Happiness has a ceiling

[pennygoodlife]

It's 2 yrs on sat since my DM left me. It's felt like 2 years as well. I've lost both parents. Whilst it was their time, I suppose... And I'm a lucky middle aged mum of two delightful DC I don't think I'll ever be truly happy or maybe I mean carefree, again. I can only get so happy before I hit that ceiling. But if you saw me you'd think I was a happy soul with lots of life. That's what loss does to you. I wish one of them was there for a chat, or just a knowing smile, when the kids are playing up, mum could say " their only kids, relax" when I can't be bothered to rustle up a meal she say oh make it easy on yourself get a take away oh I could go on. Sorry I'm being a bit indulgent. But it's just a sad time at the moment X

Be gentle on yourself. What would they be saying to you now?

Take care of yourself xx

pennygoodlife it's hard isn't it? You're parents would want you to be happy and they would be proud of you with your DC. You're right though, things take on a different slant when you lose a parent

penny just wanted to say sorry for your loss. it must be very hard to lose both your parents. i think losing someone you love changes you forever. you're not as innocent and carefree anymore. hugs for you. xx

Your post resonates with me OP. It's been 2.5 years since my lovely little brother died, and I don't think I'll be as happy as I was before, but I am definitely more appreciative, which I'm glad about. I've just realised that life is inherently sad. Your parent's haven't left you completely if you know how what they'd say to you - they live on in you. Why not have a chat with them, even if they're not there?

losing both parents is just awful, its never the same