my nan has been given a couple of weeks...hospital saying I cant take in the children!!

[Nemo2007]

just been phoned by my mum to say my nan has a couple of weeks as the cancer has taken everything over. Cant stop crying, she hasnt even seen Chloe yet and hardly seen Adam and Hannah with her having lived in spain the past few years. She is in a hospital over an hours drive away who are saying I cant take the kids in to see her. She is being moved on wednesday to one even further away over 2 hrs drive. So do I just turn up with the children tommorow in the hope that someone lets them in??

Well that isn't the case on our ward. If your last weeks had to take place in the hospital it would be awful. It is our job to try and make those last few weeks as bearable as possible. Its not like it on every ward no, but a compassion is needed here. Rules can't always apply to all situations, and I am incredibly proud of how this issue is dealt with where I work.

Most patients can tell when a patient is sick or not. I can't ever remember any patient asking me why there are visitors outside of visiting, for example. And a simple ' I'm not allowed to tell you reasons, but I can assure you it is for a very good reason that the rules have been bent in this circumstance' will answer any other patients question. Anyway, I am going to stop posting now as this isn't fair on Nemo.

No I agree but I did try and make a constructive suggestion about the canteen and point out another possible reason.

nan met ds2 a few eeks before she died, at her 60th weddng anniversary. She came and hugged him, and then said goodbye even though she had been dying for ten years and had no reason to know this really was it. Seemed to give her closure, she felt ready.

My thoughts are with you X

Make sure you get a picture for little Chloe.

Photo is really good idea I also like tose ones where you have all the generations of girls (or boys) together, ie you, your Nan, your Mum and Chloe (would need to try and get your other dd in too I suppose),

sorry to hear about this nemo i dont mean to sound harsh no offence intended if she only has weeks to live would it be great to spend a day with her ask/tell someone at the hospital if it would be possible to take her out for half a day or even an hour at least that way you will get chance to say your goodbyes in your own way and for chloe to see her nan
been in similar sit
i had a 5 year old when i gave birth to my little girl on the 27th august 2001 on the 30th my grandad passed away we was only 20 miles from hospital they rang for us all to say our goodbyes but id want to do it differently, i found it hard to bond with my baby after that felling guilty but alls well now good luck anyways hunni xxgive chloe a kiss from me xx

hi all
thanks for the posts. I took Chloe in to see my nan today, reason we couldnt go to a canteen etc is because she can only lie flat on the bed as the cancer has taken over her whole body. When I got there the staff were lovely and we stayed for 2hrs so my nan got to spend a lot of time with the baby although she did keep asking about DS and DD1 have promised her a picture of all three to keep by her bed. We did take some pictures and was very stressful as obviously she knows what is happening and she isnt an 'old' nan despite being 72. This has all come upon us very quickly as she lives in spain and has been ill for a couple of months but was told it was kidney stones. 2 weeks ago she was able to walk around and manage, now she is confined to a bed in agony so she really doesnt have long left as it is that aggressive. Sorry am going on but suppose typing it down here saves me letting it build up in real life.

I'm glad that you and little Chloe got to go and that you got so long with her. You don't know what a precious thing that is. I hope that her last weeks are peaceful and that you can find the strength to deal with it.

[hugs]

I am glad they got to spend time together..although realised I have no pics of my nan with DD or recently with ds.

When are they moving her?

Oh nemo, I'm glad you got to see her. Where will she be moved to? I know you are incredibly busy but any chance of getting to see her there do you think of do you feel you have said your goodbyes now? [hugs] to you.xx