding the "original"!

I often use this in sympathy cards

Death leaves a heartache no one can heal,
Love leaves a memory no one can steal.

"Grief is the price we pay for love" was a message written by the Queen for a memorial service in the US for 9/11 victims.

But according to this, she was quoting Dr Colin Murray Parkes , a psychiatrist at St.Christopher’s Hospice.

It's now inscribed in a memorial garden in Grosvenor Sq, London: Garden memorial to 9/11 victims

Thank you again for more responses.

Surely that is v close to the quotation I was thinking of, thank you.

I think I have expressed it badly in thread title/op though as I don't think the word 'price' was actually mentioned, more words to the effect of " the more we love, the more we mourn" or some such.

Sorry to resurrect an old thread, but I think I know the source of the quote the op was looking for (in case anyone subsequently comes across this looking for the same quote). It's Charles Darwin; he wrote to a friend, 'Your grief is the necessary price for having been born with (for I am convinced they are not to be acquired) such feelings'.