My best friend died 2 days ago and I can't cry.

[Heatherbell1978]

She was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2013 and lost her battle at the weekend. She was 40. I met her about 12 years ago and she was my closest friend. We did loads together, holidays, nights out, work, she was my bridesmaid. I haven't seen her lots recently because of her illness (not my choice but she's been very weak). She died in a hospice at the weekend. I saw her a week ago. I'm so numb. It comes in waves but mostly I'm just getting on with things with my DH and DS1 who is 18m. I'm devastated but can't seem to just stop and cry.

You will deal with your grief in your own way. It might be that it catches you unawares one day. You don't need to cry.

Sorry for your loss

I'm so sorry for your loss. But it's not compulsory to stop and cry, although it's certainly fine if you want to do that too. It always seems very unreal when someone dies, even if they have been ill. You're probably still processing the news. Everyone copes in their own way.

There is no prescribed way to grieve, I've found I think I'm fine and then suddenly a wave hits me out of nowhere and I have to stop for a while. Just let it happen and don't worry if you think you're doing it "wrong" or it's not how you expected. I also think the grief can be different for a friend or contemporary than a relative IYSWIM. So sorry.

I found it took me a while to cry after dd2. I think you go into a bit of a period of shock and sometimes even denial.

I know people expect grief to be shown with lots of tears but everyone grieves in their own way. My DH very rarely cries about dd2, it doesn't mean he's not grieving though.

It will possibly hit you at some point, at a really mundane time like in the supermarket.

I'm sorry for your loss 💐

I'm sorry to hear about your friend. Like others have said, tears will come, and even if they don't then it's your way of grieving and that's fine. When my brother died I found the numbness the hardest. Big bunch of to you xxxxxx