can I ask for some advice please

[nonetcurtains]

Heard yesterday evening that a friend has lost his baby daughter; I think she was about 4/5 months old.

She had medical problems after birth but they were treated and she has been home for some time.

Sorry to be vague but I don't know the family well, the dad works with my husband, I don't know his wife's name or baby's name.

The advice I need is re Islam faith - death, afterlife, heaven etc. I want to write a sympathy card but as a Christian my words of condolence may not mean anything to the mom & dad. I know it doesn't really matter but I suppose I want to make sure I don't say the wrong thing.

Baby's dad is lovely, his family had a dreadful time last year when his brother's baby also died and I know that affected him greatly. I feel so sorry for them but don't know what to say.

My experience is that people are people, and if you send a card saying sorry for you loss, it will be recieved as such.

I would just say that you're thinking of them at this sad and difficult time, I would think that would be ok in any faith

Thank you for replying. It just doesn't seem enough to say if you know what I mean. 20 hours since we heard and I haven't been able to think about anything else.

Muslims believe in God (Allah) and many believe that everything that happens is His will. They also believe in Paradise after death. A letter or card will be appreciated. Avoid cards with Christian symbols like crosses and representations of people, stick to pictures of flowers or scenery without people in them. Say something along the lines of "So sorry to hear of the sad loss of your baby (or name if you know it). We are remembering you in our thoughts (and prayers - if that is true for you) and hope you will find some comfort in the love and support of those who care for you at this difficult time. Sincerely X & Y"
Also it's afterwards that people need a bit of continuing support. Not pretending everything is alright in case 'we upset them'. They are already upset, but a quiet ward or gesture can make them feel less isolated 'from normal people who haven't gone through such an awful experience', if you see what I mean - having difficulty wording this.
So sad

FadedRed123
thank you so much for you words, they have helped more than you can imagine (also allowed me to cry for first time since hearing the news).

It is so very, very sad.
Would we be welcome at the funeral? Do we wait for an 'invitation'? Please forgive my ignorance. x

Oh Nonet . not sure if I should be sorry if my post made you cry, but maybe you needed to?

yes I did need to cry, I don't feel better but am a bit more at peace with it now. Thanks you for your advice about attending the mosque, DH will find out more today.
I'm going to buy a spring flowering tree that can be planted in memory. Won't give it yet, it seems a bit too soon but will keep it in my garden till they are ready.

That's a lovely idea, Nonet.